Ballistic Coefficient

Kayla and Pale ran until they could no longer hear their pursuers behind them. By the time it was clear, the storm and rain had dissipated, and night had fallen. The only signs that anyone had been there were the footprints they left behind on the hills in the wet grass and mud.

"Stop," Pale commanded. "I think that's enough for today. We've been through a lot; we need to rest."

"Yeah…" Kayla breathed between gasps of air. "Yeah, let's… let's stop for the night…"

She collapsed onto the ground, her limbs splayed out as she stared up at the sky. Pale, meanwhile, shrugged off her backpack, then placed it on the ground and sat on it as she laid her shotgun across her lap.

"I'll take the first watch," Pale offered. "We'll both try for four hours of sleep tonight. I'll wake you when it's your turn to take watch."

"Four hours…?"

"I know, it's not a lot. But I want to put some more distance between them and us before I'm comfortable sleeping for any longer than that. Plus, we can't afford to spend too much time resting if we want to track down your father."

Kayla reluctantly nodded. "Yeah, you're right."

Pale adjusted herself to sit a bit more comfortably. "Get some rest, Kayla. You need it."

Kayla said nothing, instead turning over onto her side and closing her eyes. Pale took her eyes off her, instead looking back the way they'd come, looking for anything that moved in the darkness. A heavy silence settled over the two of them, though it didn't last for long.

"Hey, Pale?"

Pale turned to face Kayla. "Don't talk, Kayla – you need to rest."

"I know, but… there's something bothering me. I was hoping you could help."

Pale frowned, but nodded nonetheless. "Very well. What is it?"

Kayla sat up to face her. She hesitated, biting her lip, before finally taking a breath.

"The people I've killed… I know they were bad people and all, but… I can't get over it, you know? I… I didn't have much time to dwell on it until we were running away, but now that it's pretty quiet… I don't know."

"You're worried about the fact that you took a life," Pale finished. Kayla nodded, and Pale sighed. "...Admittedly, I am the wrong one to ask about this. I was designed not to feel remorse over the people I've killed."

"So, what, you just… feel nothing?"

"Nothing at all," Pale told her. "It's war. I cannot afford to be sympathetic to the enemy if we are to be victorious over them."

"But… to not even think about it all, that's…"

"Cold?" Pale asked. "Heartless?" She shook her head. "Those words are meaningless to me."

"But not to me."

Pale fell silent at that. Slowly, she nodded. "Yes. You have morality; I was designed without it."

Kayla bit her lip, then shook her head. "The thing is… I don't think that's true, Pale."

"Really?" Pale questioned. She leaned in. "And why would you say that?"

"Well… you said you were created from mapping the human brain, right? That you can think for yourself, and do all of these amazing things. And yet… you also claim that you were designed without remorse, to say nothing of any other emotions. But here's the thing… if you were created from a human brain, then shouldn't you be able to feel those things? That's part of what makes us people, after all. So why is it that you apparently can't feel them, despite being created from a human?"

Pale blinked. That… was a very good question. She searched her data banks for an answer, but to her amazement, she found nothing.

"I… do not know," she admitted, her eyes widening in shock. "This is… odd. I have never been at a loss like this before…"

"P-please don't worry about it!" Kayla insisted. "I didn't mean to put you on the spot like that or anything! I just… I don't know, that doesn't add up to me. We can discuss it later."

"Indeed. For now, you are the one struggling." Pale took a deep breath. "...Again, I am not the one you should be asking about this, but… perhaps I can offer some respite?"

Kayla's eyes widened. "Y-yes, that would be good. If you can do it, I mean."

Pale looked up to the stars. They still looked so unfamiliar to her.

"...My creators have spent many years ruminating on topics such as this. How to assuage the guilt of having killed someone, I mean. It's a bit of an odd topic – some people can kill many and feel nothing, and others never get over their first, no matter how justified it may have been. In your case, however… what you did doesn't make you a bad person, Kayla."

Kayla seemed taken aback by that. Her ears flattened against her head, and she averted her gaze down to the ground.

"...I certainly feel like one," she admitted.

"Why is that?"

"Because killing is wrong, that's why."

"But there are some circumstances in which it is unavoidable. You'd admit to that, correct?"

"Of course. But even despite that, I can't help but feel awful about what I did to those men, you know?"

