Dial H for Heroics

Jack placed a mana booster around the whole property, so the house and Red’s pool

would both be included. He didn’t know if the dragon boat liked it, but as long as it

wasn’t hurt by the mana being pulled into the yard and house, it should be fine. He

boarded the Enterprise after saying his goodbyes and headed home.

He wondered where Elaine was at the moment. He could catch up with her and enjoy

the rest of the day with mundane things until June and Boim arrived. Then they would

have the send off, and he and Elaine could enjoy some private time.

The next day he could enjoy pushing the kids out of the Enterprise and teaching them

to swim and fish.

He might be able to get Elaine into one of the bikinis so he could admire her from

close by.

He wondered if Lake Myra had monsters swimming around in it. He would have to

keep an eye out and be ready to defend the girls from danger.

If anything happened, Josie would rips his ears off.

“On station,” reported the machine.

“Can you find Elaine, or Aviras?,” asked Jack. “I told her that I would help with the

supply runs.”

“Affirmative,” said the machine. It put a picture of Aviras with Matilda on the big

screen. They were moving fast across the city.

“Can you put me down ahead of them?,” asked Jack.

“Negative,” said the machine. “Transit will render any transport moot by the time you

materialize.”

“I’m better off waiting until they land,” said Jack.

“Affirmative,” said the machine.

“I’m going down to the transporter room,” said Jack. “Send me down as soon as they

stop. I’ll take it from there.”

“Affirmative,” said the machine.

Jack went down to the transporter room. He thought about the next things on his

agenda. All he wanted was two more days of peace and quiet. Then he could go back

to war.

He stood on the pad and waited. When the group stopped flying, the machine would

activate. He didn’t have to do anything else unless an alert went out because the

Enterprise had been attacked. He couldn’t see that happening unless a dragon showed

up and tried to take his baby on.

He doubted any reptile could take all of the torpedoes down in the launch bays at one

go. And if it did, he would be glad to interfere in any fight with his watch.

The transporter activated and he was on the yard of the Adventurers’ Hall. He looked

around, but didn’t see the girls. He decided to wander around inside. He wondered

how many were working for the hospital now.

He wondered how much of their cash they were going through to pay the adventurers

as guards and helpers.

Josie could make more if she had to do that. It wasn’t his problem unless she got put

out of commission and the Fasses needed that money for the hospital right away. He

thought he could change things to gold like Josie. He just hadn’t yet.

He did have the Molecule Man on his watch. Of course with his luck, the persona

might only be able to shrink things instead of changing their composition.

He walked down to the training hall. The girls and Caroline were practicing their

moves. Elaine, Emily, Budd, and Case stood to one side. She had Aviras on her

shoulder, letting him watch the training. Sir Harp walked among the Ducklings,

pointing out problems with his stick. He stood behind Elaine and watched over her

shoulder, hands behind his back.

“How much longer do they have?,” Jack asked quietly.

Elaine jumped, and Aviras spun around on her shoulder. A small flame escaped his

snout.

“Don’t set my girl’s hair on fire,” said Jack. He grinned at the adventurers, noting

how they had went for their swords in their surprise. “What are you doing here,

Case?”

“I was collecting my pay, and ran into Thad and Emily,” said Case. He gestured at the

siblings.

“Were you collecting your pay too, Thad?,” asked Jack. He had noted that Thad had

been only watching one of the girls. Maybe Beatrice’s cup had been more right than

they had known. How did he test that? “You can just ask Bea out. It’s not like Josie

will skin you alive and hang your screaming skeleton on her office wall to remind her

every day how she likes to do things.”

“I don’t believe that statement at all,” said Thad.

“Interested, are you?,” asked Emily.

“Maybe,” said Thad. “I don’t think she will be interested in me, and the manager was

courting her. You met him at the party.”

“He didn’t come up to snuff,” said Jack. “You want to take one of Josie’s girls out on

the town, you better come with your heart in one hand, and your tongue in the other.”

