The Simulacrum

In the end, I was right. I know that doesn't really narrow things down, as I am right about a lot of things, but this time in particular I was extra right about how our breakfast would turn out to be our lunch in the end. Furthermore, what started out to be just another stunt by my girlfriends sneakily escalated into The Calamity Lunch Version 2.0: Electric Boogaloo.

Well, fine, I might be slightly overly dramatic here. It wasn't as disastrous as the last time, but it was still a pain in the neck. As they say, too many cooks spoil the broth, and that idiom has rarely been as fitting as in this case. For some unexplainable reason Angie, Snowy, and even Josh followed after my girlfriends, ostensibly to help with their impromptu competition, yet their meddling somehow resulted in full course meal that got finished way outside of the time frame of 'breakfast', and consisted of a bunch of heavy dishes that did not complement each other the slightest. At this point I could go into the extravagant nature of those dishes and even ponder where their exotic ingredients came from, but I would rather not go down that rabbit hole right now.

At the end of the meal, which may or may not have concluded with a swift and merciless scolding, Judy and Elly solemnly declared that the results were a draw, then they promised to me that they wouldn't get carried away like that in the future.

"It's decided then! We are going on a group date on Sunday!" Elly declared with a fist pump while obviously getting carried away.

"You are making a scene," I chided her, prompting her to glance back at me over her shoulder with an apologetic smile, so I hastily added, "Pay attention while walking."

She blinked at me in surprise, but then she obediently turned back and continued whatever dastardly date plans she was in the process of hatching with the help of my dearest assistant while we walked. Wait, does this require some context? I suppose it does.

So, after we had our fill with our over-the-top lunch and shared some more much-needed exposition with Josh, I finally decided to stop delaying the inevitable, and so our little fellowship set out on a decidedly less-than-epic journey to meet the fabled arch-wizard of Blue Cherry High. Damn, my life is weird…

Anyways, in a great display of self-organizing chaos, our group naturally formed into three lines. On the forefront were Snowy and Angie, with Josh pushing his moped between the two of them as they shared even more vital information about the terrible dangers of the world of the supernatural masquerade, interspersed with random arguments about Trucy the Werewolf Huntress and some other shows I knew little about. In other words, business as usual.

Right behind them walked my two girlfriends, their discussion filled with a weird mixture of secretive harmony and sudden competitive outbursts. Also business as usual.

By process of elimination, that left me trailing behind them all with an especially sullen class rep at my side. Also, while I know the rule of three kind of demands it, but no, that wasn't business as usual, so I am not even going to pretend so. That said, this configuration meant that we have pretty much occupied the whole sidewalk, which actually made me acutely aware of something quite unusual… or rather, it was very normal, but because it was, it was not.

Okay, I stop beating around the bush: it was the placeholder population. When I told Elly to keep it down because she was drawing attention, I actually meant it. For maybe the first time since I could remember, the placeholders actually seemed to pay attention to us. No, before even that: they were actually on the street! I mean, I think I have already noted that the number of placeholders walking around and doing their business was increasing over time, but this early afternoon I felt like we crossed some kind of threshold; now the actual streets felt lived in. There was still not a speck of dust on the road or a stray piece of candy wrapper on the grass, so it still wasn't super authentic, but it was definitely more so than just a week or so before.

I couldn't help but wonder; was this supposed to be the natural progression of this world? We actually discussed this with Judy in the past, and she even had a theory about how maybe the world was a kind of simulation where it was supposed to run for a while for the placeholders to gather 'character' before the actual action or game or experiment or whatever this world was designed for was started. It was a somewhat elegant explanation of the rudimentary behavior patterns of the placeholders and their slow yet steady improvement on that front, but it still presupposed that the world was designed, or at the very least had some intent behind it, something of which I still wasn't one hundred percent certain.

As I was having these thoughts, I couldn't help but shake my head in irritation. There was still so little I knew about this world or dream or simulation or something, and unfortunately, it seemed like any earnest research would have to be put on hold once again, at least until I could make sure our lives and well-being weren't threatened by the plot. Speaking of which, I also reminded myself for the umpteenth time to pay attention to my own thought processes to catch any signs of some kind of narrative meddling in action. Regrettably, knowing that my own thoughts can be sneakily tweaked by an unseen force was not particularly comforting, and paying attention to every stray brainwave only made the stress worse.

"Haaahhh…"

And then the girl with the glasses by my side started letting out dramatic sighs like that! For a while, I actually hesitated whether or not I should ask or play dumb and avoid a potential landmine, but by this point I had a feeling she was doing it just to get me to ask, so I let out a shallow breath of my own and decided to bite it.

