Appear Strong When You are Weak part 2
They somehow managed to keep it together while Miss Verdun carried them all the way to the couch and placed them in the nook. They had hoped to walk out to the couch first, to cut down on unnecessary physical contact.
"Oh, yes, Cordelia asked if you would accept their friend requests." Miss Verdun handed them their pad.
They were hoping that it would have taken longer than that for them to be pressed about it. "Of course, thank you Miss Verdun." Please leave.
"Alright, and don't forget to ask if you need anything, okay cutie?" They gave a nod, too overwhelmed to speak. With a smile and bow, Miss Verdun disappeared.
Their eyes grew bleary. Fighting off tears was becoming frighteningly commonplace.
That was disastrous.
Yet again, they had misjudged the situation and simultaneously over and under-compensated. As a result they had yet again exposed themself to the mercy of Miss Verdun. It was fortunate she didn't seem to desire them personally, but they could not afford to keep making that mistake. Mercy was a shallow well.
The fact that the AI was the one that had shown them the other options also hung over them heavily. Miss Verdun was annoying, but the machine as well? It was bad enough to have to treat it with respect.
But the absolute worst part was the girl in the mirror.
They could hardly think about anything else. She haunted them. She had their hair and their scars and their eyes but everything was softer, fuller, and warmer. Her face didn't carry innocence by any means, but it held content. She filled them with some sort of indecipherable longing. Were they actually able to be her? Stars, it would be obnoxious if Miss Verdun was actually right about them having 'gender issues.'
Maybe it was nothing, just a weirdly timed flare of emotions. They'd been having fluctuating moods all day. Honestly it was unfair that Miss Verdun did that and took advantage of their current state! Not that they were going to complain, the last thing they needed to do was give her more reasons to tease them with pet names. Especially ones like 'princess.'
They tried their best to force the incident out of their mind and opened the communication app, accepting the two friend requests. That out of the way, they navigated to continue their lessons on Affini language. If they could just get a few solid study sessions in, they would at least be able to understand it. Speaking would come later.
They barely got even five minutes into the lesson before several messages dinged through.
[Daze-ee]: YAYAYAYA
[Daze-ee]: HIIII BECJETTTT
[Daze-ee]: ALSO UR HANDLE IS BORING!!
[Daze-ee]: WE NEED TO GET YOU A NEW ONE!!!!
Fantastic. It seemed like making any actual progress was going to have to wait.
[J.Beckett]: There is nothing wrong with my username. It is perfectly fine.
[Daze-ee]: BOOOOOOOOOO
[Daze-ee]: NO!
[Daze-ee]: ITS DORKY!
[Daze-ee]: THIS IS THE COMPACT WE CLOWN HERE
[Daze-ee]: FUN IS MANDATORY!!!!
[Daze-ee]: lol
[J.Beckett]: It's fine. Is there a reason you're typing in all caps?
[Daze-ee]: huh?
[Daze-ee]: Oh yah!
[Daze-ee]: sowwy I just got excited and forgot to turn it off after the first few messages
[Daze-ee]: (mistress ghave me a lot of Class A teehee)
[J.Beckett]: I see. Is there anything you needed? I was a little busy.
[Daze-ee]: with wat??
[Daze-ee]: we don't gotta do anything!
[Daze-ee]: wars over, we lost! XDDD
[J.Beckett]: I was studying the local Affini dialect.
[Daze-ee]: oo ur gonna speak plant?!
[Daze-ee]: that's so cool!
[J.Beckett]: I was focusing on understanding it first, but yes, eventually.
[Daze-ee]: woah!
[Daze-ee]: my friend is so cool!
[Daze-ee]: oh yah!
[Daze-ee]: mistress said we're gonna come over tomorrow!
[Daze-ee]: im gonna teach u about friend stuff!!!!
[J.Beckett]: Something to look forward to I suppose. Did you message me to inform me you'll be coming over then?
