A Murder Wizards Adventure

It's been around five years since I've been to Kiri and a lot has changed since then, for one, I now look more or less like an adult, like a young adult. I've gone through a growth spurt and am now standing at a tall 180cm (5'11), which puts me at a head taller than most people I know, I'm also solidly an elite Jonin, one of the best, which is just doing amazing things to my ego, though the Sanin could probably each beat me one on one without too much difficulty and I'm nowhere near any Kage just yet.

I have also gained a summon. I used the reverse summoning Jutsu a few years ago, it takes you to whatever summoning land is most suited to you, it took me to the Chameleons, and I'm sure you know what that means. Invisibility baby! They taught me how to become completely invisible, at least visually, I have to use my own separate Jutsu to hide my scent and my skill and training are enough to be soundless.

I subtly asked the Chameleons about becoming a Sage, but apparently, I have to 'prove myself' or something, basically it's something that will take time.

The only other projects I've completed is my medical chakra one, which isn't as good as I had been expecting, but it certainly helps in a fight and my Fuinjutsu tattoos, though only for storage because the other stuff is just way too complicated that even Mito coudn't make it make sense to me, my tattoos are just two simple black bands around each of my wrists, and I have started hording.

As for missions, well, nothing too interesting, mostly just assassinating civilians and merchants, not something my squad and I would have struggled with, though there were a few fights and I do have a few new scars, but nothing significant.

As for now, it was my birthday yesterday, which I spent with my family in the morning and with my friends at night, we managed to not get in trouble this time though because Fox decided to chaperone and not drink, how responsible of him.

Now, I've been told to report to ANBU for something unspecified, so I'm heading for Lions office.

Knocking and opening his door I see that he's not alone, sitting with him is a female ANBU with a bird-like mask that looks rather elegant.

"you wanted to see me lion?"

"yes, but first, introductions, this here is swan, swan, this is butterfly."

Swan and I acknowledge each other with nods before Lion continues.

"as you are an infiltration specialist and seeing as you've finally come of age, you are now going to spend some time taking lessons from swan here, as she is our resident seduction expert, and you have been noted to be both attractive and charismatic I don't doubt you two will get along like a house on fire."

Oh yeah, the age of consent here is fifteen, at least for civilians, an older ninja could have groomed me as soon as I got my headband and it technically wouldn't have been illegal. fun. Also, seduction? I'm liking where this is going.

Swan stands and walks up to me with a sway to her hips that draws my eyes instinctively and starts talking in a low purr, clearly her mask doesn't have the monotone effect. No fair, I want.

"It's a 𝘱𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘶𝘳𝘦 to meet you Butterfly, I've heard such good things, and I'm looking forward to 𝘦𝘥𝘶𝘤𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 you."

Damn. I can feel myself blushing a little at her words combined with her closeness, she is good, still, I like to give as good as I get, so I take a small step forward so that our chests are touching and she has to look up to keep eye contact, er, mask? contact? Whatever, I lift my mask slightly to show my mouth so that my tone isn't lost and she can see my grin.

"I look forward to it 𝘴𝘦𝘯𝘴𝘦𝘪 please give me a most 𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩 education."

Swan doesn't speak for a moment before bursting out in laughter, holding her sides as she doubles down and I see Lion drop his face on his desk with a mutter of 'great, another one'.

Swan calms down after a bit and practically squeals.

"Oh you are just a treat aren't you."

"I try my best, shall we?"

Swan accepts my gesture to the door and leads the way away as we take some more unfamiliar corridors before she opens a door and leads me inside, however instead of a meeting or open room as I expected, it's a bedroom.

"This is my room if you're wondering."

"My, so forward, but we only just met, and you're my sensei, it wouldn't be right."

I make sure to sound like I really want it but don't want ot upset social norms like I'm holding myself back, but it just makes Swan laugh again, more softly this time, before she surprises me by taking off her mask, revealing a frankly beautiful blonde, with almond shaped eyes and a perfectly symmetrical face and full, plump lips, she really is textbook beautiful.

"You really are going to fit in just fine. Now, first things first, I'm going to need to see what I'm working with."

Saying so with a wink Swan gestures to my mask, so I shrug and take it off, revealing my own slightly androgynous but still clearly male face with a kind smile and bright pink short hair, looking like a picture perfect prince charming, I make sure to return her wink too.

"Should I take off more? Or are you satisfied with this?"

With a delicate chuckle, Swan prepares some tea while gesturing to a low table by her bed, where I take a seat.

"No, no, this is fine for now, though I must say, it's good that you're already so confident in yourself, generally when someone starts out with their seduction training they are a lot more anxious and 'flighty' shall we say."

