Elegy for a Star

Gwendolyn had given her holy symbol of Aros away some time ago, to one much more deserving of it. She’d met Citrine in her earlier days at the College and Corps, bonding over their shared devotion for the God of Zeal. Gwendolyn didn’t deserve it now though, just like she didn’t deserve her knighthood.

It was easier because Gwendolyn knew she didn’t deserve it in the first place. She’d gotten her squiredom by royal connection, not by achievement. She wielded it like a social sword of clout rather than following its tenets.

Gwendolyn was never a knight; Now, at least, the rest of the world knew what she’d always known.

This was the first time she’d picked up a weapon since that fight against Admaris. Of course, it wasn’t a real weapon. She wasn’t allowed. Even worse, she wasn’t allowed to practice with anyone. That meant no training courses. No spars. No real practice.

At least she had Tess.

“I’m ready,” Tess said, preparing her wooden knives.

Gwen pointed her sword to Tess’ feet, “Remember your stance. Your feet are too close together. You’ll never keep balance that way.”

“Oh, right,” Tess said, taking a wider stance. If anything, it was too wide, but Gwendolyn didn’t want bother her so much that she quit.

“Are you on attack, or me?” Gwen asked, holding her wooden sword in one hand.

“You,” she responded.

Gwen stepped forward, jabbed with a sword. Tess dodged. She always did. The first strike was easy. The second? Not so much. Gwen twisted her arm and cracked Tess across the thigh.

“Ow,” Tess sighed, rubbing at her leg, “Fuck.”

“Your turn,” Gwendolyn replied, “I’ll defend.”

When they repositioned themselves, Tess lunged forward, sliding through the snow on Gwen’s side. Why does she do that so often? Gwen hopped to the side, even if Tess’ attack was already clumsy. As Tess rose, she flicked an arm and threw a knife at Gwen. She was able to twist to the side enough that the wooden stake only glanced her upper arm.

“Nice!” Gwendolyn replied, nodding her head, “That was the first time you got me.”

“Yeah,” Tess laughed, “I thought that might work.”

“Only problem,” Gwen stepped forward, helping Tess to her feet, “I’d have a little scratch and you’d be down a weapon. Got to hit home with that one or it isn’t worth it.”

Tess nodded her head. The two women stood close to one another, facing each other, looking into each others’ eyes. Tess was so pretty. Those green doe eyes were captivating; her reddened cheeks and the innocent little smile on her face. Gwen loved it all. Tess had a little strand of hair stuck to the sweat on her forehead, slipping down the side of her nose. Gwen reached up, pulling it aside and tucking it behind Tess’ ear.

“Thanks,” Tess replied softly. Gwen knew that the short blonde wanted to kiss her. In truth, Gwendolyn wanted to kiss Tess, too. How could she, though? After what she did? Tess had Mairaela; The Summer Fey would be a much better, worthier match for her. Gwen took a step back, turning away.

She wanted to change the conversation, “Have you heard from Miri yet?”

Tess shook her head, “I haven’t heard her in a while. She’s gone quiet, but never for this long before.” Tess chewed her lip in thought, “Should I be worried? Did she… I don’t know, die somehow?”

“Not sure how she could, without you even noticing. Maybe she’s just… I don’t know. Napping?” Gwendolyn shrugged, “Not sure how much sleep demons need.”

“You know what? Tess mentioned, and Gwendolyn gave her a curious look, “I don’t think she is a demon.” Tess explained, “Demons don’t have gifts, and Miri has two.”

“Right. ‘Performance.’ Honestly, last time I saw the two of you… you know, I’d say that you were the one with the sex gift,” Gwen replied, “Here, get your weapon, let’s keep working.”

Tess was grinning at Gwen’s comment as she went to get her knife. She was happy that she could make Tess smile still. Tess treated Gwendolyn as if nothing happened. Gwen wasn’t sure if that was better or worse than Tess hating her. She wanted punishment. She did something terrible and dangerous to an ally in the Corps. Was that what she did to Madame Pava? Tess looked to be in rough shape, but maybe Pava was helping her. Gwen killed her in a fit of rage, just like she tried to do to Admaris.

The thought formed a pit in Gwendolyn’s stomach.

Before she knew it, Tess was rushing her again. Wasn’t it Gwendolyn’s turn? Oh well. This time, she didn’t slide, but she did leap. It was clumsy still, and Gwendolyn simply put her blade in Tess’ way. Unable to maneuver in the air, Tess landed chest first into Gwen’s blade. Were it a real sword, she would’ve been impaled, depending on her armor.

“Why do you do those things?” Gwen asked.

“What things?

“The leaps. The slides. They’re impractical and you’re wasting your balance and effort.”

Tess shook her head, “I’ve seen them. They’re good.”

Gwen looked dubious, “Seen them where?”

“You’re just going to think I’m crazy.”

After the way in which she met Tess, Gwen knew that anything could happen around this girl. “Just tell me,” Gwen said, rolling her hand in the air.

“I’ve been having these dreams,” Tess explained, “And I know what you’re thinking, but they’re more than dreams. They’re so vivid. I can feel the exhaustion. I can feel the wind. I can… I can feel the emotions and the pain. I am the person in the dream.”

“Who’s the person in the dream?” Gwen asked. To her surprise, this was equally as unbelievable as anything else Tess has done or said.

“That one Heroic Divine; Krahe.”

Gwen cracked a smile.

“See? I knew you’d think I was just crazy.”

Gwen shook her head and held up her hands, “Sorry, it’s just… how? Why?”

“I don’t know, but… I’ve had the dreams ever since Madame Pava did whatever she did.”

Gwen nodded. She remembered that part.

“It took me a while to remember, but she said she was folding my soul, to look back at past or future me’s.” Tess explained.

The thought dawned on Gwendolyn before Tess had to explain, “You think you’re Krahe? Just… reincarnated?”

Tess nodded her head, “I was fighting with Howlcrag not long ago and I could do everything that Krahe did in my dream. I beat him. Again and again, I could beat the Sergeant, and it wasn’t even a difficult fight.”

“Can you do it now?” Gwen asked.

“Probably,” Tess replied, “But Miri said it was dangerous.”

‘Yeah, well, Miri put an arrow through Mairaela’s throat.”

Tess opened her mouth, but Gwen shut her down with a chuckle, “Don’t you dare say it.”

Tess smirked and closed her mouth, “Alright.”

“In any case,” Gwendolyn replied, “Miri isn’t always right. We should give it a shot. You never know if you might need it, dangerous or not.”

Tess nodded her head and whispered to her knives, “Born from blood…”

Gwen raised an eyebrow. She shrugged and said, “It’s my turn, right?”

Tess nodded and Gwen approached with a calm, balanced stance. When she got close, Tess jabbed at her with a blade, so Gwen used her more impressive reach to swing vertically toward Tess’ shoulder. The young woman slipped to the side, bringing up a boot and kicking Gwendolyn’s grip. Gwen was too skilled to lose her hold on her blade, but it did delay her.

In the time it took to bring her blade back toward Tess, the woman had mocked a series of slashes all over Gwendolyn’s weak points. Gwen was so baffled and surprised that she couldn’t muster words. She only stared blankly at the grinning Tess.

“My turn,” Tess said.