LIGHTNOVELONLINE Interlude – Lhexa (L.000)
Content Warning: Sexual Assault
It's not often I write something this dark. Please take care of yourself and don't read anything that's going to harm you! If sexual assault as a subject can send you spiraling, I encourage you to skip this one or even message me for a summary if you want to know but don't want to read it!
Boring.
The idols on stage were singing and doing a perfectly synchronized dance.
♫
So naive, forgot to read the fine print
shouldn'ta signed, now you're all mine, bitch
Love is a spell, I put my hex on you,
Your heart is mine, I’m here for my due
nowhere to run! isn't it fun!
to pull and strain
your rope n chain!
go on, struggle in vain
you're mine
♫
The idol group Coven was live in front of a sold out audience. A sea of fans stretched out in front of the stage, chanting the names of their favorite idol or simply cheering their hearts out.
♫
I'll never let that leash grow long
I'm tightening the line
plunge you into bubbling pot,
you've never looked so fine
your eyes so wide and startled
your lips a perfect 'Oh'
my brew takes you over
the spell begins to glow
shoulda read the fine print,
now you'll never know
the reason that I chose you,
or how deep my magic goes
♫
A huge bubbling cauldron was the centerpiece of the stage, while the girls danced around it. Each one of them having a few unique moments to stand in front of the crowd and toss something into the pot, or cast a ‘spell’ aided by drones equipped with holographics.
♫
so naive, just the way that I like it,
shouldn'ta signed, but I'm glad you're mine, bitch
love is a spell, and I put my hex on you,
your heart is mine, and I'm here for my due
♫
The finale of the song was approaching, as the music drew to a climax. The lights went dark after the last group line, and for a second there was silence. It was broken by a cackle, as a spotlight came down on the leader of Coven, Beatrix. She had a solo segment right at the very end.
♫
Times up bitch!
hahahahaha!
eye of newt! toe of frog!
throw that fucker in my pot!
shouldn't have broke what never was yours
I'm taking what's mine as a matter of course
rip through your rib cage kissing your soul
found all the pieces I'm making them whole
♫
As the performance drew to a close, the idols each took a signature pose before heading off stage. Once away from public eyes, most of the girls sagged. They were exhausted, and it showed as they each made their way back to their rooms.
As soon as Lhexa entered, she let herself collapse onto her bed. She didn’t have very long to rest and wanted to make the most of it. Because any second now–
There was a knock at the door, before it opened without waiting for a response. Great. She sat up, and put on a smile.
“Mr. Manager! How can I–”
“Your performance was off again.”
Yeah, that’s what she thought. She’d been working herself to the bone outside of the performances and scheduled practices, so it was really no wonder. Of course, it’s not like she had a say in the matter. But, she had a part to play in this conversation, so she affected her best chastised act.
“I’m sorry. I’m just working too hard. I’ll do better next time.”
“I can’t keep sticking my neck out for you. If you don’t improve soon, you won’t have a place here anymore. Your implant reported being 1.6% off timing. That’s 0.2% worse than even yesterday. Don’t just say you will do better. I told the director that you won’t accept pay for today if you can just get another chance tomorrow.”
A candy sweet shell that covers a rotten core. Boring.
Lhexa perked up at that, and nearly lost control of her expression. She needed that money! Her debt was only growing as it was!
“Mr. Manager, please don’t be like that. I’ll do better tomorrow, I promise. But I need my pay–”
“It’s already done, Lhexa.”
With that, he turned and slammed the door.
Lhexa turned and screamed into her pillow. But even now, she only had a little time to rest.
All of this. All of it is boring. All of it should just disappear.
“Hello everyone and welcome to the after show! A special thank you to each and every one of my fans for coming to see me instead of any of the other girls. I guess my spell worked on you huh?”
She winked at the camera. A few little drones were in her room holding cameras at various angles so the fans could get a 360 degree view from their devices at home.
“I’ll be here live answering all of your burning questions and giving away some merchandise! Then all you special pass owners out there can join me as I wind down from the day and even take a bath! Censored, of course. Don’t get your hopes up!”
All of the girls were doing the same in their rooms. Strictly speaking, it was optional. But, they got to keep direct donations, so they were not optional.
Most of the questions were simple. They were mostly questions about her personal tastes and interests. What was a perfect date for her? What did she like to do during her time off? Time off, what a joke. But, she had carefully rehearsed answers to all of them. None of them were true, of course. She had even rehearsed her responses to the invasive or sexual questions, so she could pretend to be flustered or scandalized.