"Why the long face?" I asked tentatively, only for her to immediately turn towards me with a frown.

"I still don't understand how you figured it all out!" Ammy complained, earning a confused look from me.

"You mean, about Josh? Didn't I already tell you?"

"But it still makes no sense," she grumbled as she put her hands into her coat pockets. "If these prophecies were secret, then how do you know about them? Don't tell me it's 'I'm an information broken' again…"

"Nah, I just asked." She didn't seem convinced, so I explained, "Elly told me about the prophecy on her own. Then when I talked with Angie, we talked about their hallowed leader and their prophecy came up during that, and then I asked Snowy if they had something similar the next time we talked."

"Yeah, I wanted to ask about that too!" she interjected while her brows somehow descended even further. "How did you even know Angeline was a Celestial? And for how long?"

I couldn't give an immediate answer this time, as it involved some meta-logic, so after a few seconds I shrugged and deflected with a non-committal, "It was fairly obvious."

"What do you mean 'fairly obvious'?" Ammy practically hissed at me. "I've known her since middle school, and I never even suspected her!"

At this point the words 'She is called ANGELine!' were on the tip of my tongue, but I managed to swallow them back with inhuman effort, and instead I told her, "That just shows that I'm exceptionally good when it comes to deduction."

"Sure, just dodge the question," Ammy grumbled and rolled her eyes at me. "You are being 'exceptionally good' at that too. In fact, you are being too exceptional at too many things."

"Am I?" I asked back just a little uncertainly, which earned me a sudden, but by no means unexpected, harrumph.

"Do I have to spell it out?" I immediately nodded, so she explained to me in a weary voice. "Just to list the most glaring ones: you fought a Faun General and won. You fought a Chimera and killed it. You faced a Lord of the Abyss and you lived to tell the tale. On top of that you have money, the looks, your background is simultaneously too normal and yet mysterious, and while you are dangerously knowledgeable about all the Old Blooded, you do not belong to any of them."

"W-Well," I stammered for a moment, "To be fair, I can't really do anything about the looks department, but thanks for the compliment."

"And there you are, grabbing onto the most insignificant thing to change the direction of the conversation. I'm not even mad at this point, only disappointed."

"Ouch, class rep. That hurt. Mentally. Also, you are waaay more grouchy than usual."

"I think I said this before, but just to reiterate: Whose fault do you think that is?" She paused for a long moment, apparently waiting for me to say something, but since I remained silent she simply shook her head and said, "Let me stress this one more time: You killed a Chimera. Those are supposed to be so rare they are more or less legendary at this point, and even grandfather would've had a tough time facing one. Do you have any idea how much effort it took me to sort that mess out?"

"Hey, I didn't do it to cause you trouble!" I defended myself. "Also, it was a team effort. I can distinctly remember a certain girl's golem thingie contributing quite a bit. Not to mention, I wasn't the one who brought the bloody thing over. If you want to blame someone for all that happened, blame Crowey, not me. "

"Fine, you are right," she admitted with a voice that said she was still quite cranky. "But you being right doesn't change the fact that I still have mountains of paperwork to deal with when I go home today, and about half of it is because you—"

"Okay, time out!" I cut her short while signaling the same thing with my hands. "You keep saying that, but why are you doing paperwork in the first place?" Instead of answering me, she gave me one of those classic uncomprehending looks you would show when someone asked you which cereal flavor was your favorite mode of transportation, so I quickly reiterated, "I mean, why are you, in particular, doing paperwork? You are what? Sixteen?"

"So are you," she retorted with another frown, but I dismissed her with a wave of my hand.

"Seventeen on paper, but it doesn't matter. We are talking about you. I'm sure you have other people at the School who could deal with paperwork, so why are you doing it?"

This time the look she gave me was a bit more pensive, even hesitant, but after a quick glance at the front of our little procession, she seemed to finally reach a decision and gestured for me to come closer.

"Before I tell you the details, I have a quick question for you. Do you know what happened at Cardiff?"

"Cardiff?" I repeated after her. I naturally knew what she was talking about, as it was the notorious 'Cardhouse incident' that was, among other things, my primary cover as Admin over at the Celestial Hub. "Well, unless this is a trick question, the main thing that comes to mind is the incident when the Celestials tried to infiltrate a School and got caught red-handed. It was about three or so months ago, right?"

Amelia's face momentarily slackened in surprise, apparently not expecting me to actually answer her question, but then her expression quickly switched again as she nodded.

