LIGHTNOVELONLINE Chapter 400
No matter how I think about it, introducing Kagami as ‘my sister’ didn’t seem right.
But even so, I couldn’t just reveal my identity.
Kagami and I are family. It might seem safe for now, but who knows what kind of accidents Coco might cause in the house in the future.
The best method would be for me to stay close, but even so, there will inevitably be blind spots.
“…This is Coco.”
“Coco!”
As I spoke, Coco raised both arms high and shouted her name.
If I were to argue, her hair and arms wouldn’t be that different, but seeing her make such movements made me wonder if she had the instinct of a ‘human’ in her head.
… A human.
I am a human. At least, I don’t know how to transform my body weirdly. If I cut myself with a knife, I bleed, and probably, my internal organs aren’t that different from others.
I’ve never imagined myself if part of those organs disappeared. I would just think I’d die if I did.
Then what about Coco?
When she had a massive nose, it seemed like she couldn’t see us. She probably couldn’t hear us either. Even when we made small sounds, or shone weak light from the phone, she hardly noticed. Did she sense us through the vibrations on her skin?
She made sniffing sounds that could have come from a nose… and the transformation only happened after she made contact with me.
A human-shaped nose. The pieces of flesh inside the fridge resembled a human body. That means, if she thinks she needs to be, she could potentially exist as a human.
I want to believe that. At least, right now, she wasn’t sniffing but mimicking my voice.
Kagami looked back and forth between Coco and me with a confused expression. It seemed like she wanted to back away immediately, but it also looked as if she wanted to jump forward because of my presence.
“… Is it okay if I help explain?”
The bewildered Kagami and me, along with Coco, who was smiling and tilting her head beside me.
Yuka, who had been watching the three of us, finally stepped forward and spoke.
“… Ah.”
It seemed that only then did Kagami let out a sound as if time had begun to flow.
“Koto Ne?”
Then she called my name once more while looking at me.
I nodded. Yes. That seems to be the best course of action right now.
Even the expert Yuka didn’t know how the situation would unfold, but at least she had witnessed it alongside me. Yuka might have observed the finer details that I missed.
“First, come inside the house.”
Dad opened the door.
“We can’t just stand here.”
After hearing that, we slowly moved our bodies and entered the house.
I grabbed Coco’s shoulder and brought her forward. The part that she mimicked from my clothing was incredibly smooth, just like touching actual clothes.
“…”
Is this the right thing to do?
Once again, that thought crossed my mind, but it was already spilled water.
For now, I decided to listen to Kagami’s opinion.
*
After sharing in detail what Yuka and I experienced today, Kagami had a dazed expression. It was understandable.
I hadn’t told her how I normally fought. I didn’t want to mention it much. Just that fact alone was already giving her a huge sense of guilt, and if I said I deliberately cut myself to make myself bleed, she might just faint.
Yuka seemed to be aware of that to some extent, so she glossed over that aspect. The details we explained included how and where Coco had been sealed. What that woman said, and how Coco had fought.
How Coco had taken on my appearance.
Crunch, crunch.
Perhaps not fully understanding our story, Coco was tilting her head while looking around, then instinctively grabbed a cookie from the living room table and stuffed it into her mouth.
“Whoa!?”
Her eyes sparkled immediately, and then she dove onto the table.
Thud.
It seemed Coco’s weight was similar to mine, as the table didn’t sag from the impact. Coco lay halfway on the table, stuffing cookies into her mouth.
“Coco.”
“Uh-oh?”
When I called her name, Coco turned to look at me.
Cookie crumbs were stuck all over her mouth.
“…”
Both Yuka, who had been talking to me, and Kagami and Dad, who were listening, could only stare at Coco in a daze.
Coco nodded her head a few times before moving her mouth again. The crunching sound of the cookies breaking in her mouth could be heard.
“Phew.”
Kagami covered her face with trembling hands.
“Mom…”
“Koto Ne.”
When I called Kagami, she quietly murmured my name.
“Yeah.”
“That woman said you were her ‘sister,’ the sister of Koto Ne.”
“… Yeah.”
“When found, she was in a form that could not be called a person.”
“… Yeah.”
Do you know something?
Those questions didn’t easily come out. Kagami seemed to have an attitude that indicated she knew something for sure, but it looked like that memory was intensely painful for her.
Is it really because she is our mom? Or did Kagami also come into existence in a similar way to us? I don’t know.
But I decided not to ask in detail. I was curious about hearing it right now, but I didn’t want Kagami to be in pain because of my curiosity.
“Right.”
Kagami answered as if she had sorted out her thoughts, and then she took her hands off her face.
She then lightly leaned against the sofa, closed her eyes, and seemed to be lost in thought, then,
“Phew.”
She exhaled deeply.
“Okay.”
Kagami said so and stood up.
“Mom?”
“… Koto Ne, Yuka. It’s still not mealtime, right? … And Coco too.”