Pale shook her head. "You did what you had to do, Kayla. Those men would have killed that girl, and then tried to kill us. There was no other option but to kill them. Don't let it get to you; like I said, it doesn't make you a bad person."

Kayla exhaled softly. "Rationally, I know you're right, but-"

"But this isn't a rational feeling," Pale finished. "I… I'm sorry. I am used to cold rationality winning out more than anything; such is my nature as a machine. But people don't work like that, do they?" She shook her head. "I will tell you this much, Kayla – I can tell you are still a kind person. I know you would never hurt anyone unless you were forced to. But the fact is, there do exist people out there who need to be stopped, whether that's by hurting them or killing them. I understand it must feel awful for you, to go against a sacred rule that you hold to so dearly, but sometimes, there is no choice but to break a rule in order to save more lives. Those men from earlier, for example – how many more people do you think they would have killed if we'd let them go?"

Kayla flinched at that. "I understand… I just… I don't like serving as judge, jury, and executioner. Who am I to decide who lives and who dies in the moment?"

"The same could be said of them," Pale pointed out. "Who gave them permission to murder and pillage their way through your hometown? Nobody, that's who. Yet they did it anyway. Some people can't be reasoned with, or talked down from what they're doing. And if what they're doing is going to cause more deaths, then there's only one way to deal with them."

Pale took a breath. "I know it's hard for you, but… those won't be the last, most likely." Kayla flinched at that, but after a moment, she nodded.

"You're right," she said softly. "I… this is for my father, and the people who have already died and who they would kill if they were allowed to run rampant like they are now. I may not like it, but… if it comes down to it… ultimately, there's no choice."

"That's correct," Pale confirmed. "I'm sorry. For what it's worth, I wish it was simpler than that, but it isn't. At least, not the way people like you deal with it."

"No… no, that's quite alright. I actually feel a little bit better now, thanks to you."

"Good." Pale looked back up at the sky, frowning as she did so. "Get some rest, please. You need it."

Kayla nodded, then rolled back over onto her side and closed her eyes. She was asleep soon after, her chest gently rising and falling with every breath.

From the way she flinched and whimpered in her sleep, Pale knew she was plagued with nightmares.

And for some reason she couldn't place, that made her uncomfortable.

–

"Pale, it's time to get up."

Pale let out a tired yawn as her eyes cracked open. Sure enough, it was just after dawn, approximately four hours from when she had woken up. She rose to her feet and threw on her backpack, then slung her shotgun over her front.

"Any threats in the night?" she asked.

Kayla shook her head. "No, nothing. At least, nothing I noticed."

"Good. Let's get going, then."

They started to walk once more. The skies were overcast yet again, but aside from a few far-off rumbles of thunder, there was no rain, which was a small mercy for both of them given how their past few days had gone.

"By the way," Pale said as they walked. "Do you know where we are right now?"

"Yes, I do," Kayla confirmed. "At this point, we should be a few miles away from the next town – place called Woodbriar. It's a little bit bigger than my hometown is… was."

She trailed off at that, falling quiet. Pale frowned.

"Hey," she said, getting Kayla's attention. "Don't do this to yourself."

"But-"

"I know, it hurts. But dwelling on it won't help you, as callous as that may be to say. Remember our talk last night?" Kayla nodded. "It applies to this, too. People died, and you lost loved ones; they may have been the first, but they won't be the last. You're very young, Kayla – death is a natural part of life, even premature death. It's sad for you, I'm sure, but if you're going to do anything to remember them, let it show in your actions rather than your thoughts. Understand?"

Kayla slowly nodded. Pale took a breath.

"Good," she said.

And that was the end of it. They continued on in silence for the rest of the day, saying nothing to each other the entire time. Eventually, however, the silence was interrupted by Kayla abruptly pointing at something on the horizon.

"Up ahead is the town," she said. "I think we're about fifteen minutes out."

Pale squinted, trying to get a better look. Sure enough, the endless fields and plains began to give way to a sparse forest, and through the foliage, she was just able to make out the silhouettes of buildings ahead.

"Just in time, too," Pale noted, looking at the sun's position in the sky; it was just about to crest below the horizon.

She motioned for Kayla to take the lead, and together, they both headed for the town of Woodbriar.