[Daze-ee]: ?
[Daze-ee]: I MESSAGED u cuz ur my FRIEND
[Daze-ee]: silly
[Daze-ee]: OMG THAT'S FRIEND LESSON NUMBER TWO!
[Daze-ee]: FRIENDS TALK TO EACH OTHER!
[Daze-ee]: BECKETT TYPE THAT BACK, TYPE 'FRIENDS TALK TO EACH OTHER!'
[J.Beckett]: Friends talk to each other.
[Daze-ee]: YAH!
[Daze-ee]: LOURDER!!!
[J.Beckett]: This is a text format, none of this has sound.
[Daze-ee]: Ur such a goof
[Daze-ee]: anyways I can't wait 2 see you again, Mistress has been helping me make my friend lessons!
[Daze-ee]: I just wanted to say hi before getting into my garden!
[Daze-ee]: I'd send u some pics but I want it to be a surprise when your come over :3c
[Daze-ee]: ily bestie!!! Baii!
Dealing with her in person tomorrow was going to be taxing. Just being around Miss Verdun this much was already starting to wear; they normally had much more time alone than this. Feeling emotionally raw was merely fuel on the flame.
They reopened the lessons and picked up where they left off. Their focus returned uneasily, but soon were able to immerse themselves once again. The Affini language was an oddity- countless reiterations and adaptations, going for an untold amount of time, spread across hundreds of thousands of lightyears. Yet the alphabet was easy to pick up and the grammar felt natural.
The rest of the day passed slowly, their study only interrupted by the occasional check up by Miss Verdun and brief conversation with Daisy. The only truly notable events were lunch and dinner.
Lunch was a rice bowl, with all assortments of fried meats, veggies and sauce. Each bite was a wonderful burst of flavor that played off the rice perfectly. Dinner was heavenly; slow cooked stew slathered over seasoned mashed potatoes, the broth reduced to nearly a gravy. Miss Verdun had to warn them to slow down, lest they choke.
All the while for both meals, Miss Verdun incessantly doted over them. Telling them how 'cute' and 'adorable' they were. They knew that Miss Verdun was merely helping them adjust to this aspect of Affini Culture, but it was still strange. They had managed to force the girl in the mirror into the corners of their mind, but it was during these moments she would come back unbidden. Was that how Miss Verdun saw them?
Miss Verdun helped them down from the table, "There you go petal."
"Thanks, Miss," they replied as they stretched. They were beginning to get used to the Affini's lingering presence and the strange feelings.
She brought out her pad and typed into it- the compiler opening behind her shortly after. From within Miss Verdun retrieved a few small bottles and a towel. She placed the items in their arms, "I'm going to clean up, why don't you go get the bath running and ready dear? I'll be there to help you in a few minutes."
Finally, a straightforward task. They gave a curt salute and marched off. Entering the bathroom, they placed the towel on a low shelf, and the bottles along the rim. The next part was less enjoyable.
"Jess, could you please run the bath for me?"
The AI chimed in, giggling, "Okay, cutie!" Steamy water began to break over the waterfall at the opposite end.
Miss Verdun's teasing was annoying, but after a full day of it, they were already growing accustomed to it. Being nice to the machine was another matter entirely, especially after that stunt earlier. They wouldn’t make the same mistake twice. "Thanks, Jess."
"You're welcome!" The machine cut out.
There was little to do besides get naked and wait while Miss Verdun finished in the kitchen. It was a bit embarrassing that they had been in pajamas all day. They probably could have just compiled something normal, but after the incident they didn't feel up to looking at more clothes. Miss Verdun didn't comment on it at least, so maybe it was fine?
Standing there, nude and alone in a bathroom bigger than most Accord housing units, an uneasy feeling crept in. The water trickled to a stop as it filled to the brim of the tub, steam pouring off its surface and fogging the room. They caught movement in the corner of their eye and whipped around, finding themselves face to face with the girl from the mirror.