"Correct," she stated, then after a second or so she added, "I'll be damned. Maybe you are an informant after all…"

"That's neither here nor there," I spoke dismissively. "But back to the original question: what does what happened at Cardiff have to do with paperwork?"

"More or less everything," she told me accompanied by a tired groan. "Before Cardiff, a lot of the more mundane operations of the Schools were done by normal humans. The Celestials used this hole in our security to plant spies in our administration. Not only that, they have been doing it for at least two generations."

"Yeah, they are sly like that. Almost disturbingly so," I spoke carelessly, earning me an approving grunt from Ammy.

"They are," she said while making another sneak peek at a certain overly enthusiastic girl in the front, who was in the process of trying to convince Snowy to read some romance book about a friendly wight or something, like she didn't have a care in the world. Anyways, Ammy soon turned back to me and said, "So, as per the usual habit of the Assembly, they quickly threw the baby out with the bathwater and created a new law so that sensitive documents can only be handled by Magi directly related to the leadership of the School in question."

"And that's you," I guessed.

"Indeed," she answered with a mixture of exhaustion and indignation. "Since I'm grandfather's only blood relative, I have to do literally all the important accounting in the School, which includes things such as, let's say, someone killing a Chimera on School grounds."

"I get it, geez," I rolled my eyes at her barbed words, "Would you have preferred if I let it eat someone?"

"No," she denied immediately, but then she added, "Do you have any idea how much paperwork would that have caused!?"

I blinked at her response, unable to decide whether she was serious or not, but since her expression didn't lighten even after a couple of seconds, I lightly cleared my throat and cautiously told her, "… Class rep, I think you really need to take a break. I can't help but feel that doing all that accounting might've ever so slightly maybe partially mostly or at the very least totally consumed your entire thought process."

"And whose fault do you think—?"

"Yes, yes, it's my fault," I hastily admitted lest she would go on another tirade. Ammy only huffed, and I was afraid she would continue to complain if not for the fact that we were just a stone's throw away from the school's main gates. Seeing that, she only gave me a flat glance, and then she began jogging to get to the front of the group, leaving me all alone at the back. Not for long though, as after a few seconds my two girlfriends decelerated and fell in line on my two sides.

"We are going on a date this Sunday," Judy immediately informed me.

"Just the two of you? Oh well, have fun."

"Of course not," Elly countered with a small frown. "It's all three of us."

"I know, I was kidding," I stressed before rolling my eyes. "However, could we discuss this after we talked with the Magi? You know, just in case things get messy and there would be no time for any dates at all?"

"True," Judy spoke up with a decidedly disapproving tone. "You have already tempted fate, so it's far from impossible."

"Oh, please. Don't tell me you actually believe in superstition like that?"

"It's not about superstition, Chief," my dear assistant explained. "As far as we know, tempting fate like that could be very real. I believe you even mentioned that you already considered that things like 'rules of comedic and dramatic timing' were actual, tangible things.

"Well, I suppose I did…" I spoke carefully while thinking hard about how to explain myself. "However, you see, Josh had already done it, right? Therefore, if jinxing is a thing and something bad happens because of it, it will be his fault, and me following his example would have little significance. However, if jinxing is not a thing, then it doesn't matter if I did it as well, as nothing would happen either way. See, it's quite logical."

"That sounds like ad-hoc rationalization to me," Judy grumbled flatly

"Rubbish! I am always the model of a rational mind," I scoffed in return.

"Is it a scale model?"

"Of course. If it wasn't, it wouldn't fit into my head."

"I see. I learn something new every day."

"What are you talking about?" Elly interjected with a confused expression.

"Nothing serious," I reassured her while I simultaneously glanced up the hill towards the school gates, and after a short while my brows involuntarily furrowed. "Jokes and jinxes aside, what should I be expecting once we are in the School? What's Ammy's grandpa like?"

"I don't think I ever met him," Judy stated after quickly returning to her usual expression. "I think he might've given a speech at the opening ceremony, but my memories from back then are a little vague."

"Wait, hold on," I spoke up in a hurry. "So he is actually the headmaster of the school as well? I mean, I knew he was the head of the School, but not the school."

"That was confusing," Elly said while grimacing, and I couldn't help but agree with her. Just whose bright idea was to call the hub of a magical secret society operating under a school a 'School'?

"Anyways, I didn't even go to the opening ceremony, so I don't think I've ever seen the guy."

"You have seriously never met Lord Endymonion before?" Elly asked in a somewhat baffled voice, but she wasn't nearly as surprised as I was.

"Lord Endymonion? Really?"

"Yes, that's his name," she told me like it was really obvious. "I've known him since I was a kid. Our family had to pay him a visit every time we came to Critias."

