Dungeons Are Bad Business

Do returned twenty minutes later with a bag full of crystals that were chipped, cracking, or otherwise in need of repair. Along with it, the fiend also carried a list showing the locations each one had come from. Vee studied it with Hanako, silently impressed at the quality of the fiend’s penmanship. He wasn’t sure when or how his [Dungeon Maintainer] practiced, but he was himself more than a little jealous of the perfect size and spacing of the letters in front of him, and resolved to gift Do with some proper paper and maybe a nice fountain pen or two in the near future. Such nice writing deserved the proper materials with which to really shine.

Hanako rubbed her chin, hemming and hawing as she jotted down notes of her own about the repairs.

“This shouldn’t take too long to fix,” she said once they were done. “Most of the crystals just need a bit more etching or another polish. I’ll get started right away and should have them ready in a couple days.”

“Hang on,” Vee said as she went to get up. “It’s mostly only the fire crystals that need to be repaired, right? Why don’t we just replace them with ice traps instead?”

He was thinking about the dungeon’s theme. Now that Alforde had gotten an ice-based class, he felt as if he should start tailoring Crestheart to his [Dungeon Champion] a little bit more than he had been. Ghosts and ice went together well, didn’t they? It was certainly more cohesive than the random mishmash of elements he was currently using, and if he ever wanted to be a proper dungeon, he’d need to start making decisions about how to shift over that way eventually. Might as well start now.

Of course, doing that would take time and might not be as easy as simply willing it to be done. The biggest obstacles would be swapping the fire elementals out for ice elementals, and replacing the fire slimes in the pit traps with ice slimes. Once he had some ice slimes, that was.

Mental note: talk to Kai about feeding some of the slimes in the menagerie ice crystals or elementals to see if they start turning into ice slimes.

“Are you sure?” Hanako asked as she scooped up the bag of fire crystals and folded up her list. “What should I do with these then?

Vee shrugged.

“Keep them down in your workshop for now. I’m sure we’ll find a use for them sooner or later. For now, I’d like you to focus on making simple, slippery frost tiles, okay?” he said. “If the adventurers challenging Crestheart have a tough time keeping their footing as they travel from one room to another, we might luck out and get some free injuries that we don’t have to pay for with minions.”

[Devious Mind +1]

Hanako shrugged. “That’s true, I guess. Okay, I’ll start making the replacements, but just so you know, ice crystals take a little longer than fire crystals. The enchantments need to solidify.”

“That’s fine,” said Vee. “We’re not really in any sort of rush.”

After his intern left, Vee returned his attention to counting up the day’s shards of chaos. [Boost Drops] was really speeding up the rate at which they were coming in, with the dungeon acquiring seventeen after the day’s runs. The total was now a hundred and fifteen, which was drawing quite close to the two hundred and fifty needed to add another floor to the dungeon. Unfortunately, he’d have to spend a few to replace the minions lost in all the runs, but he was going to hold off on doing that until he got the last shipment he’d ordered. There was no point in spending his precious shards of chaos on minions that might takes weeks or more to arrive. Stupid bandits disrupting commerce!

While he worked, Vee couldn’t help but notice the great fat snowflakes falling from from the sky. If the ink wash blue sky was any indication, this time around the snow was going to stick for sure.

That sent Vee’s mind wandering. If the experience with the bugs had taught Vee anything, it was that the streets of Oar’s Crest would be a nightmare if there ended up being a lot of snow. He decided to be proactive about making sure that it would stay easy for adventurers to reach the dungeon, so he reached through his bond to Do again.

“Sorry for bugging you again so soon,” Vee said. “[Would You Kindly] bring me up a trio of the fire slimes from the pit room?”

“Of course, Master. I’ll have them right up.”

While he waited, Vee shaped some ectoplasm into leashes as Alforde walked up the stairs. Once again, the armorsoul was covered in a sheen of ice that he banished as he entered the office and sat down next to Vee.

“Doing something with the slimes again?”

Vee nodded and gestured out at the snow, explaining his plan.

“Are you going to use them to clear the city streets beyond the gate too?” Alforde asked. “I think people would really appreciate it.”

Vee hadn’t really thought that far, but now that he did so, why not take the slimes into the city once again? He doubted the council had any sort of plan to help make sure that people were able to go about their daily lives as much as possible if the snow got to be too bad, so why shouldn’t he step up and fill the gaps?