“Are you being scary just to be scary, or are you being serious?,” asked Case.

“Yes,” said Jack. “Here, let me show you how it’s done.”

He got down on one knee in front of Elaine. He took her hand. He kissed it lightly.

She smiled at him.

“Elaine, star of the night, rainbow of the day,” said Jack. He wore his serious face.

“Would you grace me with your presence at dinner tonight? It would enhance

everything from the soft candle light, to the well done steak and potatoes, to the soft

music playing in the background. Please say yes because I love you with all my being,

and always will.”

“How can I say no to such a request?,” said Elaine. “I would gladly share everything

with you.”

Jack bounced to his feet. He made a gesture to say that’s how it is done.

“And Beatrice is Caroline’s monitor, so you can arrange a double date as long as Case

can keep his hands to himself,” said Jack.

“I will have to go along,” said Emily. “It’s already bad enough that I have to keep an

eye on this woodchuck, why are you dragging my brother into this potentially

dangerous thing?”

“Woman,” said Aviras. “Do you not know who you are talking to? He only has one

reason for this, and one only. He wants to poke Josie to see what she will do.”

“And if I get killed?,” asked Thad.

“You’re not my friend,” said Jack. He grinned at the younger man. “I will be glad to

drink a beer in your name.”

“Be brave, Thad,” said Elaine. “Don’t let Jack take the decision out of your hands,

and ruin the moment for you. Just ask her. It will make things awkward if she says no,

but at least you tried and can move on to ask some other girl.”

“Be true, buddy,” said Jack. He clapped Thad on the shoulder. “Or you will wind up

like Todd.”

“He got what he deserved,” said Aviras. “I’m glad I set him on fire.”

“So am I,” said Jack.

“Rematch,” called Alicia. She pointed her wooden sword at Jack. “It’s time.”

“No, it’s not,” said Melanie. “I’m not trying to fight anyone.”

“We have adventurers to help us,” said Caroline. She smiled at Case.

“Your girl is trying to get us killed,” said Thad.

“Sure, we’ll help out,” said Case. He smiled back.

“What?,” said Thad.

“Go ahead and get some pads, and helmets,” said Jack. “Caroline, come over here and

cheer your turtle dove on from the sidelines. Beatrice and Emily don’t need the hassle

if you get clocked and they have to explain to Josie what happened.”

“We definitely don’t need that,” said Emily.

“You want in on this, Em?,” asked Jack.

“I think I will watch from the side,” said Emily.

“All right,” said Jack. He went to the storage bin and found a padded chestplate and

helmet to put on. The Ducklings and the older minions pulled their’s on as he sized

them up. He shook his head as he got ready mentally. He wouldn’t be able to play

around with the adventurers on the board. He would have to go for the throat.

“Offense, line up on this end of the mat,” said Harp. He pointed at where he wanted

them to go. “Defense, take the other side.”

“No powers?,” asked Jack. He whisked the practice sword around in the air in front

of him.

“No powers,” agreed Harp. “The rules are the same as last time. Offense has three

minutes to push Defense off the mat. Defense has to defend himself from the group.

Matilda, I would stay at the back if I were you. Is everyone ready?”

“Are you sure you guys want to do this?,” asked Jack. “There’s no shame from

retreating from a superior force.”

“We will win the ice cream this time,” declared Alicia.

“I guess that’s a yes,” said Jack. “When you go down, don’t get back up. I want to

knock this out so we can do the rest of the stuff on our list.”

Elaine motioned Caroline and Emily further back from the mats.

“Ready?,” asked Harp. He held up one hand as he looked at the single fighter against

the mixed group in front of him. He waited for everyone to say ready. He dropped his

hand to signal they should fight.

Jack wasted no time waiting for the group to converge on him. Instead he went right

at Case, sword held in front of him, point pointing at the ceiling. The adventurer

raised his sword in a ready blocking position. Jack shifted, and juked to the outside.

The following exchange of blows dumped Case on Thad, with Jack snatching up his

sword so he had two instead of one.

