A Murder Wizards Adventure

The enraged Bijuu doesn't waste any time picking his next target, that being Tsunade who immediately starts running around, dodging as Isobu sends blasts of chakra, coral and what I think is just pure shockwaves down towards her.

Meanwhile, I consider my options.

The beast is covered in a sharp, spikey carapace that I don't think I could break, Tsunade might be able to crack it, but that's only going to piss it off even more.

No, what we need to do is kill it.

So first, what do we know about Bijuu.

They are beings of pure energy, made out of chakra and nothing else. I consider turning it to stone with natural energy before remembering I'd need to have more than one third of it's chakra reserves worth of natural energy to do so.

Now, my reserves are rather deep at this point, in fact, I could be called a monster at this point, but in terms of pure quantity, no one can match a Bijuu. I doubt even Madara has that much chakra, he can simply wield it to much greater effect.

It feels like there's something there. Some burgeoning idea, on the cusp of being realised.

But the thought slips through my grasp and I can do nothing but watch as Tsunade barely dodges another Bijuudama and punches a beam of coral into a fine mist.

Fuck me, I need a solution and I need it fast, because the longer I take the less chakra Tsunade and I have to spare to kill the fucker.

I don't think I've ever faced a challenge this insurmountable before, even the previous fight pales in comparison, since even with the immense pain, I could still come up with a solution. No matter how stupid a solution it was.

Even though the acid is all gone by now and I am fully healed, I am still feeling phantom pains everywhere on my body.

𝘍𝘶𝘤𝘬 𝘪𝘵 𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘩𝘶𝘳𝘵𝘴 𝘴𝘰 𝘮𝘶𝘤𝘩.

But in the face of all of this, I can't keep the deranged smile from splitting my face.

This, this is what I live for.

This emotion, this 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨.

It's so intense, like a fire in my heart, burning me whole.

I've never felt such.. 𝘥𝘦𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯 before and I love it.

Such a new and unique feeling should be celebrated, even more so because when I do find a solution, when I do overcome this impossible hurdle and achieve victory, the satisfaction I must feel then will surely be simply 𝙙𝙞𝙫𝙞𝙣𝙚.

But if I want to feel that feeling, then I must focus.

This battle isn't going to win itself and I need a solution and I need it fast.

Nothing I have can really kill it, the only one who has that kind of firepower here would be Tsunade, well, obviously there is also-

Oh.

Heh.

My deranged smile takes on a cruel glint as a plan formulates in my mind.

That's the thing isn't it, people view the Bijuu as monsters, spirits, animals, but I know better than that.

They are just as human as the rest of us, they feel just as much as the rest of us.

Happiness, anger, confusion, sadness, loss and most importantly, pure unadulterated 𝙬𝙧𝙖𝙩𝙝.

Human emotions, human weaknesses.

His only physical weaknesses are his eyeballs, but emotional?

Well, it's not like the Bijuu have ever been to a therapist, I'm willing to bet they are like me and don't have much experience dealing with intense emotions.

Though, unlike me, I doubt they have the rational mind necessary to ignore it.

Then there's the fact that the beastie is currently raging, clearly he is upset about something, considering the timing, it's rather obvious what.

The iddy biddy Bijuu got attached to the widdle humans.

How cute~.

How pathetic.

Still, it serves me well enough that I can't exactly complain.

So with a thought I create a pair of Shadow Clones, both as invisible as me, so I can't see them, but that doesn't matter, they are me, they know what to do without me telling them.

So I get closer to the Beast and get ready for the one, two combo that will hopefully put it down, if only for a time.

If it doesn't? Well, it's called a gamble for a reason, it wouldn't be fun if there wasn't any stakes.

I keep my eyes on Tsunade as I get closer to the Beast, and once I see her making the signal, which is to say winking twice, simple and effective, I know the plan is in motion.

I look to the side and watch myself appear, only I am not alone, kneeling before me is Minamo and Kasumi, both of them looking horrible, like they've been being tortured for days.

Then I see myself call out for Beastie, who stills as he sees the scene before him.

Slowly the Beast turns to be facing my clone and presumably, my clones clones, or it could just be real people he quickly grabbed and Genjutsu, that seems like something I'd do, clones pop after all.

Before Isobu can do anything more than stare, my clone viciously rips the heads off of both of the bodies, proving that they aren't clones.

My clone smiles a smile of pure malice and cruelty at Isobu as the Beast looks on in shock.

Shock that slowly turns to anger.

Anger that rapidly deepens to rage.

Rage that transforms into a 𝙝𝙖𝙩𝙧𝙚𝙙, so deep and intense that I can't help but stare, transfixed by the beauty of what I am witnessing.

A hatred so intense that I am feeling vestiges of it suffusing with me.

𝘈𝘩𝘩𝘯~

Damnit. Stop getting distracted.

I shake my head and focus back on the plan, which seems to be going smoothly, as the Beast opens its gaping maw and starts charging a Bijuudama bigger than anything he has done so far.

I celebrate in my mind momentarily as the plan seems to be going well so far.

Now for the dicey part.

Being a Sage has enhanced my strength tremendously, of that there is no doubt, but I still can't match what Tsunade is capable of throwing around, oh, there's an idea, learning that technique could be a good reason to make sure our potential relationship works out well.