"Figures. But why 'Lord'?"

"All the Arch-mages of the Assembly are called lords," Judy answered my question immediately while giving me a look saying 'That's common knowledge, didn't you read any of the reports I gave you?!'

"Oh, right," I spoke while scratching my chin, "It totally slipped my mind for a moment."

It was at this very moment when we reached the gates, which then promptly opened, cutting our already less than fruitful discussion short. At first I thought it was automatic, but then from behind the gap, my eyes met with those of Armband Guy.

He looked exactly the same as usual; his black hair cropped short, his small, round glasses sitting high on his hawkish nose, his cheeks sullen and giving him a gaunt appearance, and he was wearing his uniform as impeccably as ever, with a bright red band on his right arm. He looked over us before his eyes landed and stayed on Ammy.

"Hello Pascal," she greeted him, and the guy returned it with a small nod. "Please inform grandfather we are going to visit him."

"I see you found the Abyssal," he stated with a disinterested voice. "I suppose you want to talk with him about her."

"Yes, among other things," Ammy nodded, at which point Armband Guy gestured for us to come through the gates before he hastily closed them behind us.

After doing so, he faced our group again and simply said, "You know the way."

"Yes," the class rep nodded, at which point he returned to his duty of… standing by the gates. Weird.

Anyways, we waited for Josh to park his moped under the roof of the bicycle storage area, then once he was back, Ammy gestured for us to follow her. After a few steps, I carefully sidled up next to her and asked, "What's that guy's deal?"

"Pascal's?" she asked back, and I gave her a nod. "What do you mean? He was the same as usual."

"I get it, but… Is he actually a student? I mean, classes are still in, and he is just standing out there like that?"

"He takes his Student Council duties very seriously."

"That wasn't what I was…" I began, but then I shook my head. "You know what? Never mind."

Ammy looked at me funny, but before she could ask, I pulled the breaks so that I ended up next to Judy again and I told her in a whisper, "Raise Armband Guy from placeholder to a possible side character."

"Way ahead of you," she answered while showing me her phone.

"Good," I told her with a nod, then I followed after Ammy towards our destination, which seemed to be the entrance of the basement of the school.

"This way," she told us as she stopped right in front of the fairly mundane metal doors. "The staff might be a little jumpy after what happened on Sunday, so don't touch anything, don't be too loud, and don't bother anyone we meet. Are we clear on that, everyone? Leo?"

"Hey!" I raised my voice in indignation. "Why am I singled out?"

"You know why," the class rep told me while doing that thing where she adjusted her glasses for emphasis, but before I could argue with her, she turned around and opened the door with a metallic clank, and since no one else spoke up for me, I had no choice but to silently swallow the injustice as I followed behind the others into the secret base of the local supernatural superpower.

"I'm not going to lie, I feel a little underwhelmed. Am I the only one who feels underwhelmed?"

Ammy let out a small groan and asked, through clenched teeth, "Fine, I bite. Why are you underwhelmed?"

"Well…" I began as I gestured towards the smooth white metal walls of the spacious, well-lit elevator in which we were currently standing. "For a start, we just kind of walked up to the lift. It was right by the basement entrance too. It wasn't even hidden behind a fake wall or anything. It was just there."

"Why would you hide an elevator when people are using it every day?"

"She's got a point there," the princess noted by my side.

"But… why is it a lift in the first place? And a totally normal one too! I thought we were going to use a teleportation circle or something."

"Yeah." This time Josh was the one who spoke up, taking my side for once. "Using an ordinary elevator to meet a wizard totally takes the sense of adventure out of it."

"The proper term is Arch-mage, not wizard," Ammy countered politely, then she readjusted her glasses as she glanced back at me and told me in a much less polite fashion, "Do you think teleport arrays grow on trees?! Setting one up would use up half of our quarterly budget! Not to mention, some of the people working down there, who cannot use mana, would not be able to move between the School and the surface without help. Do you think we have the manpower to have a senior Magi on transportation duty when an 'ordinary elevator' does the job just as well for a fraction of the cost?"

"Fine, I get it! Geez!" I cut in with a groan, but then I suddenly remembered something and then I asked, using a slightly more diplomatic tone, "Just for the record, is teleportation really that costly?"

"Of course it is," Ammy scoffed. "Do you think breaking space itself and then mending it afterward is easy? You need a lot of rare reagents to create the arrays, then you would need two senior Magi to link them, and then whenever you would want to use them, you would need to use more valuable reagents. Why do you think only grandfather uses one to go back and forth between here and Glasgow for the Assembly meetings?"

