Chapter 12: Memories
"I'm sorry, son. If only there could be another way."
A voice rang in Tom's ears. His consciousness started to return.
"If I won't come back in two years, then you will have to be the one to find me," the voice of Tom's father sounded in his mind. The voice which he forgot.
'What the hell was that,' Tom asked himself, slowly prying his eyes open.
'My main avatar is gone. Claudia is stuck way too deep to survive on her own, and now those memories?' Tom's thoughts ran awry. His own issues were already overwhelming, and now this strangely hidden burden suddenly surfaced.
Pst...
The hydraulics of the capsule gave a noise when the lid automatically moved up. Mechanism detected the loss of the avatar and now was urging Tom to get the fuck out.
In the end, no matter who he was before, now he was a nobody.
'Thankfully, I still have my other one in another hub.' Tom forced his thoughts on the positive track. If he were to dwell on the loss he just suffered, he wouldn't end well.
Especially with those foreign yet familiar memories overwhelming his mind.
Tom slowly exited the capsule. The touch of the blanket he wrapped around his body was different from before.
For the last seven years, he would cover himself with it to rest after growing his avatar even stronger than before. In the last few days, it would mean a job well done and a neat sum transferred to his account.
Yet now it was a goodbye.
'I was stuck here only because of the school,' Tom thought, still forcing all the strange thoughts away. 'I guess a slight change of pace won't be that bad,' he added after a moment.
Tom looked around as he continued his walk of silent shame towards the exit. Somewhere deeper in the room, Claudia was still struggling to save her avatar.
'No. No matter what I do, it won't do anything,' Tom thought grimly before pushing the doors open and leaving.
Walking through the corridor of the Hub in just a towel wasn't something unusual. In fact, quite a lot of players got used to this situation. In a sense, this simple, white towel turned into a quasi-official suit for them!
'I know I'm not drawing any attention, but still,' Tom thought, forcibly finding topics to hang his thoughts on. His heavy steps carried him forward.
'Just a little more,' Tom encouraged himself, finally reaching the nearest lift. The doors sizzled, letting the young man in. A press of a button later, the quadratic cabin closed again, bringing Tom to the living quarters on the third floor of the compound.
'I need to lie down,' Tom thought to himself, noticing his own fragile state of mind. He managed to push so far only due to the momentum, but his troubles were finally catching up with his psyche.
The elevator doors opened up. Tom used the very last of his strength to push his body forward. A few steps later, he arrived at the entrance of his rented room.
'Good thing I got it for the entire week beforehand,' Tom thought, pushing the doors open. A single step more, and he fell on the bed.
"If I won't come back, you will have to find me." His father's voice sounded in Tom's ears again. And then, as if the barrier finally gave up, all the memories that Tom was trying to keep at bay came flooding.
"Faster!" His father shouted. Tom's muscles were burning as if they were on fire. His mouth full of filth. His eyes could no longer see from under the layer of hardened mud.
"FASTER!" The voice of his father nagged him further. Without any other choice, Tom continued to crawl underneath the obstacles, all the while holding his rifle above the mud to keep it clean.
'FASTER!' Tom thought to himself, forcing his battered body forward.
Skip.
"How was the school?" Tom's father asked. They were sitting at the table back in Tom's countryside refuge. Yet, for some reason, everything suddenly grew big.
"Boring," Tom answered, pushing the potatoes around on the plate with his fork.
"Ha, that was to be expected," Tom's father laughed out before disappearing along with the entire lovely scenery.
"Son, have you ever thought about what might be your purpose?" Tom heard his father's voice, even though his military suit made it impossible to see his face.
Or any part of his body in the first place.
"Aren't I too long for those kinds of questions?" Tom laughed in response before wiping a tear from the corner of his eyes. His heart was stifled.
'I made my decision,' Tom thought, holding back the flood of tears. Only his will was stopping the young man from breaking down in tears.
"Too young?" Tom's father asked, leaning his head forward before placing his fists on his sides and laughing up. "That's a good one!"
Even though his face was hidden behind the face mask of his helmet, Tom could still picture his father's joyful expression.
"I should be going." After a moment of silence, Tom's father said.
"Off you go, then," Tom replied with a fake smile.
"Before I go though, I want to check one last time." Tom's father's voice turned serious, as if only now did he acknowledge the weight of the situation.
The massive, dark mass of the portal continued to fluctuate. The lights of their farm flickered in the distance.
"What do we do, and why do we do it?" The voice of Tom's father changed. As if this simple question was a rite of sorts, a strange, unearthly aura surrounded Tom's father.
"We save, we condemn. We conquer, and we free. We maintain and uproot. All because we are sons of,"
Tom opened his eyes. The sweat trickling down his forehead already made the pillow wet. Just those few snapshots of his memories returning were more than enough to throw a wrench in Tom's common sense.
He raised his eyes at the small window hidden in the corner of the room. A single question prevailed in Tom's mind.
"We are the sons of... who?"