Her True Form

Yvette lightly picked at the small stone plate of strange plants in front of her. It wasn’t that the food was bad. In fact, the food was delicious. The strange herbs and spices the zmaj used were incredible. Their diets were heavily fish based, but they also grew a wide assortment of different vegetables and fruits that seemed to thrive in this strange land. She imagined it was yet another gift from the dragon turtle.

As good as the food was, it didn’t change how it was presented. The zmaj held their meals as public affairs. A very large structure, one of the few that weren’t shaped like a small mountain, was where the meals were prepared and eaten. While there were a few tables and sometimes meals would be taken to those who could not leave, the floor of the structure was covered in thick furs and most would just sit in a random area and devour their meal there.

Unfortunately, as feasting was a public affair, it meant that there were plenty of whispers and hissing sounds filling the air while the zmaj discussed among themselves. While she couldn’t make out much of what they said in dragon tongue, she had managed to learn enough to know they were occasionally speaking about her and Gervas. The frequent glances in their direction only made her feel more uneasy the longer they were here.

Fortunately most of the zmaj seemed too busy working on repairs after the storm and so there were only a handful of them to gawk at the two. She tried to force down what she could. After this meal they would return back to their home and likely not have another meal until far, far later in the day, when most of the zmaj would have already eaten their fill and once more left the structure almost empty. The last thing she wanted to do was get hungry before then and have to dig into their stored rations. There was no telling when they’d need them.

She felt a soft pang of guilt, glancing towards Gervas who ate his meal with a stony silence. He never complained or objected to this, but she knew he had decided they’d stick to this meal schedule for her sake. It was yet another attempt to protect her, keeping her separated as best he could from the zmaj. The things they whispered about her were far, far worse than what they said about him, after all. If it was just him, he’d likely be able to come and eat whenever he desired, but he refused to leave her side.

Yvette stuffed a small, green pepper into her mouth and sunk just a little more into the fur. If not for her, he wouldn’t even be here. He’d probably be off, tending to some other job. Protecting a better mage than her. One who hadn’t--

“Stop that,” Gervas said, glancing over to her.

“W-what?” she asked, nearly choking on the pepper and starting to cough, pounding on her chest a few times to clear it before grabbing her mug and quickly downing the sweet tasting nectar within to clear her throat. “I’m not doing anything, I just--”

“You’re working yourself up again.”

“I-I was not!” she lied, her cheeks burning. “I--”

“You were doing those soft little sighs you always do whenever you start to get upset,” he said firmly. “I’m not sure what has you sad now, but stop beating yourself up. None of this is your fault.”

She gave a light chuckle. “I think by definition, everything here is my fault. I’m the one who wanted us to come here. I--”

“We were the ones who found out what was going on here and put a stop to it,” Gervas said firmly. “If we hadn’t come here, these people would have still been cut off from the rest of the world with that creature out there, trapping them.”

“I don’t think they see it as that way,” Yvette mumbled, glancing around at the few eating. She caught one of them staring at her, though they quickly looked back down at their food. “I think some, maybe even most, of them would have preferred to believe that Hsrg… Hsgrock… Hs… that the dragon turtle had never left them.”

Gervas nodded. “Maybe. The truth is sometimes terrible. Better they know now, rather than someone truly terrible finding out and using it against them. There are more than a few mages out there who would have loved to find out that this island wasn’t protected anymore. Who knows what would have happened then?”

Yvette rolled her eyes. “I don’t think anyone would have wanted to come here if they had to go through that thing. Why would a mage even want that? It’s not like--”

“An entire island where they could do almost anything they desired, cut off from the rest of the world? I can imagine they--”

“The zmaj have mages as well,” Yvette said quickly. “Some of which are powerful. I don’t think any mage would have come here to do some… whatever it is you think they would do,” she said before shaking her head. “You know, not every trouble in the world comes about because of mages.”

“Magic, then.”

“Or magic,” she said. “You know, I’m a mage. It doesn’t make me terrible. You’ve almost died to protect me a few times, so you must think I’m somewhat good.”

Gervas gave a small shrug. “You’re just one of the good ones.”

Yvette rolled her eyes. “There are plenty of good ones. Not every mage is going to--” The words caught in her throat when she saw the entrance flap of the building open and a large, green zmaj walked inside. They scanned the room before turning towards them. It was Osiron again and, unfortunately, he looked angry. He wiped the dirt off his feet at the entrance before making his way towards them.

“Yvette, Gervas,” he said once he was close.

“Osiron,” Yvette said softly. She felt the tension swelling inside her. Last time she had seen the zmaj look angry, especially in her direction, they had nearly been banished from the island and instead tossed into what the other zmaj had believed would be certain doom. Instead, it had resulted in her discovering the truth about the island’s protector and nearly being eaten by it.

