Creation: Book 3 Complete!

Symphony was.....destroyed. The system timer ran out and it didn't even matter anymore. Parts of The Crater floated out and Muys were now floating into space, dying. The atmosphere was gone.

It took quite a bit of time for Walker to calm down, for the tears to stop, and for the dry heaves to begin and stop as well. When he did, the emotional exhaustion that settled onto his shoulders pushed him further into the ground, metaphorically and literally. He lay like that for some time, trying to think of ways he could've stopped this from happening. At one point, He decided that the alpha protocol was fucked up and had placed him in this position, then he blamed Virgil, before mentally spinning around and blaming himself. Walker still believed that it was largely the alpha protocol's fault. They placed restrictions on Virgil, who wasn't at fault in the end, and couldn't help him. They placed an average human being on this tiny planet and told him to create life. To modify life. To create.

"Virgil" Walker said in a raspy voice, the roughness in his throat mirroring the turmoil he had just experienced. "Can you tell what the Slicer is doing now?"

"Yes, but I am not sure you want to know." He was standing by the evolution chamber, seemingly in thought.

"Please."

Virgil turned and looked at Walker on the ground. "It has just destroyed another Creator's world."

Walker tried to move his tongue around his mouth, but it was too dry. He felt numb, like everything was happening to someone else, but one thing stuck to him. He'd created a greater monster than he had ever imagined.

"How?" he asked.

"Because while the protocol protects the creators, it does not and cannot protect their worlds. You are meant to expand and evolve, to make something greater than where you originally come from. Adversity is required."

"Fucckk!" He swore to the sky as he pounded a fist into the ground. Because of him and his monster, others were suffering. Each world snuffed out was a robbed possibility. A chance for something wonderful and magnificent to be created, not to mention a Creator failing in their tasks because of someone they'd never even met. He felt the weight settle on him again. He didn't want to look at the chatroom. Didn't want to see the messages that he was sure were popping up in confusion and terror. Of creatures from space coming for them, and fiery explosions destroying their dreams. He asked for advice from the one person who could give it.

"So what do I do Virgil. What do I do now? How do I fix this?"

"If you are speaking of the Slicer specifically, it cannot be fixed. The Cosmic Destroyer is gone, it is out there. All of the assistants in the protocol are now aware of it, a warning has been sent to all creators, and the system moves forward. The only positive I can tell you is that it is moving further and further away from here, and is not deviating from its path unless it finds a new world to destroy. It is done with you. The best thing you can do is focus on your tasks, fix Symphony with the World Editor, and move forward with the knowledge that you have now gained."

"A learning experience!" Walker yelled at Virgil with a flush staining his face. "You're giving me a teachable moment! I should just walk away from this and-and what? Go back to things! I made a fucking world destroyer, an abomination that consistently grows from being attacked! In my first try no less!" Walker could feel his heartbeat speed up and begin pounding against his chest. He was having trouble taking deeper breaths, like there wasn't enough oxygen in this tiny world to support him. His hands were tingling and it looked like everything was going so dark in his vision that he could barely make out Virgil. His thoughts were squeezing themselves in so fast that he didn't feel like he could focus on any one thing at a time. A new one would appear and his mind would try to track it, but as it gained a grasp, another would push for dominance. He felt paralyzed.

Virgil recognized what was happening and moved quickly to him. Placing a hand on his shoulder, he said, "Walker, you are having a panic attack. You need to calm down."

"I....I.....I can't."

"Yes you can, stop thinking about it."

"I....I....I" Walker tried talking, but he could only say the one letter.

"You have seen this in your students Walker. You know a way to take control back. Focus on your breathing, do not think, just breathe."

Walker tried to do as Virgil asked, tried to not think and just pay attention to his breathing, but instead of thoughts, memories began lashing his psyche. It was like a greatest hits reel of his failures, and he just a member of the audience. He saw old friends and the moments of their parting. He watched old girlfriends and the myriad of problems, the way things didn't work out. The anger, sadness, and crushed hopes of a true union of body and soul. A mountain of rejections when he tried to show people his truth, the sense of who he was deep inside that he had trouble expressing externally, only coming out in his writing and the odd emotional moment. The pinnacle of his memories glowed softly, with Valerie standing atop the mountain. But she wasn't the mountain upon which she stood. That was his oldest friend, Matt. He saw all the times that Matt had reached out, and he had rebuffed him for one reason or another. His love for his friend wasn't romantic, but brotherly, and he had never truly expressed his appreciation of him. Walker now realized, that if he completed the protocol, and chose to stay, he'd never get to meet Matt's child. To share in his experiences and grow old with him. He had been so caught up in the idea of creation and what he would get to do, that he'd forgotten all the things he would lose. His humanity, or more specifically his right to be human.

His memories and thoughts slowed down as Walker began to accept them as a part of himself, as a part of who he was, and who he was choosing to be. After all, he could just stop his work and go back to his world, Mr. Harrison or not. He saw his ex's for what they were, roadblocks toward the realization of who he could become. He saw his departed friendships and accepted that they had moved on, lived their lives, and didn't need him. His world needed him. HIS world. A world that he hadn't even really created yet. He could do better than where he came from. He could make something that truly mattered; that allowed those who wanted to grow into a better version of themselves, to have the ability to do so.