Kagami looked at us and asked gently, smiling as if that earlier worry was nothing and returning to her usual cheerful self.
“Uh, yeah.”
I couldn’t help but nod.
Is this really okay? Just hearing this explanation once is enough?
Kagami nodded at us, then looked at Dad. “I’ll prepare the meal.” Saying that, she headed for the kitchen.
I stood up instinctively and followed Kagami.
“Mom.”
Without speaking, Kagami began to prepare. Actually, it seemed she had prepared a bit early, so it would fit with our arrival time.
I thought of asking if she was okay, but seeing Kagami’s hands trembling slightly, I kept my mouth shut.
Her heart hasn’t settled. She doesn’t fully understand the situation. It’s just that there was no other choice but to accept this situation.
Kagami had never been angry with me until now. The only time I had was when we were left alone together shortly after I arrived—just a brief lamentation.
Even though what I did today was a major incident.
“Uh-oh?”
Did she catch onto the atmosphere?
Coco, who had come near me without me noticing, tilted her head and made that sound.
Kagami’s hands, which had been putting various things on the table, paused for a moment.
Kagami lifted her gaze and looked at Coco. Her eyes trembled slightly. Her face was now pale and appeared frightened.
Is she scared?
But soon, a smile appeared on Kagami’s face.
For some reason, that smile didn’t seem forced.
… Perhaps Coco mimicking my appearance worked out positively.
I still had no reassurance, though.
“Coco. No.”
As Coco reached for something on the table, I gently grabbed her hand.
“It’s not ready yet.”
“Uh-oh?”
Coco tilted her head as if she didn’t understand, still having cookie crumbs on her mouth.
Should I say it’s good she ate that beforehand?
*
*
*
… Breakfast at our house is always busy.
Koto Ne is a diligent child, but she’s not without her morning sleepiness, so if I don’t wake her up beforehand, time becomes a bit tight. But thankfully, she’s never been so lazy as to be overly late.
Currently, my husband, who is protecting our family as Maeda-san, leaves early for work.
“There’s no need to wake sleeping children ahead of time.”
I’m grateful that he tells me that, so Koto Ne rarely has to wake up in the morning to eat with us.
… Children.
Yes, children. Since last weekend, we’ve had two children in our home.
The child I brought. Koto Ne.
She is such a good child. It’s hard to believe that I gave birth to her.
I can’t even imagine what made me think of that child as a mere tool to get some relief from my circumstances. It’s unimaginable from where I stand now.
…Well, I must have made that judgment back then, which is why I could escape while cradling Koto Ne.
Until then, I had given birth to ‘children’ multiple times.
The girl Kosuzu had dismissed as a failure in those children.
Looking back on it, those weren’t ‘children’ at all.
They were ‘a child.’
Shattered to pieces.
Not like Koto Ne, who spent a solid ten months in my womb but rather, who had come and stayed briefly several times, that kind of child.
“…”
In the still empty kitchen, I strained to find my balance by clutching the table.
Since last night, thinking about that makes my head spin.
Koto Ne slept in her room again today. She probably couldn’t help but feel curious about her ‘sister’ that I brought with me. She is just that kind-hearted.
I asked her several times if she was okay. Today, Koto Ne has to go to school. I will be left alone with that child in the house.
Maeda-san has said he could stay with us, but no, perhaps this is something I must face on my own.
…
I believed that child wasn’t an ‘individual.’
That child was a piece of the one who had managed to withstand in me for weeks to months. The scream I let out when I first saw her is still vivid.
Pain. A raw smell. Tch, the sound of Kosuzu clicking her tongue.
Over the long years, I’ve grown accustomed to it through repetition.
Yes, I have seen that child wrapped in plastic, just as she was shattered. I witnessed her being kept chilled inside a cold fridge.
Why hadn’t I realized it?
All of them, in the end, came about in the same manner.
Those were children born from my painful womb.
There was no way they could be different.
It feels strange inside.
After a long time, a prickling pain stings in my throat, and a sour taste fills my mouth. I cover my mouth and sprint to the bathroom.
I hope the sound didn’t reach the second floor.
“Mom?”
By the time I rinse my mouth and come out of the bathroom, I hear a voice from upstairs as the door opens.
A sleepy voice. The voice of my beloved daughter.
“Uh-oh…”
And the voice that follows.
I hear footsteps.
I saw her yesterday, but how am I supposed to look upon that child?
Just because she doesn’t look like Koto Ne, I left her and came out.
The children are coming down.
Today, I will be left alone with that child, right?
In truth, my mind is not settled.
Certainly, the form in my memory was not that of a person. It was a sight I could neither comprehend nor accept.
However, the form in front of me now is…
Yes.
It’s the appearance of Koto Ne that I brought. It’s no different.
An child who looks like Koto Ne, smiles like Koto Ne, and speaks in Koto Ne’s voice.
The child who could have been,
Ah.
If I had known that this child could have been like this before Koto Ne, would I have run away with her?
I don’t know.
I really don’t know…