None of it actually touched her. This, like the rest of her life, was a performance. On its own, that wasn’t so bad. Lhexa loved performing. She enjoyed being dramatic. She enjoyed becoming someone else. She loved the art of it. It was what she lived for, and her life as it was was a necessary evil to get into a closed industry.
Sickening. The grinding normality of day to day suffering.
It was wearing her down. The contract she’d had to sign to get even an opportunity to perform was eating her alive. It all started with money. To be able to perform, you had to sign on with an agency. They fronted the money to get you involved. A brain implant if you didn’t already have one, training to be perfect, wardrobe, character writing, room and board, physical and digital protection, and more. Then you could pay it back by working for the agency.
The only problem was, the pay didn’t even cover interest. So, unless you found a way to make even more money than the performances they allowed, you would never pay it off, only sink deeper into debt.
If they no longer wanted you on stage anymore… Well, it could always be worse.
The live show ended, and Lhexa finally found her way to bed. She swallowed a handful of pills in lieu of dinner. Mood stabilizers, antidepressants, diet pills, skin supplements, and more.
Boring. Everything is boring. Suffering is boring. Debt is boring. Living is boring. Dying is boring.
Lhexa entered the Director’s office. Today she’d done a morning show, promoted a cereal, hit the gym and worked out at least longer than Beatrix, practiced the choreography for a new song, did an autograph signing, ate a small salad for lunch while memorizing song lyrics, and finally did her evening performance. Today, she was at 1.2% off perfect timing. So, after getting yelled at by her manager, she found herself here.
The Director was a human man in his 50’s. Technically, that made Lhexa older than him. But, given the differences in how elves aged, she was in the same stage of life as a human in their early 20’s would have been.
While the Director had a name, it was part of the corporate culture to call superiors by their title. Especially if you were talent. So, Lhexa affected her best meek girl impression and addressed him.
“Mr. Director, I’m sorry to bother you. I was told to come here?”
He did not have a friendly face. Lhexa had seen him before, although this was her first time speaking to him directly. He stared at her with a stern expression before directing her to a couch near his desk.
“Lhexa, you owe this agency a great deal.”
This was not a good start. But, maybe she was just in store for being chastised a little.
“Yes Sir. I’m very grateful. I’m sorry for my recent performance. I did better today. I believe I can keep that upward trend.”
He shook his head.
“No. At this rate, you’re not going to be able to pay us back for our investment in you. Even Castella has been managing to keep her mistakes under 1%, and she’s the newest member of Coven. Why shouldn’t I remove you so she can move up?”
Lhexa swallowed hard. For a moment she could feel a cold sweat coming on, but her implant kicked in, regulating the stress hormones in her brain. It was a simple failsafe so that idols wouldn’t lose focus on stage, but now it was helpful in a different way. If you could call it that.
“Sir, I can do better. I’ll train twice as hard. Tomorrow, I’ll do better than Castella. Please give me another chance.”
The director let out an exaggerated sigh. He stood and came around his desk, walking closer until he was standing over Lhexa and looking down on her. She really did not like the look in his eyes. It was predatory.
“I’ll let you stay.”
“Really? Thank you Sir I won’t let you dow–”
His hand touched her breast. Lhexa felt the hair on the back of her neck stand on end, and she looked down in shock.
“But every day you’re the lowest performing member of Coven, you’ll come back to my office, and we’ll find another way for you to pay me back.”
It was so boring.
And this.
Lhexa doubled over in the shower. The water was pouring down around her, although it wasn’t helping all that much. Despite being turned as hot as she could handle it. She pushed her fingers down her throat again. Nothing was really coming up anymore, but she couldn’t let any of that still be inside her. Disgusting. Disgusting. It was disgusting. Let it all come out. The smell of vomit mixed with the hot water, it felt like this memory was being branded into her brain.
This too.
The knock on her door turned out to be Castella. Lhexa was still getting ready for today’s performance, and the interruption wasn’t particularly welcome. But, she liked the newer girl despite herself. She was another hire from the slums, and so Lhexa only hoped the pressure on the other girl was a little lighter.
“Hey Hex, I heard you were having some difficulties.”
Lhexa’s smile faltered.
“Yeah? Oh. No. I’m fine. As fine as any of us. You ought to be worrying about yourself. Today’s a new song. It’s go time! As your senior, I should be wishing you luck, not the other way around.”
She wasn’t totally sure it was convincing, at least to another performer. But, she hoped so. It wouldn’t do to have the newer girl worrying about her.
“Um. Well. Look. I just heard that you’re struggling in the numbers. I have something that might be able to help.”
Castella approached the dressing table and put a closed hand down on it. When she moved the hand, there were three pills. She spoke again.