Anyway, back to the subject at hand, I can hit really hard, but I doubt my ability to hit hard enough to stumble a Bijuu, especially one focused on defence, which is why it's a good thing I've been messing around with Fuinjutsu in hopes of completing my magnum opus.

So, when I jump in the air, soaring above and beyond the head of the Beast, I pull out a hammer as long as I am tall, with a head that is a rectangle 25cm(10inch) wide and thick and 75cm(30Inch) long.

The hammer is also inscribed with a gravity seal, that makes gravities effect on the hammer increase tenfold, and beyond even that, it is covered with explosive tags, unfortunately making it a one use item, as I am not good enough to make something that is basically a replica of one of the Seven Swords.

Right as the Bijuudama starts reaching truly an incredible level of strength and seems to be ready for release, no matter how overkill it would be, only then do I reach the Beast's forehead and I spin for momentum as I put all of my strength into slamming my hammer into it's head with everything I can muster.

The resulting impact and explosion not only breaks my hammer, it also breaks both of my arms and sears the flesh from bone across the entire front of my torso, all the while sending me flying away like a ragdoll.

Between the pain and the vertigo, I manage a wry thought.

It's a good thing I still have my medical cloak on otherwise I'd surely be dead.. again.

But I'm not the only one injured, as once I finally right myself mid air and look towards the Beast, I see another explosion, this one even larger than anything I am capable of.

My strike forced the beast's maw to close over his own Bijuudama, and with the sound of a thousand thundercracks Isobu 𝘳𝘦𝘤𝘰𝘪𝘭𝘴 violently as beams and flashes of dark purple, almost black light escapes from various holes in Isobu's face.

There isn't a shockwave, Isobu having shouldered almost the entirety of the explosion himself, his face now full of holes and cracks as the Beast wobbles around, disoriented and hurt.

That's the one, now time for the two.

Not a moment after I had that thought, does Tsunade appear in front of the Beast's injured eye and swing forward a punch containing all of her might.

This time, there is a shockwave, larger than anything I've felt, the only reason I'm not sent flying gain is that I am already so far away. The result of her punch is that Tsunade is sent flying backwards from the recoil.

Meanwhile, the Beast's face, goes from badly damaged to practically non existent.

Remembering that Tsunade doesn't have much chakra right now, I rush to intercept her flight path and catch her in my arms, keeping her held high because I'm still naked and I don't think she would appreciate that right now.

Neither of us say anything, instead opting to watch the Beast as it slowly falls into the ocean, dissolving into a mist of chakra as it does so.

We're fairly sure that the amount of time it takes for a Bijuu to respawn is about equal to it's number of tails in years, though if someone managed to destroy them completely and utterly, it would probably be a lot longer.

The important part however, is that it's over.

We won.

The joyous smile on my face is so bright and pure as the immense satisfaction of overcoming this challenge flows through my veins and I can't help but want to share this feeling with someone.

So, I henge some clothes on and undo my invisibility and face Tsunade, who is still in my arms.

Quietly at first, I whisper to her.

"We did it. We won."

Then, as she returns my smile of joy with one of relief, I turn to the crowd that has been watching the whole time, and I face the sky as I call out our victory.

"WE WON!!!"

I laugh.

Slowly, hesitantly, Tsunade joins me, and we spend a moment just standing there, laughing as Konoha-nin start cheering and celebrating, while Kiri-nin have already started retreating the moment Isobu made an appearance.

Eventually, Tsunade regained enough chakra that she won't have any problem walking around on the slowly receding tide herself so I stopped carrying her.

"Why do you look so happy?" Tsunade says to me after a moment of silence.

Turning to her, still smiling happily, I consider how to answer. I do want to try out a romance subplot, to see if it's as interesting as books always seem to make it out to be, so I decide to respond with some honesty.

"There is no greater euphoria than overcoming a hurdle thought to be impossible." I say with enthusiasm and passion that I can feel slowly fade from my system as I return to my default.

So I just stand there, feeling nothing but amusement, the rush of emotions having waned into nothing already.

I try to grasp the feelings in my mind, to hold onto them, but like the wind they slip through my grasp, returning me to nothing. I feel a brief pang of melancholy at the loss of emotion, but the moment passes and I am back to normal.

As if nothing ever happened, I focus on Tsunade as she gained a strange, slightly angry look on her face from my response, and thought out her own before responding.

"So, is that what I am to you? Is that actually why you wanted to try and have something with me? Am I just another challenge for you to overcome?" She accuses with a heated voice.

Calmly I smile to her and try to be as soothing as possible even as I remain mostly honest.

"No, you are not a challenge to be overcome, you are an experience that I want to enjoy. Both of us know what it's like to be in a relationship, but neither of us know what it's like to go any further than that. That is what I am looking for here."

Tsunade becomes contemplative at my words, not that she can hide the slight flinch at the reminder of Dan, but it has been years, and she still has something of a clan and Nawaki as a support system.

Which means she's dealt with it like a normal healthy person, instead of going full, haemophilic, gambling, alcoholic.

She nods her head and doesn't say anything more as the commanders start approaching us, all of them looking at Tsunade with even more respect than before, while the looks they are giving me range between surprise, respect, fear and oddly enough, horror.

Is that because of the whole, melting thing?

This isn't going to end up being a big deal is it?

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A/N: He~llo! Dear readers!

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