LIGHTNOVELONLINE Chapter 67
After finishing the conversation with Abel, I stepped out of the tent. Since it was late, everyone must have returned to their own tents, leaving the camp atmosphere rather quiet.
As the cool night breeze brushed against my face, I felt a bit sentimental. To refresh my mood, I began walking towards the hill at the bottom of the camp.
Yesterday, there were quite a few people out exploring, but today, not a single soul was in sight.
‘Well, today’s monster extermination war was extremely tough.’
Everyone was probably too tired and went to sleep early.
As I walked slowly, I could hear the sound of grass being crushed underfoot. I enjoyed the gentle breeze brushing against my body.
Silphy, who would normally enjoy the breeze with me, seemed tired today and had returned to the spirit realm ahead of me.
It seemed like the connection was cut off as I couldn’t hear her voice in my head. While I pondered these thoughts, I spotted someone sitting far away.
Long, black hair cascading down from where she had let her tied hair loose. Her face had gained some weight compared to before, but she still looked terribly thin.
‘Yurph?’
The girl with the blue eyes, Yurph, was crouched down quietly, looking up at the sky.
Although her body was still emaciated, she looked much better than before. I thought so as I quietly approached her side.
I sat down on the grass, and Yurph’s astonished face came into view. She looked at me with wide-open eyes for a moment before greeting me first.
“..Hello.”
“Hey.”
The scenery was largely the same as usual. After exchanging greetings, silence fell again. It wasn’t as suffocatingly awkward as before, but it felt a bit stifling.
Yurph seemed unconcerned about the atmosphere and was simply gazing at the night sky.
“What are you doing?”
“I’m watching the stars.”
Stars, huh.
Following her gaze, I looked up at the sky and saw countless stars sparkling against the pitch-black backdrop.
None of the constellations I had seen in my previous life were there, but the beautiful sight wasn’t much different from back then.
Eventually, the city lights made it hard to see even a single star.
However, here, just turning my head slightly revealed so many stars that it was hard to count.
“Does Id believe in superstitions about constellations?”
“Huh? Is there such a thing?”
At my question, Yurph looked at me with a curious expression. I awkwardly averted my gaze, as if to say, ‘Why wouldn’t you know that?’
Her eyes seemed genuinely puzzled, not scolding me, and it felt a little painful.
She closed her eyes for a moment and began to explain the superstition.
“According to the superstition, each constellation in the sky represents people’s destinies.”
“Those constellations?”
At my puzzled question, she nodded slowly. Believing that the constellations in the night sky represented people’s destinies was a superstitious notion hard to accept.
If just the humans living in this world were counted, the number would be in the hundreds of millions. So, wouldn’t it always have to be daytime?
While I continued pondering such thoughts, Yurph continued her quiet explanation.
“It’s a well-known superstition, and many people believe in it.”
A typical example would be the Pope.
As she added this, I closed my mouth, which had been about to open. He was the Pope of the Goddess’s Church, so he should know this world better than I did.
“Do you see a star shining brighter than others up there?”
“That is…”
I looked up at the night sky again. As she said, among the stars radiating with pure white light, I saw one that sparkled exceptionally brightly.
But considering it was just one, it didn’t seem like a constellation. That single star flickered as if it might extinguish at any moment.
I knew superstitions were just superstitions, but I couldn’t shake off the ominous feeling. Just as I was about to delve deeper into my thoughts, Yurph spoke again.
“I can’t see it.”
“Huh?”
When I turned my head, I saw her face with a bittersweet smile.
Yurph reached out her frail hand towards the sky. As if wanting to touch that star, her outstretched arm wavered painfully.
“Among the constellations in that night sky, I don’t have a single one.”
“What do you mean…”
“It means I’m an outsider in this world.”
Outsider.
That familiar word made me pause. The feeling on her face was sheer loneliness.
What could cause a girl of her age to wear such an expression?
Her face looked downtrodden and, in some ways, like she had shrunk. It felt too familiar, like seeing a reflection of my past self.
“Ultimately, I’m a fake.”
A fake. I couldn’t guess what she meant by that. However, I could somewhat understand the troubles she was facing.
Because I had once had similar worries to Yurph.
My twin sister, who excelled at everything compared to me. I recalled the memories of always being compared and belittled by my parents while standing next to her.