In times like this, the people of Oar’s Crest deserve better than to be left fending for themselves.

Something that sounded like shutting a window just a tad too hard echoed in the back of his skull, but other than a brief flicker of recognition, he didn’t pay much attention to it.

[Indeed.]

[Citizenship +2]

[Failed to receive quest! Reason: Citizenship too low (Requires 20 points!)]

“I know, I know. I’m getting there,” Vee said as he dismissed the notification with a loud sigh. Talk about another popup he wouldn’t miss seeing. He just had to find some way to get another two points and he’d finally figure out what the quest itself actually was. The suspense was killing him.

A little later, Do returned to the office with the slimes in hand, and Vee gave them a careful examination. They were still pretty small, overall, but their bodies glowed with red energy and occasionally sent bits of steam into the air. Vee didn’t much like the thought of trying to stick his hands into them to fasten their leashes in place, so he had Alforde do it.

The armorsoul’s gauntlets hissed as the frostnickel made contact with the slimes, but neither his friend nor his minions showed any sign of being in pain. However, the [Dungeon Master] noticed that the slimes had grown slightly dimmer. Their powers dulled when exposed to cold things, it seemed.

That realization threatened to throw a wrench into Vee’s plans, but not such a big one that it couldn’t be dealt with. After thanking Do, Vee put Reginald on and told Alforde to follow him down to Hanako’s workshop.

It turned out that they needed the fire crystals once again.

***

Hanako was focused on the blue crystal secured in the third hand on her desk. Looking at it through a jeweler’s loupe, the girl carefully drew a sharp pattern on its top face before rotating it forty-five degrees and drawing another one on the next face. She worked with a steady, practiced cadence, occasionally sticking her tongue out a little bit when she needed to draw a tricky line.

She noticed them when she turned the crystal for the second time, and carefully set her brush down before stretching her neck and shoulders.

“What’s up, guys?”

Vee smiled and pointed at the bag of fire crystals on the ground next to her desk. “Mind if we take those with us? It’s snowing pretty bad out there, and we’re going to try and use some fire slimes from the dungeon to melt the snow and keep the streets clean. But, touching cold stuff cools them down, so we’re going to feed the crystals to them so they stay hot.”

Hanako shrugged and kicked the bag across the floor. “Fine by me. I wasn’t looking forward to [Disenchanting] them all by hand. If you’re going to be feeding them to the slimes though, want me to give you some more, though? I have loads of chips and scraps saved and nothing to do with them.”

“You do? That’d be great, actually. I’d be happy to take them,” Vee said.

Hanako got up and walked over to a drawer on the far side of the room. When she opened it, Vee saw a veritable trove of crystal slivers that all glimmered with red energy. There were other drawers next to it. Were they all filled with cutoffs and scraps?

The girl scooped up a few handfuls and poured them into another bag, which she handed to Vee.

“I don’t know anything about slime metabolism, but I’m guessing these probably won’t be as strong as a full crystal. However, I’d be willing to bet that they’re digested a lot faster. Mind if I check?”

“Go ahead.”

Kneeling down, Hanako picked up a few splinters and dropped them into her palm, which she held out to the slimes. Like hungry cats smelling scraps of chicken, they all moved toward her, and the girl put the crystals down before the minions’ fiery bodies made contact with her bare skin.

Sure enough, the slimes looked a bit brighter as soon as they gobbled down the shards, and Vee thanked Hanako before giving Alforde the bags to carry down the rest of the stairs.

“If the weather starts looking too bad, you can go ahead and leave early,” Vee called back to Hanako as they left. “We have enough functional traps for tomorrow’s runs.”

“Okay,” said Hanako. “I’ll probably leave after I finish this one then. I want to ask my dad for some tips about making sure that ice is slippery enough.”

***

Outside, Vee, shivered like mad as the icy wind cut into his cheeks and ears. It was beyond time for him to get a scarf. Or a warmer hat to wear underneath Reginald.

“It’s really not that bad out here,” Alforde said with a shrug when Vee complained about getting hit by another chilly breeze. “I barely feel the cold at all.”

The slimes blarbled and trembled at the ends of their leashes. They clearly didn’t agree with the armorsoul’s assessment. Before long, their color faded to a pinkish gray and Vee suspected that he’d be out of crystals in no time at all if he tried to feed his way through the snowstorm.

