Heretical Fishing: A Cozy Guide to Annoying the Cults, Outsmarting the Fish, and Alienating Oneself

B3 | 17 - Oh Baby, a Triple



When the sand beneath my feet turned to rocky headland, I took a deep breath of the salt-filled air. I had all the things I could need; an armful of rods, a smattering of friends with me, and Maria. As a stiff breeze blew past, Bumblebro and Queen Bee crawled down from my shoulder to take refuge in my pocket. Their cute little heads poked out, gazing at the surrounding landscape in the afternoon light.

Deklan, Maria, Snips, and Borks followed right behind me. I stole a glance at Deklan. As with every time we’d interacted, the man was a walking contradiction. When I’d invited him to come fishing, he seemed excited. Filled with anticipation. He’d grown up in Gormona, so had been well and truly indoctrinated to believe that anything water-related was going against the gods, yet that didn’t deter him.

But then I mentioned that I’d also invited the crown prince to come fishing.

A dark cloud had crossed Deklan’s face, and even now he remained somber, simply staring at the ground as we crossed the slick rocks. I shared a glance with Maria, both subtly wincing at my misstep. Refocusing, I took a deep breath, tasting the salty air once more.

If he’s anything like me, I thought, a little fishing will do wonders for his worries.

As we stepped onto the section of rockwall that was System generated, I set down my armful of rods. Maria placed the tackle box beside them, squeezing my arm before stepping back.

“Okay,” I said, smiling at Deklan. “I think it’s best we start with the basics, so I’ll show you how to tie the knots. Would you mind catching us some bait, Maria?”

“Of course!” She flicked open the tackle box and removed a sabiki rig, not wasting a moment in tying it to her rod. “One eel coming right up—hopefully a stinky one.”

As she walked over to the side of the rockwall and cast out, I ran Deklan through making a paternoster rig. His hands were rough and calloused despite his often lackadaisical nature, reflective of the training he’d done as a member of the capital’s guard forces, and though he wasn’t yet a cultivator, he emulated the knot expertly on the first attempt.

“How does it look?” he asked, holding it up.

“Perfect, mate. Now all we need is some bait.”

“Working on it!” Maria called, staring calmly at the water.

I watched her for a long moment, lost in the way her hair swayed in the soft breeze, but then I felt someone approaching.

I recognized the chi signature, and as I turned Keith’s way, I spotted the man walking beside him. Trent, the crown prince of Gormona, had a pensive expression.

“G’day, guys!” I said, standing. “Deklan, you’ve met Keith and Trent?”

“Trent...?” Deklan asked, his eyes narrowing. “Fischer...” He leaned in close, whispering, “That’s the Trent you were talking about? He’s not the prince...”

I rubbed the back of my head. “Er, they can hear you, mate. Cultivator hearing and all that. It’s a long story, but that’s definitely the prince.”

Deklan’s frown deepened. “I don’t mean to offend, but I’d recognise him. I’ve seen him countless—”

“Hello, Deklan,” Trent replied, the sadness in his eyes betraying the fake smile he gave. “You once told me that only my opinion of myself mattered, and that I should ignore my family’s insults. I believe I threw a jug of wine and a half-eaten pastry at you for your kindness.”

Deklan froze. “It... what?” His eyes widened as he looked Trent over. “It’s... really you?”

“It is. I’m sorry for how I treated you previously. It...” He clenched his jaw, a hint of fire entering his eyes. “I wasn’t myself.”

“Uh, I mean... that’s... okay?” Deklan asked, looking at me, then back to Trent, clearly flummoxed. “I’m surprised you remember me...”

“Cultivator,” Trent replied, pointing at his chest. “I remember pretty much everything, unfortunately.”

A silence stretched between us, and I let it linger for a moment, making sure they weren’t going to continue. Borks slid over and licked my leg, wagging his tail up at me and calming my racing mind.

“Okay,” I said, patting Borks’s head and giving him a smile. “Now that everyone has been reintroduced, do you need my help setting up?”

“No,” Keith replied, “I’ve got it. Trent only wants to watch for now.”

“No worries! I brought all the spare rods in case you change your mind. I might go help Deklan cast out, then.”

Keith nodded at me and started setting up his rod. I led Deklan down the stone walkway, smiling at Snips who had crawled across the rocks and was resting in the tidal zone, blowing happy little bubbles. As we approached Maria, her rod’s tip twitched. She braced her body, and the moment the fish bit down on her hook, she struck. Pulling up softly, she set the hook and kept tension on the line. She wound the reel in slowly, seeing if any more fish would take the bait.

Her patience and technique were rewarded.

Something much larger struck, making the rod bend down under its weight. Maria’s face lit up and a gust of wind blew past her, making her hair sweep back in a chaotic tangle. She paid no mind to the strands whipping around her face as she reeled the line in, grinning at the churning water beneath her. We came to a stop beside her, both Deklan and I leaning forward to try catch sight of what she’d hooked.

A flash of silver shone, reflecting the sunlight as the bait fish tried to escape. Maria lifted it out of the water, and when I saw what was attached to the bottom hook of her rig, I beamed a grin. I glanced at Deklan, whose face was showing sheer confusion, tinged with a little disgust.

“What. Is. That?” he demanded, gesturing with both hands.

Maria and I both cackled, our amusement mixing with excitement.

“A monkeyface eel of the pungent variety,” Maria replied. “If you think it looks bad, wait until you smell it.”

As if responding to her comment, the universe sent another gust of wind our way, bringing with it the eel’s horrific scent.

“Philyra’s blessed odors,” he swore, covering his mouth. “That’s something.”

I let out a laugh as I gazed at the eel, letting it draw my eyes in.

