LIGHTNOVELONLINE [Vol. 1 pt. 27]
Standing in front of me was the exact kind of guy who I really hoped that my little sister wasn’t dating.
The likable kind who had nothing immediately wrong with him. That meant I would have to try and go out of my way to find something about him to dislike.
He was tall, though shorter than me. Almost the same style of short and black hair as me. A bit more muscular, but the same general frame. In fact, he looked a lot like me in more than one way. I almost felt as if I was looking at a younger, slightly more muscular version of myself.
Naturally, the first thing that came to mind was the opportunity to tease my little sister about how she picked herself a boyfriend who looked similar to me. There was probably something Freudian that I could use to tease her.
But Freud was a piece of shit who didn’t deserve to be brought up just to tease my little sister. More importantly, I knew better than anybody else that my sister did not have some sort of hidden complex when it came to me. Besides, I could be nice and not weird right after seeing her for the first time in months.
“Hah, wow, it’s like I’m looking in the mirror,” her boyfriend said.
I couldn’t help it. I smiled. I knew that any comparison of us was going to drive her crazy and, going by how her green eyes widened as she must have been resisting the temptation to smack him, she was definitely annoyed.
“It’s true,” Mom said. “Is there something you’d like to tell us, Rachel?”
“Mom!” my little sister, Rachel, shouted which got the attention of more than a few diners and restaurant staff.
After I went through all the trouble of being a good older brother and resisting to tease my little sister, her own boyfriend and our mom went and did it anyways.
However, this was a problem.
It made her boyfriend even more likable.
The good news was that Rachel’s little outburst got us the attention of somebody who took us to a booth.
After helping Mom into the booth, I sat down next to her and across from my little sister. “Long time no see, Rachel. Well, it’s been a long time since I’ve seen you. I guess you see me a lot more frequently,” I said to finally join in on the teasing.
I was suddenly kicked very hard in my shin underneath the table. I did deserve it, though.
“I knew this would happen,” Rachel groaned. “I knew it. I knew it.” Her hands looked ready to tear her hair out, or perhaps only ready to yank her ponytail off.
More surprising than the similarity between her boyfriend and me was that she finally stopped trying to dye her hair different colors. She finally joined me in leaving our hair black as it naturally was rather than trying to be blonde or redheaded.
There was also that time she went for a rainbow color.
“I was right. I knew I was right,” Rachel said, turning to look at her boyfriend. “You should have worn a mask. Like a gorilla mask or something.”
“I thought that was only for roleplay?” her boyfriend asked.
I heard another kick under the table. That time, I wasn’t the one being kicked.
“I know what you’re doing,” Rachel said. “You’re kissing up to him. I never should have told you anything about him.”
That made me curious. “Oh? What’s my little sister telling people about me?” I asked.
“Hah, well, she might have told me that you have a habit of scaring off her boyfriends that you don’t like, and she showed me your channel online. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t trying to impress you a bit,” the boyfriend explained.
“I see how it is,” Mom joined in. “Back in my day, it used to be us mothers who everybody tried to impress.”
“A-aha, sorry. Wait, I haven’t introduced myself, have I? Sorry. My name’s Reid.”
“And I’m sure you know my name already if you’ve seen my channel,” I said.
Reid nodded before turning his attention to look at Mom.
“You can call me… whatever you feel like,” Mom answered, continuing her personal little game of never giving anybody but the government her name to see how people would react.
“I guess I’ll have to stick to Mrs. Fletcher then,” Reid said.
That was the boring, but safe, response. If he would have tried to call her “Mom” or anything, that would have annoyed me.
And it looked like Rachel might have given him that information since she looked at me and sighed.
What? Was I supposed to be fine with random guys I barely know calling my mom “Mom?” Not only was I admittedly jealous when it came to Mom, but it implied that any of her boyfriends who said it were going to be marrying her.
And that definitely wasn’t going to happen.
At least not until she found somebody who was actually good enough for her.
Then again, with how much of a little shin-kicker she was, maybe she didn’t deserve anybody as good as I wanted for her.
And then I felt my phone buzz in my pocket. I wasn’t going to check it because I had a strict rule about never being on the phone when out with others, but it was usually important if somebody actually messaged me. It was either one of my moderators informing me of a problem with my online content or community, or… yeah, they were pretty much the only ones who ever messaged me.
Well, there was somebody who I added on Fiscord earlier in the day – before going out with Mom.
I’d have to check if I ever needed to go to the bathroom. Whether it was related to that certain somebody or my “business,” time with Mom and Rachel was more important.
Plus my true test for Reid had yet to come. I still had to evaluate his potential as a boyfriend of Rachel’s.
Then I realized that both of their names start with R.
Rachel. Reid.
R&R.
I was in full support of that abbreviation which made me even more suspicious of him.
“So, Reid, my little sister here has told you about me and her past interests, right?” I asked.
“Most of them, I think,” Reid answered.
“Then you know that I have to test you. Every time I meet one of her boyfriends for the first time, I have a test for them.”