Instead, he had to protect them from being battered by the snow. Pinching his thumb and forefinger together, Vee activated [Shape Ectoplasm]. All his work on the sponge was paying dividends. Grabbing great handfuls of the energy in the air around him, Vee bent it into three boxes of hardened ectoplasm. Attaching them to the leashes of his slimes, Vee gave each of his minions a little movable shelter that protected them from the chill. Once he was sure that his efforts weren’t going to be immediately overcome, he fed them some crystal scraps to renew their energies.

The boxes worked well, and the hissing sound of snow melting beneath the slimes was music to Vee’s ears as they slowly headed toward the gate, leaving a strip of clear, dry ground in their wake. The snow would cover it again before too long, but that was fine. This was simply a first test. Once the snow stopped falling, it’d only take another lap to clear the street properly. Additionally, depending on how many crystals it took to keep the slimes going in the cold, he’d probably have to try and find another source of fuel for their inner fire if the minions were going to clear the city streets.

“What do you guys think?” Vee asked as they reached the patchwork gate and looked around. “Pretty nifty, right?”

“The slimes do an admirable job of melting the snow, but if you’re serious about clearing the main streets of Oar’s Crest, you’re going to need a lot more slimes and people to handle them,” Reginald said. “There’s no way we can do it with just these three and you two.”

“Yeah,” said Alforde. “That took longer than I thought it would.”

“Agreed, but where can we get more people?” Vee asked. “Sadly, I think this is going to be too big of a job for us to rely on our usual crowd.”

Reginald shifted atop Vee’s head and though the [Dungeon Master] couldn’t see it, he got the distinct impression that the hat was smiling.

“Well, if you’re looking for a bigger group, we could always place a request at the adventurer’s guild.”

“I’d rather not,” said Vee. “We don’t really have the fleurs to pay a reward.”

“We might not have to,” Reginald said. “Or at least, we might not have to pay in fleurs. We can offer discounted runs of the dungeon to those adventurers who offer to help out, and I’m sure that just like with the bugs, we’d get plenty of money from other business owners and citizens for cleaning up.”

Another soft clunk sounded in Vee’s skull, and he looked up at the sky. The snow looked like stars, and Vee thought it was beautiful.

“We’ll do that then,” he said. “Tomorrow before the dungeon opens we’ll go to the adventurer’s guild and put up a job.”

Main Character Sheets:

Vee Vales

Primary Class: Ghost Maestro (Locksmagister University), Level 28

Secondary Class: Dungeon Master (Oar’s Crest), Level 17

Tertiary Class: Guy-Who-Takes-Things-WAY-Too-Far (Self), Level 5

Might: 11

Wit: 29

Faith: 20

Adventurousness: 6

Ambition: 12

Plotting: 15

Charisma: 10

Devious Mind: 19 (+1)

Leadership: 15

Guts: 11

Intimidating Presence: 8

Citizenship: 18 (+2)

Public Relations: 4

Alforde Armorsoul:

Primary Class: Hammer Afficionado (Self), Level 20

Secondary Class: Right-hand man (Vee Vales), Level 12

Tertiary Class: Dungeon Champion (Oar’s Crest), Level 13

Additional Class: Glaciernaut (Sacha Silverblade), Level 2 (+1)

Might: 35

Wit: 11

Faith: 24

Adventurousness (Bound – Vee Vales): 8

Endurance: 16

Intimidating Presence: 11

Heart of a Champion: 6

Citizenship (Bound – Vee Vales): 7 (+1)

Vigilance: 5

Reginald:

Primary Class: Core Spirit (Unknown), Level ???

--~%@(%$@ &% (*$ #&#e !i$$ (#$%#$%#$@!)~--, #$v@& ????

Secondary Class: Loudmouth (Self), Level 39

Tertiary Class: Majordomo (Vee Vales), Level 12 (+1)

Additional Class: Announcer (Vee Vales), Level 6

Might: 1

Wit: 30

Faith: 10

Ambition: 25

Greed: 21

Deceptiveness: 28

Manipulativeness: 35

F^#$#$%@#

Loyalty: 44 (+1)

Patience: 12

[#@$%%^*!#@__--#%]

Citizenship (Bound – Vee Vales): 5 (+1)