"Well, what can I say? Narcissism breeds confidence?"

That gets an undignified snort out of Swan before she takes a seat opposite me and pours out the now done tea.

"That's one way of putting it, now I just need to know, is there anything you are uncomfortable with or not ready for? Just because you're learning seduction, doesn't mean you have to jump straight into the deep end. There's no pressure."

That's surprisingly gentle, and she clearly means it too, unless she's actually lying and I just can't notice, I'll give her the benefit of the doubt.

"Well, I'd rather not lose my virginity to you and I'm definitely straight, but other than that, I'm good with whatever."

Swan puts down her cup to hold her heart theatrically as if wounded.

"Ah, my heart, am I not good enough for you?"

"Quite the opposite really, I may not be a sore loser but I'm also not in the habit of picking fights I don't stand a chance at winning, a challenge is fun but an eventuality is boring, y'know?"

This makes her contemplative, because sex isn't just sex, at least, not if it's for a job, like this. Instead, it's a battle, only a much more subtle one, and it's clear that I am vastly outmatched in terms of experience, so I don't doubt she would play me like a fiddle, I'd rather get started on something more achievable. Swan also seems to realise what I was implying, which is nice.

"I see, are you sure you're new to this? You seem to have a natural talent for it if that's the case."

I just shrug irreverently and we move on.

"Today I won't be doing much teaching, instead we will just get to know each other, get comfortable with each other, is that ok?"

"Sure, what do you want to know? My three sizes?"

"Hilarious, but I was thinking more simple things, such as your name for instance."

Oh, yeah, we haven't even properly introduced ourselves to each other, have we?

"Well, my name is Hanabira Haruno, I like having fun and overcoming challenges, I dislike strenuous physical activity, especially when it isn't even for a fun reason, like training stamina for instance."

Swan's lip twitches slightly at my dislikes, but continues anyway, with an attractive smile that I'm beginning to think is just her default.

"I am Kumiko Kimura, I like teaching diligent juniours and having fun with friends at the bar, I dislike pain and orange juice."

"Orange juice?"

"We all have our quirks."

We then spend a few hours just making idle conversation with each other, and at one point she got up and straddled me, still continuing normal conversation despite the closeness, so I figured I should as well and just grabbed her hips and kept talking about why red is just a worse version of the colour pink.

Eventually, the day is clearly coming to an end, when Kumiko changes the conversation, still straddled to my lap, face inches away from my own.

"Before you go, I have one lesson and some homework for you."

At my raised eyebrow she continues.

"The homework is to get yourself a girlfriend, we will be meeting once a week, I expect you to have a girlfriend by then, and I will grade you based on how far along the two of you have gotten, though I don't think I need to say it, I will anyway, using pressure is cheating, the rules are that she must be around your age and that any advancements in the relationship need to be instigated by her, the challenge is to get her to move forward, see?"

Interesting, definitely the best homework I've ever received, and I'm kinda glad about the rules, rape isn't fun after all, I don't even find sex particularly pleasurable, at least I didn't in the Before, because to me, most of the pleasure of sex is my partners, like a vampire I want to feel her pleasure more than my own, so I ain't gonna force no one, though she did say something about a lesson too, didn't she?

"Sounds fun, and the lesso-"

Before I can finish my sentence her face is suddenly much closer and her lips are on mine in a delicate embrace before I feel her tongue prodding my lips for entrance, which I allow, turning a delicate kiss into a passionate french kiss as our tongues fight for dominance, a fight that I am badly losing. A few moments later and she backs up, leaving me out of breath and with a blush while she just has a smug smirk on her face that makes me smile wryly.

"For the record, this is exactly what I meant."

"Well, you've got to learn somehow."

With that, she leans in close again and we spend the next half hour or so making out, with Kumiko giving advice or criticisms every now and then to make me a better kisser, critisism I welcome gladly, as who doesn't want to be better at a la sex?

But like all things, eventually, the day is over and I head back home with a lot on my mind, namely, how do I find a girlfriend? I don't want to just pick some guileless civilian, that'd feel too easy, I guess tomorrow I will just walk around town, and see if anyone catches my eye.

With those parting thoughts, I go to sleep, excited about the coming days in more ways than one.

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A/N: He~llo! Dear readers!

So! Sexy times! I'm not planning to be writing any smut cuz fuck you thats why you horny bastards. Plus I'm asexual, kinda, more like drugs and mental issues killed my sex drive completely so I don't even think about it never mind write about it.

Anyway, love you all <3

Also for anyone who still really wants smut, I am easily bribed ;)
https://ko-fi.com/bored_works