“Oh god,” Rachel said.
“I – I haven’t heard of any tests,” Reid said.
“It’s true. He always comes up with some stupid ‘test.’”
I crossed my arms over my chest and held my head up high, clearly very proud of myself as our drinks arrived.
“Figure out what you’d like or do ya need a few more minutes?” our waitress asked.
“We still need a few more minutes,” I answered, “but could you bring us a dozen chocolate milkshakes?”
“A – a dozen chocolate milkshakes?’
“A dozen chocolate milkshakes.”
“Alright… anything else?”
“That’s all for now. Thanks.”
The waitress looked pretty suspicious of my request, but she went off to get the milkshakes without any issue.
Mom laughed and sighed at what she knew was about to happen.
“Please no,” Rachel said. “Don’t subject my boyfriend to the same stupidity that you and Dad went through.”
“It’s a test. If he can defeat me, I won’t have any issues with him.”
In all seriousness, my standards for Rachel’s boyfriends were pretty low.
One, don’t be an asshole.
Two, respect her.
Three, respect our mom.
Four, tolerate me picking on them for the first meeting.
Even the fourth one wasn’t that important. I just wanted to know if I’d be able to be friends with them or not. The first three were the only ones actually important.
And so far, Reid seemed like he was going to pass all four of those qualifications.
When our milkshakes arrived a few minutes later, the waitress placed our milkshakes down on the table one at a time as some of the other staff looked on from a distance. They were suspicious, but they weren’t interfering.
“Are you ready to order?” our waitress asked.
“Thanks for the milkshakes, and I think so,” I answered. “Mom, what do you want?”
We went around the table ordering our meals. Mom asked for a steak with fries, Reid got a variety of breaded seafood, and Rachel ordered an oversized burger. Naturally, I copied what Rachel asked for since I knew she always managed to pick out the most delicious items on a menu. ((This series is only officially posted to: scribblehub.com, acearriande.com, and patreon.com/acearriande. If you are reading this series on any other website, please send me an email at acearriande.dmca@gmailcom. I will not be able to continue posting my stories for free if my series continue being uploaded without my consent to other platforms. If you have paid money for this on Amazon, email me, file a report, and request a refund as it has been stolen and illegally published.))
Ever since we were kids, I was always jealous of whatever she ordered. She always managed to order food that was better than mine, so I always wanted to pick from her plate. That was why I started to copy whatever she ordered instead.
I never even had to look at the menus myself. I got whatever she wanted and that was that.
If she wasn’t around, I just got whatever she ordered the last time.
Once our orders were placed, it was time for the test to begin.
“Alright, Reid. You listening?” I asked.
“With both ears,” Reid answered.
“You see all these milkshakes? Me and you, we’re going to see who can drink the most.”
I positioned all but one of the milkshakes right in the center of the table, an equal distance between each of us. “Whoever drinks the most win. First to six. If you reach the sixth but can’t finish it, I’ll take the milkshake I left out and see if I can finish it.”
“That’s… I’m not sure if half a dozen milkshakes are going to go well with my food, and I ordered a big meal.”
“You don’t have to do it if you don’t want to,” Rachel told him.
“If you want to admit defeat by default, she’s right,” I said.
“You’re not going to beat him at anything involving sucking.”
Mom and I snerked at that, causing Rachel to glare at us.
“I… I feel like I have to try,” Reid said.
“Good man,” I replied. “You ready?” Reid nodded and looked at the milkshakes. “Mom, count down for us. We’ll go at zero.
“Five,” Mom counted, “four… three… two… one………. twenty-nine… zero!”
Reid and I reached for the nearest milkshake and got to drinking. Some of the staff and other diners watched as he devoured milkshake after milkshake, especially with how loud Reid was about it.
That was the first thing that I disliked about him. He was a very loud sucker. I knew how to suck while ignoring my gag reflex, and I could do so quietly. Reid, on the other hand, almost sounded like somebody trying to suck a cock while jacking it off with a grapefruit.
One by one, the amount of milkshakes decreased on the table, and it was clear who was going to win.
Me, of course.
I was halfway done with my third milkshake when he was only getting to his second milkshake.
It was then that I realized… he probably planned on me winning. That was smart. One, it was letting me assert dominance over him in the field of milkshake drinking. Two, by not trying to win, he would drink less of the chocolate milkshakes which would give his stomach more room for all of the seafood that he ordered.
That was no fun.
I finished my third milkshake and didn’t take a fourth. “I’ll let you catch up. It’ll be more exciting if I give you a chance,” I said.
I knew it. The instant he heard my words, he suddenly looked far more concerned with the situation.
He wasn’t willing to say that he planned on letting me win from the start.
The test continued.
When he finally caught up, he already wasn’t looking too hot, but he went for a fourth milkshake and so did I.
Fortunately for him, I decided to show mercy by quickly finishing the fourth, moving onto the fifth, and finally taking the sixth for victory.
Before I could even announce my victory, Mom reached over to grab one of the leftover milkshakes for herself and Rachel did the same.