They flinched, and so she did. They blinked, and she was gone, in her place their own reflection, obscured by the fog on the mirror. Was the machine messing with them? ... The stress must be getting to them.
The door opened. "Okay dear, let's get you in." Miss Verdun approached them. "Dear, are you feeling well? You look a bit pale."
"It's fine, just got a little spooked is all."
"Hmm," Miss Verdun looked them over. "Okay, but if you start to feel like you're drifting off in the tub tell me, alright petal? I'll be right here the whole time."
Normally they wouldn't mind at all, but a nervous feeling kept gnawing at their edges. Miss Verdun was only helping them in and out. She wasn't going to wash them again. It was going to be fine. "Right. Ready when you are." They sighed.
Vines gently picked them up and placed them in the bath, lingering for a moment as their knees buckled under the first touch of the warm water. Their feet under them now, Miss Verdun moved all the products to within arms reach. "Shampoo, conditioner, body wash," she indicated as she set them down. "Of course I'd be happy to wash you, if you asked~"
"Thanks for the offer, but I think I'll pass," they grumbled, taking the shampoo and lathering it in.
"Suit yourself." Miss Verdun shrugged.
They dunked beneath the waters and scrubbed the shampoo out. They rubbed in the conditioner, then took the luffa and began to scrub. Was their frame always this large and square? They felt uneasy, and found themselves thinking about the girl in the mirror. Shutting their eyes and clearing their mind the best they could, they finished the task as quickly as possible.
Dunking under the warm water one last time, they finished the bath. As Miss Verdun lifted them out and handed them the towel, they still couldn't shift their mind off of her.. Their gaze darted over to the mirror when they had seen her twice now- to find the mirrors were dull, and bore no reflection. Disappointment and relief fought in their chest.
"I brought you some new pajamas as well." Miss Verdun's chest opened up, and she retrieved a comfortable looking top and bottom. However, these were a peach color instead of a dusky orange. The floral pattern was apparent instead of subdued, and they had white silk cuffs. They were not only more feminine, but clearly some offshoot of a companion dress.
They ran down the scenario; they could confront Miss Verdun about the design. Then again, the explanation of a 'companion dress' said they are worn by those with an Affini looking after them, not just pets. Miss Verdun was only looking after them for a few weeks, but she was looking after them. They only had so much ground to argue on, best to save it for things like 'feeding themselves’ and 'not getting collared.'
They finished drying off and graciously took the pajamas, "Thanks Miss."
They ruffled through the clothes for the- wait a minute. "Miss Verdun," they huffed, breathing to keep themselves level, "these are not boxers." They held up the offensive item, a pair of sheen black panties.
"Yes, they should offer greater comfort and support." Miss Verdun nodded. "I think you might like them."
Is she fucking with us?
"They're panties." She couldn't be serious, could she?
"Yes, I was aware." Miss Verdun smiled.
Oh stars, she is serious.
"I can't wear panties."
"Surely you can try some different underwear, you already tried far more noticeable things today." Miss Verdun was being particularly insistent; fighting her here was likely to be unproductive in the end. Still, they couldn't just yield; not contesting such a key point would be rolling out the welcome mat.
"Yes and that was a poor experience." They did their best to keep the actual events far away from active memory. That uncomfortable feeling still crept back in.
Miss Verdun contemplated for a moment, "I think you may have tried a bit too much at once. How about we try to go slower?"
"There isn't anything 'slow' about wearing panties to bed."
Miss Verdun paused, lost in thought far longer than before. "In that case, how about as a personal favor?"
A favor? A bit of leverage was exactly what they needed. The thought of actually wearing panties willingly still didn't sit right; it would be ceding ground on the gender stuff, and likely encourage Miss Verdun to pressure them into more, or even or to see them as a pet. However, wasting such a valuable resource simply couldn't be the optimal play. They should secure the offer before Miss Verdun changed her mind.