Pungent Monkeyface Eel

Rare

Found in the brackish waters of the Kallis Realm, this mature variation of the Common Eel has high oil content and a pungent scent, making it unpalatable food but excellent bait.

I shook my head, clearing my vision. Maria lobbed the juvenile shore fish she’d hooked, and the small creature landed back in the water with a soft splash. She grabbed a spike from her hip and moved to dispatch the eel, but Snips scuttled forward, hissing to wait. My trusty crab was on it in an instant. Her clacker slammed down, making the eel go immediately still. Using meticulous bursts of her chi, she sliced it into hook-sized chunks.

Both my eyebrows flew high. “Dang, Snips. Your control is getting better...”

She shimmied under the praise, blowing a stream of content bubbles. I bent to pat her head, and she leaned into my touch, making me scratch her even harder. When the scritches were complete, she returned to the waterline, settling in between two rocks and closing her eye as a small wave washed over her.

“That’s our bait sorted,” I said. “Ready for your first taste of fishing, Deklan?”

“Yeah...” He nodded, his lips slightly pursed as he stared at Snips. “I can’t believe you have so many spirit beasts.”

“Right? I’m a lucky bloke.” I reached up into my pocket and softly patted the heads of the two insects there. Bumblebro and Queen Bee buzzed their wings happily, returning my affection.

I bent and picked up a chunk of fish, then slipped my hook through it, showing Deklan the best way to present the bait. He mimicked my movement expertly, sliding his bait just as I had.

“Well done. Let’s get these lines in the water.”

I led him down the rockwall, and when we reached the end of the walkway, I stood tall, assessing the ocean’s movement. It seemed the tide was coming in, so I faced north, not wanting the lines to get dragged toward the rivermouth.

“Flick your reel over like this, mate, then hold your finger to the line so it stays taut and doesn’t unwind.”

Deklan watched my hands, doing just as I did.

“Perfect,” I continued. “Cock the rod back, and when you flick it forward, take your finger off the line.”

I sent my sinker and bait flying at a forty-five degree angle. It made a quiet plop when it hit the water a few moments later, sending a splash of water up that reflected the afternoon light. I wound the reel in a few times so my line was taut, then rested a finger on it, waiting for a bite.

“Think you can do that, mate?” I asked. “I cast to the left, so send yours out to the right. It’s a whole thing if our lines get tangled.”

“I think I can,” Deklan replied, stepping forward. He held his rod over his shoulder, watched the hook and sinker for a long moment, then lobbed it out to sea.

The angle was a bit off and it sailed higher than intended. When it hit the water, it hadn’t gone as far as mine did.

He gave me a grimace. “Should I try again?”

“Nah, that’s good! That was outstanding for a first cast. Wind your line in like I did, then rest your finger on the line. You’ll feel it when a fish bites.”

He nodded, an intense look of focus on his face that made me smile.

I sat down on the rocks, getting comfy as I leaned into the sensations of my body. The wind blew fitfully, washing over me in small bursts that made my clothes ripple and tickle my skin. Though the breeze was cold, the afternoon sun shone down from above, a perfect counterpoint that canceled out winter’s chill. Small waves crashed on the rocks beneath us, causing droplets of water to hit my legs. The longer I focused on the myriad sensations peppering me, the deeper I sunk into the moment.

I slipped into a meditative state without even realizing it, the shape of my body melting away and becoming a cloud of feeling.

The chi coursed through the world all around me, sweeping this way and that. It reminded me of the ocean’s churning waves, the lines of essence a part of something greater—something whole. There was a kernel of truth in that realization, my core seeming to hum its agreement. I felt at the boundary of my core, marveling at how far it had come in my short time in this world.

Something tugged at my attention, and I tried to sweep it away, content with being lost within myself.

It came again, and I shook my head, slowly returning to the world.

“Fischer!” Maria called.

“What’s up?” I asked, turning toward her voice.

She was beside me, her rod in hand and line out between Trent and I. She gave me an exasperated look. “Your rod, you goose!”

“What?” I turned forward, seeing my rod bent almost in half, its tip twitching. “Oh!” I shot to my feet. “Fish on!”

“No kidding!” she replied, a laugh bubbling up from her throat. “Lucky it hooked itself, you peanut!”

“O-oh!” Deklan yelled. His eyes were pinned to his rod. “I think I had a bite—”

With all our gazes on his rod, it bent fully in half, cutting his sentence short. “F-Fish on?” he yelled, sounding more like a question than a statement.

“Double hookup!” Maria beamed at us. “Keep your like tight, Deklan. Fischer doesn’t use barbed hooks, so if it goes slack, the fish can—”

She cut off as something massive struck her line. “Whoa! Fish on!” She laughed uproariously. “Triple hookup!”

All three of the fish fought valiantly, never once tiring as we dragged them toward the rocks. Unlike other creatures I’d battled on the end of my line, whatever these fish were, they never changed tack; they fought to escape with everything they had the entire time. With my enhanced body, I brought my fish to the rocks first.

When I caught sight of its body, my forehead creased. It was smaller than I’d expected, the fish having put up a fight that belied its size. But adrenaline quickly swept my confusion away; it was a new species. I lifted it up from the water by holding the line and got a good look at it. The first thing I noticed was the razor-sharp teeth lining its mouth. It flopped around in the air, just as energetic without the water as it was within.

As Maria and Deklan pulled theirs from the water, my fish drew my vision in.

As I shook my head, clearing my field of view of the description, my eyes went wide. I looked over at Maria, seeing her vision distant as she inspected hers. The moment they cleared, her head darted toward me.

“Does that mean what I think it does...?”

I nodded, grinning. “It does. Looks like we—”

Light exploded from behind Maria, illuminating our surroundings as a pulse of chi almost knocked me off my feet.


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