The next few minutes were a nightmare for the Ducklings and Thad. Jack had two

swords and used one to break defenses while striking with the other. At one point, it

was just him and Alicia, with Matilda using the older girl for cover. The girl grabbed

another sword for her own. They began swinging their swords so fast that the blades

were flickering in the air. The clacking of the exchange sounded like a drunk using

drumsticks on a wooden block.

Jack finally was able to slice a backhand blow through her defenses. He winced as

she fell on her back. He stabbed her with the blunt end two, or three, times to show

he could do it.

“I yield,” said Matilda.

“I’m going to take a minute to catch my breath,” said Jack. He pulled off his

protective helmet. “Thad and Case want to take out Beatrice and Caroline. I am going

to let them talk to Josie about that and practice my dad talk in case she says yes. Thad,

you can go skydiving and fishing with us tomorrow. Gather up your stuff and put it

back in the box. Sir Harp, I am taking the girls out tomorrow so they won’t be here

for practice. I don’t know if anyone told you.”

“Thad wants to take me out?,” said Beatrice.

“Mush,” said Alicia.

“Don’t be jealous, Number Two,” said Jack. “By the time you get a boyfriend, I will

have my dad talk perfected. Now go ahead and clean up.”

Aviras landed on Thad’s puffy hair. He leaned over to look the adventurer in the eye.

“Now do you understand the monster within?,” the dragon asked. “I suggest you gird

up your loins and tell Beatrice something kind and lovely.”

He flew off to land on Matilda’s head, and gave directions.

Jack gave Elaine a stealth hug before leaving the room. He walked out in the hall and

took deep breaths to steady himself.

Beatrice came out of the training hall as Jack was complaining to himself about how

he was too old for this. She grabbed his arm to get his attention. He turned to look at

her, eyebrow raised.

“Can we talk, Milord?,” she said. She gestured at some nearby benches for people

waiting to use the hall. “I want to know if you’re serious.”

“Almost never,” said Jack. He sat down on a bench. He made room so she could sit

down next to him.

“Were you serious about Thad Budd wanting to court me?,” said Beatrice.

“Did you ask him?,” asked Jack. He gestured at the training hall. “He was right

there.”

“You sprung this to see what would happen,” accused Beatrice.

“He’s afraid to talk to you,” said Jack. “He would rather admire you from afar rather

than take a chance on being turned down.”

“You think he’s afraid of the Missus?,” asked Beatrice.

“I’m almost afraid of the Missus,” said Jack. “Anybody who has seen Josie in action

is afraid of her. And Thad has seen her in action before she came up with the

exploding head trick that makes her even more dangerous now than what she was.

What do you want to do about this crush?”

“I don’t know,” said Beatrice. “I don’t think I am good with suitors.”

“Just because Todd had ulterior motives doesn’t mean Thad does, except for getting

in your skirts,” said Jack. “The real question is will you let him try.”

“I am not a maiden,” said Beatrice.

“Not my problem,” said Jack.

“Do men prefer women who are maidens?,” asked Beatrice.

“The easy answer is men prefer women who give them attention,” said Jack. “Some

men prefer women they have to attend. Why don’t you ask Thad what he wants?”

“What if he says no?,” said Beatrice.

“Do you want me to do it for you?,” asked Jack. “It’s not something I am an expert

in, but I am willing to say something to him.”

“Really?,” said Beatrice. “Like what?”

“I’ll think of something,” said Jack. “I love the dad talk more than I should. I think

about it as practice for when Elaine and I have little girls.”

“I think you like it too much,” said Beatrice. She shook her head. “Let me do this.

You’ll just mess it up.”

Jack made a go ahead gesture. Beatrice stood, and then he did too. He smiled as he

followed her back into the training hall. The other girls except for Alicia were

haranguing Thad. So was Case and Caroline. He stood in the door and watched

Beatrice draw Thad away from the crowd. They talked quietly in the corner of the

room.

Jack smiled as he watched. He hoped this thing went right for Bea.