“I win,” I declared after one final swallow.
The staff who were watching us looked relieved that we didn’t do anything weird with the milkshakes. They were probably more concerned about us trying to “epically prank” them with the milkshakes than one of us potentially throwing up from drinking too many. The few kids who were watching us looked impressed and wanted to try it, and their parents looked annoyed that Reid and I were being such good examples of adults to their children.
“And now, I have to go to the bathroom,” I said. “Good job on the test. You pass.”
Reid gave me a thumbs-up, too bloated by milkshake to say anything.
Rachel rolled her eyes as Rachel tended to do.
Once I was done in the bathroom and washed my hands, I pulled out my phone to check on who it might have been that messaged me earlier.
Surely enough, I had a Fiscord notification. And just as I had hoped, it was from the one who I added to my friends on it earlier.
I opened up the conversation tab with her and was immediately met with a very, very nice picture – the kind of picture that made both my heart and my dick throb. If I wasn’t out with Mom and Rachel, I would have went back into the stall to rub one out to the picture. Especially since I had a feeling that the sender of said picture would be hoping to have that sort of effect on me.
Lily. Lily sent me a picture of herself. She was lying on her bed with her virtual reality headset next to her, her shirt had a low enough cut that there was plenty of her breasts to see which took up most of the picture, and she had cute little whiskers and cat ears drawn over her. Such a thing provided a very strong contrast against how much she was blushing in the picture. It was like she wanted to take some stereotypical cutesy picture and edit it with the cat features, but just the thought of it was extremely embarrassing to her.
And there was a caption, too.
“I went online hoping you would be there even though I knew you wouldn’t be v3v.”
My heart, and dick, throbbed again. I wanted nothing more than to hug her through the screen before proceeding to paint her tits and face with my cum.
“God, you’re perfect,” I said.
“S-sorry?” some random guy standing in front of me said.
“Oh, my bad. A perfect girl sent me a picture,” I explained and stepped aside so that he could get past me.
“Right…”
He might have felt awkward, but I didn’t think there was anything awkward at all about pointing out Lily’s perfection out loud.
Now, Mom and Rachel might have been waiting for me, but I couldn’t just go back to them without trying to repay Lily at all for the amazing gift
That was why I sent her a response asking her if she wanted a quick dick pic.
It was very important to always ask somebody if they wanted a dick pic before sending one, unless they were the one who asked for one in the first place.
Just as quickly as I sent back the message, I received a reply featuring a blushing anime girl and then another one of a blushing anime girl shyly nodding her head.
I wanted to see Lily nod her head like that, but some random anime girl doing it was good enough.
I returned to a bathroom stall and got to work. As soon as I was fully erect, which was easy with the help of the picture she sent me, I took a picture of my pride and sent it to her.
Part of me was hoping for a quick response so that I could see her reaction, but I received no such reply. I had to return to Mom and Rachel before I left them waiting for too long, too.
The rest of our meal together was normal. No more tests, no more teasing my sister about having a secretive brother complex, and there was—fortunately—no vomiting of chocolate milkshakes. Reid wasn’t able to finish his food, though, so Rachel ended up helping him.
And, of course, the burger that I copied from Rachel was absolutely amazing.
I also felt my phone buzz a few more times after sitting back down. I couldn’t wait to see what Lily replied with. Admittedly, part of me was nervous. No matter how much pride I might have had in my dick, not to mention the fact that Lily had already seen it if she ever looked up my porn videos, I still felt a bit nervous about her reaction to it.
As for Reid – well, there was nothing that I could find wrong with him. He seemed like a genuinely good guy. He was smart, shared a ton of interests with Rachel, kind – maybe a bit too nice at times, and he was just… overall a pretty chill guy.
So, when we were outside of the restaurant after I paid and gave the waitress a very generous tip for the milkshakes, Reid and I shook hands.
“Think I’m good enough?” Reid asked me with a joking tone.
“Don’t get ahead of yourself,” I joked back.
Meanwhile, Mom and Rachel hugged.
“You need to come home and visit more often,” Mom told her.
“No. Absolutely not. Not after I saw that spider in Damian’s video,” Rachel replied.
“Oh, yeah, I completely forgot about that,” I said.
“Yeah, definitely not coming home anytime soon. Not until you hire an exterminator.”
Mom pouted and tried to convince Rachel to come home sometime, but her efforts were wasted. Reid joined in trying to tell Rachel that he would protect her, but she refused to budge on the matter.
So, while those three talked, I pulled out my phone just to check on it real quick since I had nothing to add to the conversation.
My conversation history with Lily consisted primarily of blushing anime girls. I had to scroll up past quite a few of them before I found an actual text response from her.
“I… I couldn’t help it after seeing it… mon maître.”
That was the text response.
Then I noticed there was another picture directly above it.
It was a picture of her bed and there was one particular section of her sheets that was thoroughly soaked.
The implication made her even more perfect, and I was absolutely going to tease her about making such a mess all on her own all over a single dick pic.