“Make sure to only take one. If you take it now, it should be hitting you when the show starts. It’ll help. I take them when I’m worried about my performance.”
Lhexa frowned at the girl.
“What is–”
“It’s called Overclock." The words were pouring out of her now, like she couldn't get them out of her fast enough. "It works with your implant. I don’t know exactly what it does, but it makes you way better at things for a little while."
Cast was looking up at her with too-wide eyes, a touch of desperation in her voice. "Take it. The side effects aren't that bad. It'll be worth it. I promise!”
Lhexa sighed, but picked up one of the pills, letting it roll in her palm. It was a friendly blue color. Shiny. It almost looked like candy.
“I don’t think either of us should be taking this.”
Castella reached out and took Lhexa’s hands in hers.
“Please? Please take it? For me? I don’t want you to flunk out. Please. I need you here.”
“I- I didn’t know you felt that way. I’m going to be fine.”
“Please! Just for today, even. I can’t do this if you leave. I can’t be on the bottom!”
Oh.
Of course.
Lhexa took the pill. She threw it up the moment Castella left.
It’s all so–
Lhexa opened the door to the director’s office, and saw the smile on his face.
So disgusting.
Lhexa was getting chewed out for falling asleep during one of her live chat shows. Somehow she had gotten more donations than when she was awake.
It should all just end.
That night, Lhexa had found that her dosages for some of her medications had been increased. Apparently, her implant had noticed recent changes in her brain chemistry, and the pills were meant to keep her balanced in the coming weeks. She took them. It didn’t matter. She had to do the things she had to do either way, so she might as well.
She was getting a call. What a way to wake up on a day with no performance, but it was her manager so she picked up.
“Lhexa, the director wants you in his office today. You have thirty minutes.”
“Yes Mr. Manager. I’ll be right there.”
Internally, she screamed. But, there was nothing else to be done. However, something strange happened. The call didn’t end. Lhexa paused before ending it herself, and just waited.
After a few seconds, she could hear something. Conversation started up, a bit further away in the room. Had the manager forgotten to end the call? She heard the Director’s voice.
“Taken care of?”
“Yeah, she’ll be here in half an hour. Was there anything else you wanted from me, Sir?”
“You already got the financial report done?”
“Yes, Sir.”
“How about performance? Who’s bringing in the most money right now?”
“Beatrix is bringing in the most revenue, Sir. Although, Lhexa’s exhaustion incident seems to have made her a temporary star with the fans. Her personal shows are making more than any of the other girls at the moment.”
“Hmm. That won’t do. Tell her she needs to put more work into choreography for a few days, and make her work on it during those hours. That should get things back to normal.”
“So, don’t let her do her live shows? For how long?”
“It shouldn’t take more than a week.”
Lhexa wanted to scream, but she was frozen stiff. If she made a sound, they might realize the call hadn’t ended. They were sabotaging her? Of course they were. And probably all the other girls too.
An ice cold feeling overtook her body. Of course. Of course. They were never going to let her go. The debt might as well have been made up. What else was a lie? Was she even doing poorly in her performances? She never got to see the numbers herself.
All of it. All of it. None of it had ever mattered.
She couldn’t even remember getting ready. Before she knew it she was opening the door to the Director’s office. There he was, behind the desk, with that same predatory look on his face.
She walked in, and closed the door behind her. She smiled at him. It was easy. She was always wearing faces, so what was one more?
“You know, I’ve been thinking, Mr. Director.”
“What is it, Lhexa?”
“I really haven’t been nearly grateful enough to you for letting me stay on board despite my poor performance. I’m so glad you called me in today. I wanted to change my tone.”
He smiled, and rose from his desk.
“Oh? What did you have in mind?”
Lhexa made a show of walking over to the couch, then she turned and faced him with open arms.
“Why don’t you come over here and let me show you?”
He approached her, sauntering, maybe even strutting. In that moment, she felt like she could see into his soul. The disgusting slimy pit of it. Arrogance beyond arrogance. A predator that took and used, and nothing more.
He reached out to touch her. She smiled up at him. The look of surprise didn’t even come over his face until he hit the floor. Her punch had landed solidly. She dove on top of him, straddling his chest and punched him again. And again, and again and again. She felt the skin and bone that made up his face breaking under her fists. She jabbed her thumbs into his eye sockets and felt her fingers dig into them like cottage cheese. She rose and grabbed the end table from next to the couch, holding it above her head and–
Before she could bring it down, she was tackled.
This too. It’s all so boring. This mundane suffering. Grinding away and away until nothing is left.