He looked at his memories of Valerie and saw the warning signs he hadn't recognized before. The deep nights where she worked extra long hours. Her wanting him to go out with her, somewhere, to do something fun, and him being too tired from work or lying and just needing to be alone for the night. He hadn't thought of her needs. Her wants. Everything was about Walker, just like with Matt. Matt, who just wanted to talk every so often. But it was hard to find time. Walker always felt a need to be around his friends, but then when they wanted to go out and be around other people, people he didn't know, he just wanted to go home and be away from the stress. From the unknown. Walker was constantly pulled in two directions. The need to be around people who cared about him, and the fear of being overwhelmed by strangers and situations he couldn't expect. It was why quitting his job had felt like such a relief. No more acting with his students, or being surrounded by moody teenagers who lashed out because no one had taught them how to express themselves. He'd tried, but he himself had trouble with it. Walker had always hoped that taking on a job where he had to speak to a group consistently would fix his anxiety issues. Burn it away through repeated exposure, as his father taught him. Face your fears Walker, he used to say.

Now he was on a tiny planet, with Virgil who had already seen all of his memories, his life, and if he chose.....he could always be home. A home he built. But to get there, mistakes would happen, and terrible things were always in the distance. He realized that now. The road to Creation will be mixed with potholes. His mistakes, which can lead to destruction, would have to be mitigated. Restrained and watched. But he knew, he could do it. He could succeed.

Walker's breathing slowly gained depth as he internally processed everything, enough so he could hesitatingly ask Virgil a question, "Virgil, y-you saw the memories of my parents, right?"

He waited a moment before saying, "Yes. I saw them in their totality."

Walker nodded from the ground before sitting up. His face felt hot and his lungs still felt like something was squeezing them, but he needed to talk this out, to express what was happening deep inside of him. It felt like the only way to recover. To find some semblance of internal balance.

"What do you think of my memories with my father?" He asked.

"Mmmh." He said in thought. "I think he was a hard man."

"Yeah haha, yeah." Walker said with a false laugh tinged with bitterness. "He was a hard man. He grew up in a different time than me. You know. Old school, y-you'd call it. He taught me that real men didn't show their emotions. Crying, depression, and basically, any kind of emotions....were for the weak. The infirm. If you were strong then you were stoic, a wall that emotions broke upon and found no way in. "Speak only when you have something to actually say." That's what he'd always say to me."

"Indeed."

"I know it's not normal. But......when you're raised a certain way, it-it becomes a part of you. That internal need to satisfy the standards of your parents, regardless of how messed up they are. And it worked too. I got through my deployment, and got into teaching kids with these horror stories from their lives. But....I don't know how--how to turn it off." He finished, his breathing growing shorter as he spoke. "It's....It's not easy to just....change. To decide one day that expressing feelings...putting it out there...is normal. That the wall can come down. So I-I-I." He paused for a moment to regulate his breathing before continuing, "I took everything in. Being here, creation, the Slicer.....and it just....it hit me, you know. I felt like a cup that was overfilling. When it blew up the planet...I just. I couldn't...."

"I understand Walker, and it is okay. It was a series of circumstances that were out of your control."

"But it wasn't though. I did that. I made it. Now others have to suffer because of me."

"Walker, we have already spoken of your why. You have already stated that you are going to make entities who are villainous."

"Yeah, but I planned on making them limited. Making it so that they couldn't destroy a fucking planet."

"Then you have to be prepared, mentally and emotionally, for things to go out of control again. If this happens again, in a key moment where you need to do something, then your time may be over." Virgil said with a sympathetic voice. "I understand. I have seen what you have seen, but you have to learn to grow from it, not be knocked down by it."

"I thought of that. You-you're right." He breathed out slowly. "It's just....I don't think I can change man."

"And I am not asking you to. I am just asking you to regulate it, and do your best to find a balance."

"Yeah, that's what I was using my journal for."

"Indeed. But, if you need to talk, I am here. And unlike those from your past.....I am not going anywhere."

Walker wiped the snot from under his nose with the back of his hand before rubbing it into the grass, "Thanks man."

"You are very welcome Walker. Now instead of spreading your genetic material into the grass, how about we work on Symphony."

Walker looked at the pieces of his world floating into space before saying, "I'm not sure if we can call it that in its current state."

"Then we will just have to fix it and make it that way. Your way." Virgil said, before patting Walker's back a few times. "We will figure it out."

The Slicer traveled through space, gaining more power as it destroyed each unique world and further evolved.

Upon entering one world, it found itself trapped inside a cage of impervious metal while it was destroying the creatures it found. Because of the distance, Walker couldn't see the evolutionary notifications anymore, but The Slicer could.

Evolution Occurring.

The Slicer is evolving!

.....Scanning.....

.....

The Slicer has gained logical reasoning.

What?, it thought to itself.