During my middle school days, in the stormy years, I sometimes thought of myself as my sister’s substitute, a fake.
The thought that a fake was merely a worthless object trapped me, causing emotional wounds.
Supportive comments from those around me only felt harsh.
Ultimately, when the wounds were left to fester until they burst, I ended up saying something I would regret for a lifetime to my sister.
Just like the time I hurt Lily as Adele.
“Man, I really still am a fool.”
I forced a bitter smile and asked Yurph.
“Is being real or fake really that important?”
In the end, what I wanted to say was simple.
Let’s assume real and fake exist. Even if I am a fake, how significant could that possibly be?
“That’s…”
At my question, Yurph’s eyes widened in surprise. It seemed like she had never thought about such a thing; she sat there hesitating.
Perhaps Yurph saw herself as a fake saint.
She had said that her continued fasting was to hope the Pope would retract his decision to recommend her as a saint candidate.
But from all I had seen until now, she was more than saintly.
Despite the irritability from her fasting, she generously brought healing and blessings to others.
Not stopping there, she even risked herself to break the mental interference.
If she wasn’t to be called a saint, then who could be?
“But, no one likes a fake.”
“Do you really think so?”
Yurph hesitated for a moment, then slowly nodded. There was an unmistakable mix of pessimism or resignation in her expression that made it hard to watch.
She looked just like the person I used to be.
“You know, I had a twin sister.”
A past I would normally have kept to myself. It was a memory I couldn’t disclose as Adele von Este.
Adele had neither a sister nor a brother.
But if I borrowed the identity of Id, the spirit knight, I could say it without issue.
Perhaps someday I might tell Abel, but for now, I had no plan to reveal it.
Because I would need to confess the absurd fact that I was a reincarnated being. I highly doubted he would believe something so far-fetched.
Just as I was about to get lost in those thoughts, Yurph spoke again.
“Sister… you mean?”
“Yeah. She was an incredible person.”
She was a remarkable sister who always showcased her outstanding talents far more than I. Whether it was studies, sports, and even the cross-stitching which I was decent at.
Because of this, I always lived in her shadow. Be it school friends, teachers, or even my parents.
Being twins, our faces were alike, and from some point onward, people began to see me as a substitute for my sister.
The boys who approached me, and even my parents—everyone began to think of me as nothing but a substitute for my sister.
Even I came to think of myself as merely my sister’s substitute.
“Fake, that means…”
“Yeah. I felt like I had become my sister’s fake.”
It was around the time I began to feel like a fake, a substitute for my sister, that she got accepted into a prestigious university. Despite our poor family situation, she managed to pull it off.
In this world, it was like a commoner getting into the Imperial Academy. She achieved something extraordinary, which once again pushed me to the back.
“I thought I was a worthless imitation.”
That’s when I went up to the roof.
As I stood before the railing, the first one who rushed to my side wasn’t a friend, nor my parents, but my sister.
She desperately held me as she cried. Then, she shouted something profound.
“You are not just my substitute. You are precious as you are.”
Despite saying that, I disregarded her words and hurled hurtful comments at her.
When did you start caring so much about me? To me, you were just a thorn in my side.
As we fought, when I tried to fall over the railing, my sister jumped to save me.
The last smile I saw at that moment remains an unforgettable memory.
“You know, whether real or fake, it doesn’t matter at all.”
“…”
“What really matters is what kind of person you are.”
If I had realized that fact sooner, perhaps I wouldn’t have spoken such cruel words to her.
If I had known I wasn’t just my sister’s shadow but a kind-hearted little sister, wouldn’t things have been different?
“Can I ask you something?”
“..Yes.”
When I turned my head, I saw Yurph’s eyes welling up with tears.
Seeing that, I couldn’t help but chuckle and pulled out a towel from my pocket to hand it to her.
“What kind of person are you?”
With my question, Yurph, who had hung her head, hesitated for a moment before replying in a small voice.
“..I need some time to think on my own.”
“Okay, I understand.”
I stood up from that spot. When I turned my head back, I saw Yurph with her eyes closed in deep thought.
I didn’t know exactly what her worries were.
But at the very least, I hoped she wouldn’t walk down the same path I had.
That was all I could think about.