Chum

"The Goon Economy: Why People Choose to Work for Supervillains"

Leslie Lester, for Psychology Today, October 2022

When asked why anyone would choose to work for supervillains, most people imagine costumed henchmen cackling maniacally while fighting Spider-Man. The reality is far more mundane - and more economically fascinating.

"It's just a job," says Former Employee X under the condition of anonymity, who worked security for a major East Coast villain organization. "Better benefits than Netsphere, better pay than private security, and yeah, higher risk, but you've got clear procedures for hero encounters. Most guys never even see a cape."

The numbers support this pragmatic view. While exact figures are difficult to obtain, conservative estimates suggest supervillain organizations employ hundreds of thousands of workers across the U.S., from direct muscle to legitimate business employees. The total economic impact likely rivals major corporations.

But why choose such high-risk employment? Dr. Sarah Chen, economist at MIT, suggests three key factors:

Economic Pressure "In cities with active supervillain presence, these organizations often control major employment sectors - construction, shipping, waste management. Sometimes working for them isn't really a choice."

Risk vs. Reward The average "muscle" for a villain organization makes 1.5-2 times standard security work, with comprehensive health coverage and legal protection. "When you're living paycheck to paycheck," Chen notes, "guaranteed medical care becomes very attractive."

Systemic Integration Many workers start through legitimate businesses, becoming gradually involved in illegal activities. "It's rarely a conscious choice to 'become a minion,'" Chen explains. "It's more like finding out your company has mob ties - but you've got a mortgage and kids in school."

The psychology is equally complex. Dr. James Morrison of Harvard explains: "These organizations offer what many legitimate employers don't: clear advancement paths, protection from both heroes and rivals, and often a sense of belonging. They're filling gaps in our social safety net."

The rise of powers-based crime has only increased this trend. "Supervillain organizations have better protocols for superhuman encounters than most legitimate businesses," Morrison notes. "If you're working in a city where hero-villain battles are common, that matters."

Consider the "Infinite Copse", a major West Coast criminal organization that arose in the power vacuum left after the Big Raid. They operate legitimate tech companies, control unions, and invest in community centers. An employee might start in their cybersecurity division, never knowing they're working for "supervillains" until they're already enmeshed in the system.

"The question isn't 'Why would someone work for villains?'" Chen concludes. "It's 'Why wouldn't they?' In many urban areas, they're offering better jobs, better security, and better futures than legitimate alternatives. Until that changes, the goon economy will continue to grow."

The numbers are staggering. A typical "street-level employee" in a major villain organization earns $45,000-65,000 annually, compared to the $35,000-45,000 for comparable private security work. Health insurance coverage averages $12,000 per employee annually - nearly double standard corporate plans, reflecting the hazard rates, and specialized doctors willing to work off the books provide thousands of dollars of additional value that goes unseen.

"Legal retainers alone cost these organizations billions," notes Chen. "The Infinite Copse maintains a $50 million annual fund just for employee legal defense. That's actually good business - it ensures employee loyalty and reduces turnover."

The economic footprint extends far beyond direct employment. In cities with major villain presence, these organizations often control:

30-40% of port labor

25-35% of construction contracts

40-50% of waste management

15-20% of local small businesses (through protection rackets)

Traditional organized crime generates an estimated $150 billion annually in North America. Powers-based organizations like the Copse have integrated this existing infrastructure while expanding into new territories. Conservative estimates suggest they've increased traditional criminal revenue streams by 60-80%.

"In Los Angeles alone, you're looking at probably 60,000 people who depend directly on Copse-controlled businesses for employment," Chen explains. "Add indirect employment and family dependents, and you're approaching 300,000 people economically tied to a single villain organization. That's why law enforcement can't just 'shut them down' - they're too integrated into the local economy."

Risk factors are surprisingly moderate. Annual fatality rates for "muscle" positions average 0.8% - higher than construction (0.1%) but lower than what most assume. "Most villain organizations are pragmatic," Morrison notes. "Dead employees are bad for business. They have protocols to minimize hero-minion confrontations."

The implications are sobering. With an estimated 200,000 to 300,000 Americans directly employed by supervillain organizations, and perhaps five times that number economically dependent on their operations, we're looking at an economic force comparable to major industrial sectors. In cities like Philadelphia or Baltimore, villain organizations often represent the third or fourth largest "employer" when counting both direct and indirect employment.

"We need to stop thinking about this as a law enforcement problem," Chen concludes. "When a villain organization can offer $75,000 starting salary with full benefits to people who'd otherwise make $35,000 with no healthcare, that's not just a crime issue - it's a systemic economic reality. The question isn't why people work for villains. The question is why legitimate businesses aren't competing for these workers."

Until that fundamental economic imbalance is addressed, the goon economy will continue to thrive. As Former Employee X puts it: "Nobody dreams of being a henchman. But nobody dreams of being unable to pay their kid's medical bills either. And when you're working, you know, 'security', and your boss says "hey, we just need you to watch these civilians for an hour, let them know if they move bad things will happen, and we'll handle any legal problems"... you don't want to lose that income telling him no, you know? It's real easy to just... slip into it. You barely even notice, and it puts food on the table."

In a world where powers fall randomly from the sky, perhaps it's time to examine the very human economics that drive ordinary people into extraordinary crime. The real superpower, it seems, might just be a living wage.