A Chronometric Defect

I want to be angry. I really do. I just, can't. It's not because of Wrath. No, it's not because of Temperance. Screw you, Temperance. Yes, I know you hear me. Nyaaaa.

It's because...

I think I'm in love.

That dragon. THAT DRAGON.

I should've known the moment he grew a giant maw on his chest. He ate an entire country in one bite, but that was with his power. No, his own body was starting to represent who he really was inside.

It must be true. It MUST be.

He... He ATE ME!

Oh, I just want to... Wait, that's not right.

Lust, are you coercing my thoughts? You are? Well it's fine, if you'll help me. I... I NEED HIM! I... What kind of deal can we... No, fuck you. No, I don't mean that literally, I mean screw off. No, not that ei—

Just go the hell away!

Ahem.

HE ACTUALLY ATE ME! Nobody has ever eaten me. Nobody. Not a single one in all these eons. I thought the only thing I could love was food.

But now I realize: I LOVE BEING FOOD TOO!!!

Oh, no. This is too... Augh, I... There's something wrong with my mind. I— I want to feed him and make him eat me again. But I can't do that, I know where that leads.

I'm not stupid.

I'm hungry, for him, and I want him to hunger for me. Just feeding him won't... Wait.

What if I— no, that won't work. Alright, but it's not a bad idea overall. Then, how about—

"Gluttony, my god. Here is the pile of black dragons you asked for."

I examine the pile of dead dragons with glee.

"Ah, wonderful! Now I can at least pretend he's here with me. Shame they won't eat me back. UNNNNNN please dragon I need yoooou."

I writhe my tentacles in frustration.

"Uhm, my god. Are you okay?"

"GO AWAY! I'm plotting."

I slap the sin servant with one of my tentacles.

*splop*

"Yes, my god."

Hm, he looks delicious.

"And clean yourself off before I get even more hungry from looking at you."

"Yes, my god."

I engulf a random black dragon.

*schlarf*

*schrup*

*krnch*

But it merely tastes good. Everything tastes good. Why can't you taste me back?! Ughhhh.

I shove all of them into my maws.

*clngh*

*KRaaK*

*ghlup*

Anyway, where was I? Ah, right.

I have control of the most lower universe planets. Far and away more than all the other sins and virtues. This is the best tool at my disposal; how do I get him to eat them? To make him want to eat mooooore. I don't know if I can weaken his Will enough to bring him under my control.

That's one HELL of a skill he's got. Heh.

Hmm.

So, first, I've gotta invade his planet to make him get off his comfy ass. Indolence will be pissed, as he always is any time I stir literally any pot. But he's too lazy to take a shit, never mind contest me. How that moron continues to exist is a mystery.

Okay, so step two. Hmm. Say the dragon's in space. There's lots of edible rocks in space. Some of those are tastier than others, true, but a proper glutton will eat when food exists. Food always exists, but the glutton part...

Ah, what if I make him need power quickly. Such as, after he 'fends off' the invasion, they retreat but threaten him. 'You have mere days before we invade again!' Stereotypical villain line? Hm, I like it. I'll tell them to say that specifically. Then he's gotta eat nearby asteroids and maybe planets to get strong enough before they return.

I mean, it'll throw his solar system out of whack, but I'm sure he can deal with that. My goal isn't to destroy his little Eden at this point. I'll let him do whatever else he wants so long as he eats.

But what if that's not enough to push him over...

Oh, I know! Once he's hyped up on space rocks, I'll have them move some distant stars toward his planet. If they keep throwing stars at him he'll be forced to eat 'em, right? Eventually, the stat bloat he'll get from eating stars should outweigh his Will, and that's when his glutton tendency should completely take over. He'll become a new glutton god! Except, I'm creating one the hard way rather than by infecting his Will.

I mean, it shouldn't be too difficult. He's already got such a huge maw on his body, meaning the majority of his stats must've come from consumption rather than Mana or treasures. Perhaps he eats the treasures, haha! If he's doing that I might not even need this plan. Well, better safe than sorry.

I'll DO IT anyway!

I guess technically he won't be under my authority, but— it's fine. They always come to me eventually. Once he's infected by gluttony, there won't be any going back. And then... WE CAN EAT EACH OTHER FOREVER! YES! Yes.

If only these other glutton gods could eat like he does. They wouldn't be consumed by me before taking a smidgen of my delicious flesh.

All these eons I never knew what it was like being food because they were so damn weak. Ugh! Such a pity. I feel my godhood has been wasted, now that I've found...

Him.