Still, she couldn’t help feeling anything but pity for this zmaj. In many ways, Osiron was like her. He wasn’t quite a he, or at least, he didn’t seem to be. Like her, he felt as if he had been born in the wrong body. Unfortunately, he still tried to be a man, demanded it. She had even transformed him into a girl for a short time, allowing him to experience what it felt to be a woman. And then she had the misfortune of watching the large, green zmaj practically fall apart with despair.

She couldn’t begin to imagine what was going on in the zmaj’s head every time he saw her. How hard it had to be, knowing what you were and yet being unable to pursue it. She only hoped that one day he would be able to accept what he was, what SHE could be.

But then, if the weird looks she received from the rest of the zmaj and the way Durandet treated her was any inclination, then Yvette couldn’t blame Osiron for deciding to remain as he was. There was no telling what would happen if he even tried. As much as she wished she could force him to see, all she could do now was accept that this was who he had to be for now.

“Once you’ve finished your meal, I would like to speak with you. Durandet has already spoken with you, correct?”

“Somewhat, yes,” Gervas said, his eyes not leaving the plate. “Apparently the guardians overruled her? I take it that was your doing?”

“Not entirely, but yes,” the zmaj said, his face softening. “My apologies, yet again.”

Yvette shook her head. “It’s fine. You’ve already apologized enough for what happened. You didn’t know how Durandet would respond.”

“If I hadn’t allowed myself to be weak, then you never would have been blamed or hurt,” he said firmly.

“You weren’t weak,” Yvette said quickly. “You were hurt and--”

“We will not discuss this now,” Osiron cut her off, shaking his head. “That is not why I’ve come here. There is more information I wish to give you, information I am sure that Durandet left out. Please, finish your meal and come with me.”

Yvette nodded, stuffing the last few pieces from her plate into her mouth and quickly following them up by drinking from the last of her mug. She noticed Gervas was already doing the same, taking the dishes from her to give back to the zmaj. She waited, less than patiently, for his return.

It was a relief when the three of them finally stepped out from the building, leaving those questioning gazes behind. Even if she did tense up again once she felt more confused eyes on her when they walked the streets. She tried to ignore them, instead turning her gaze towards Osiron. “So, what is it we need to know?”

Osiron gave a soft sigh, shaking his head. “You have been invited to attend the vessel leaving, correct?”

Yvette nodded, feeling tension rise in her stomach and her meal starting to settle uneasily. She hadn’t thought about it until now, but she realized it would be the ideal way to get rid of them. Kill them both at sea, then toss them overboard. Was that the plan all along?

“The vessel itself won’t be going to the main continent, it will just be contacting the merfolk. I’m sorry if Durandet implied more.”

Yvette felt herself relax a little, glancing back to Gervas. She noticed a little tension leaving him as well. She wondered if he’d had the same thoughts. No. He’d probably been thinking that this entire time and already had a dozen plans to deal with the situation. “She told us that. If you don’t mind me asking, why? How far are we going out?”

Osiron gave a soft sigh, this time with exasperation. “Not very far at all. This stays between us, okay? Tell no one else,” he said, his voice going low.

Yvette nodded, glancing around nervously. She couldn’t help but notice the path they were taking led them away from many of the homes, instead out towards the fields where they tended their livestock and plants. Where there were less zmaj to eavesdrop on them. “Yes?”

“Right now, things are tense. Durandet wants to keep things as they are, to pretend that Hsgrogn is still with us. There are those who agree with her. The flame still burns and still allows us to be reborn when we come of age. They believe, when the time comes, he will return to our home to rule us once more.”

Yvette nodded. “I see. I mean, the magic is still there, so it’s likely that the dragon turtle is somewhere. What does everyone else believe?”

“There are two other factions that are beginning to form,” Osiron mumbled. “There are those, like I, who believe that Hsgrogn is still out there, watching over us. That this is a test. That he is seeing what we will do without his guidance. Without his leadership. I believe that it is our duty to reach out to the rest of the world, to stand on our own feet now. Our Great King has not abandoned us, but we must make the decisions for ourselves now. To follow the lessons he has taught us. The only way to do that is to reach out to the world once more.”

“And the other?” Yvette asked, feeling tension rising inside her.

“There is a small faction that believes that Hsgrogn has betrayed us. That he has chosen to abandon us entirely and that we should respond in kind. That we should cast away the chosen and guardians and choose our own. They are small, for the time being, but there is danger brewing now.”

Yvette felt another small pang of guilt swelling inside her. If they started to come to blows, she couldn’t imagine the blood that would be shed. Her eyes wandered over the sharp claws and thick scales of Osiron. “Do you think it’ll come to violence?”