They sighed, signaling their retreat. "Well, in that case, I suppose I could." There was a gentle gust in the room as Miss drew in air, motioning for them to continue. As if she hadn't made this weird enough... They pulled the underwear on. Shockingly, they actually were more comfortable. Snug but not tight and distractingly soft. They tried not to think about it.
Miss Verdun made an inhuman squealing noise, her vines writhing over one another. "Adorable!" They could feel the blood rush to their face. If they weren't blushing before, they certainly were now.
They turned away and quickly pulled on the rest of the pajamas. "You continue to have strange taste, Miss Verdun."
Miss Verdun giggled. "I suppose. Thank you very much for indulging me, princess~"
If their face could get redder, it did. Hopefully Miss Verdun didn't notice with their back to her. "Didn't I ask you not to say weird stuff?" Their voice kept mostly level, but happily they managed to keep it from cracking.
"Sorry petal, I couldn't resist." Miss Verdun placed a toothbrush and paste in their hands.
They decided to drop the issue; it wasn't worth calling in the favor they were owed. They thoroughly brushed their teeth, and rinsed with what Miss Verdun claimed was only mouthwash. Despite that, it tasted fairly pleasant. Miss Verdun instructed them to spit, and scooped them up into her arms after they did so.
They yelped in shock. "Miss Verdun!"
"Yes, Beckett?" She didn't hesitate, carrying them out of the bathroom.
"I asked you to warn me before picking me up!" Being fresh out of the shower, wearing clothes far softer and far from their norm only amplified how exposed this felt. If they didn't reign that feeling in, they were going to cry again. They focused on their breathing, trying to take slow breaths.
Miss Verdun paused. They could feel her deflate under them. "I'm sorry Beckett, I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable."
They continued to breathe until they were under control again. "Just keep it in mind, alright?"
"Absolutely," Miss Verdun nodded. "Are you feeling better?"
They grumbled, "I suppose. I'd like to just be put down already." The sooner they could be alone in bed, the better.
Miss Verdun moved again, arriving quickly in the guest room. She paused at the bed before setting them down in the center of the giant mattress. She then drew the covers back over them, tucking them in. "There you go."
They tried to ignore the indignity of the treatment in silence.
Miss Verdun merely moved to the exit, pausing in the doorframe, "If you need anything, don't hesitate to call for me, okay?"
"Yes Miss." They answered.
"Goodnight, Beckett." Miss Verdun smiled.
They turned away, "Goodnight, Miss Verdun." The lights went out and the door slid closed. Finally.
What a horrendous day. Outside of all the food, it was a catastrophe. They blundered several times and made sub-par decisions. It was difficult maintaining composure with everything feeling so raw. Miss Verdun was making it worse.
They had done a few bouts of torture resistance training. Hooding, beatings, waterboarding, shocks, knives, sleep deprivation- They had been able to learn how to best adjust to the pain. To take it in without breaking. None of it had prepared them for this feeling in their chest.
It was like an aching all throughout them. An alien tenderness that fluttered in a nauseating manner. They couldn’t identify or fight it. All they knew was if they let it, it would destroy them.
-_-_-_-
Camila's core was still thrumming with delight as she cleaned up for the night, Beckett was so precious! How easily she got flustered! How cute it was when she did! The way she put on the panties just for her! She would have to watch the video for at least an hour before truly lying down.
Camila would have to think of a better name for her. That is- a way to help her find a better name. She was getting a bit ahead of herself. She still needed to help Beckett. Poor dear was confused and struggling to accept it.
How to get Beckett to accept the Class G was its own issue. The sooner she started, the better. The little seed may just accept it if Camila asked her to. It was more likely that Beckett would be in better control of herself tomorrow though, so she should have a plan. She had already made several mistakes that nearly caused another breakdown. There was also, of course, the matter of breakfast.
Finished tidying up, Camila got to work.