“It will not,” Osiron said firmly. “For now, we are reaching out to the world once more, connecting with those who have always been good to us. Perhaps the merfolk will even be able to contact our Great King and determine why he left us. But things are changing here, Yvette. Quickly. Tensions are rising. There are more than a few who would love to see the pair of you gone forever. Either taken by the merfolk or something more permanent.”

Yvette felt that tension rise inside her once again. So perhaps her initial thought was correct after all. “I see,” she said softly. “And this ship is a good way to do it, then?”

“Indeed. We have only a handful of vessels remaining from before we were closed off from the rest of the world. Some that were stored away, a few that were used for fishing. Most aren’t sea worthy. None are able to go the great distance that would be required to make it to the mainland. Even worse, we have only a few mages who have studied water or navigational magic. We aren’t going to the merfolk because they are the best choice. They are our only choice. So much knowledge has been lost on how to travel the seas and, until we gain aid, will remain lost.”

“That’s actually comforting, then,” Gervas said calmly.

“How is any of this comforting? Someone is bound to try and kill us on the boat,” Yvette said, her heart already hammering.

“It means we’re unlikely to be going very far out. More importantly, it seems your leaders understand just how dangerous the sea can be,” he said to Osiron. “I’m not a sailor, though I’ve worked on a ship often enough. It can be deadly if you’re not careful or ill equipped. You’re right, if you tried to travel out to the mainland now, you’d perish. If anyone can aid you, the merfolk can. It likely won’t be easy to contact them, however.”

Osiron nodded. “No, it likely won’t. But for now, it is the best we can do. The ship you’ll be traveling on is large, but ill suited for going too far out to sea. I ask that you be careful. While there are many who would enjoy hearing of an accident occurring while you two were out at sea, I am not among them.”

Yvette gave a small nod before glancing around. Once she was certain nobody was near enough to listen, she turned back to him. “Osiron, my offer still stands. If you wanted to come with us and--”

“My place is here,” he said firmly. “I am Osiron. I will not abandon my home when it needs me most.”

“But you--”

“Have a duty. While I am forever sorry for the hardships that my weakness on that night caused you, I cannot and will not allow myself to consider them again.”

“It’s not a weakness!” Yvette said firmly, her hands clenching into fists at her side. “It’s who you are. You can’t just deny yourself like that, all you’re going to do is hurt yourself. You--”

“I am Osiron. That is all,” he said firmly. “I appreciate your kindness, Yvette. Your offer is generous, but my place is here. With my people. Just as yours is on this quest of yours. I do wish you the goal you desire. But do not mistake your quest for mine.”

Yvette ground her foot into the dirt. “Osiron, this isn’t--”

“Yvette,” Gervas said, taking her hand.

She glanced back at him. “What? I just...” She trailed off before giving a soft sigh. She glanced back to Osiron, before looking away once more. “I just want you to be okay. If this makes you happy, then fine. I wish you only the best. Just know that the offer stands as long as needed. If you ever change your mind--”

“I won’t,” Osiron said quickly before turning away from her. “Now, please. I would prepare for the voyage. One of the tenogn will come to collect you once the time of departure is chosen. I do hope you’ll find that spell useful.”

Yvette gave a nod, before turning and storming away, Gervas’ hand still tightly holding hers. She glanced back at the zmaj, her heart hurting just a little. Once she was out of earshot, she spoke up. “I hate this,” she whispered to him.

“I know. I do, too,” Gervas said back softly, moving to walk besides her but not letting her hand go.

“They’ll probably try to kill us. Again. Why do people keep trying to kill us?” she asked softly.

“Most don’t. But, like all mages, you often stick your nose into the most dangerous places,” he said in a teasing tone.

Yvette’s cheeks burned. “I do not.”

“You really, really do. But it’s fine. If mages knew how to survive on their own, how would I make money off protecting you?”

She gave a light snort, slowly opening her fist inside his hand, then wrapping her fingers around his. “You know, I think you’re projecting. I think you just like the danger, not the money.”

Gervas laughed and shook his head. “I am hardly a thrill seeker. I’d be quite content to have a small cottage off in some small town, spending the rest of my days calm and relaxed.”

Yvette paused, imagining him spending the rest of his life in a calm, restful lifestyle. She gave a light snort. “I find that hard to believe. I don’t think you’d last a week.”

He gave a light chuckle. “Do not mistake me for a mage, young lady,” he said with a mock scolding tone. “I have no desire for danger or eternal study that you mages find so appealing. I just want comfort.”

“Of course you do,” she said with a roll of her eyes. “Come on, let’s go get ready. You can be comfortable while I practice that spell. I’d rather not have a repeat of last time.”

A life of comfort? She couldn’t help but wonder if he actually believed that. If he wanted comfort, he wouldn’t be so close to her. Her hand tightened just a bit around his, squeezing it a little harder. Her life was going to be anything but comfortable.

But so long as he was in it, she felt it could at least be happy.