"Well, I didn't know that, that's why I asked," I defended myself, and to my surprise, the class rep seemed to take a proverbial step back in reaction.

"You are right, I suppose."

"I have another question though," I told her, and she looked up at me attentively, so I inquired, "In theory, let's say that someone I knew had an artifact that can teleport them and other people they are in contact with to a predetermined location, no matter where they are. Is that a big deal?"

"A big deal?" Ammy asked back with eyes wide open. "An artifact? You mean an object with an array on it? Is it single-use?"

"Let's say it is," I muttered uncertainly, earning me an irritated scowl in the process.

"What do you mean 'let's say it—' … You know what, I don't even care. Now, to answer your question: even if it was just a single-use item, it would probably cause an uproar big enough to get not only the Assembly, but even the Celestials and the NSRS involved."

"The what now?"

"The Non-causative Science Research Society," Judy helpfully added.

"Father calls them 'the nerds'," came the next, slightly less helpful addendum from my other girlfriend.

"Hey, we call them that too!" Angie said next, though her addition was decidedly less useful to the conversation.

Anyways, I turned to Judy and told her, "Thank you. Also, ixnay onyay ethay eleportationtay artifactyay."

At first she gave me a weird look, but then there was a sudden spark of recognition in her eyes and she quickly took out her phone to follow my instructions.

"Was that pig latin?" Josh asked with a critically raised eyebrow, but before I could answer, the elevator shuddered as it came to a sudden halt. I had no idea whether it was slow, or we were going really deep, but considering I could feel my ears popping, my bet was on the latter.

Either way, once the lift door opened, I found myself staring down a long corridor with walls made of tightly packed stones of various shapes and sizes, kind of like a castle wall. On the other hand, the floor and the domed ceiling looked like they were made of solid white marble, and the whole place was evenly lit by a series of amorphous crystals glowing with a gentle blue light set in what at first glance looked like wrought iron torch sconces. On either side, I could see several large, elaborately designed wooden doors with huge brass handles, most of them closed, and while I couldn't see anybody, based on the faint noises I could hear, I was sure there were quite a few people down here.

"Now we are talking," Josh took the words right out of my mouth, so all I could do was to nod in agreement.

Sure, the place was still way too pristine to feel like an authentic ancient subterranean vault, but with the glowing crystals and the torch sconces, at least we finally had some ambiance.

"You guys are weird," Angie murmured.

"A few more things: keep your voices down, don't make a ruckus, and turn off your phones before we enter into grandfather's study," Ammy spoke up as she stepped out of the elevator and gestured for us to follow, and we somehow formed into a line as we walked down the corridor. Honestly speaking, I was still a little bit underwhelmed. I mean, this was supposed to be the headquarters of the de-facto supernatural big boss of the island, and it wasn't even a smidgen as grandiose as, say, the Dracis mansion. Even the security seemed pretty lame, as there were only two of those green eye orb things in the opposite ends of the hallway.

While I was paying attention to those, I didn't notice Judy coming up to me right until she grabbed hold of my sleeve and tugged on it.

"Hm? Yes?"

She gestured for me to lean closer, so I did just that.

"Chief, I would like to add one more entry to Amelia's warnings," she whispered conspiratorially. "We are in the heart of Magi territory, and we are about to meet the most important Magi on the island. We already discussed your 'impulse control' problem before, so please try to dial it back and do not pick a fight with an arch-mage of the Assembly on his home grounds."

"Oh, come on, Dormouse!" I whispered back after a quick roll of the eyes. "I am not that irresponsible. Maybe if I was alone, sure, but I wouldn't drag you guys into a conflict like that even if I wasn't aware of the problem, and now that I am conscious of it, I will make sure to play nice."

"Good to know," my assistant told me, yet somehow I had a feeling I still didn't have her full confidence.

I couldn't explain myself any further, as we reached the biggest, heaviest door at the end of the hallway, and Ammy promptly knocked on it three times. After a long moment, I noticed a bunch of glowing white lines reminiscent of circuitry cascading across the surface of the wood, and a blink of an eye later the two wings of the door slowly yet steadily swung open without a sound.

I could hear Josh audibly gulp at my side, so I gave him a reassuring pat on the back. Surprisingly enough Snowy, who I thought would be the most nervous out of everyone present, seemed to be looking forward with a determined expression.

Once the door was more than half open, I could finally take a good look inside. When I did so, I couldn't help but find the place familiar; an octagonal room with a high ceiling, walls covered in bookcases and lit by blue crystals, and there was a single, heavy-looking mahogany desk in the back. On top of said desk, there were several white towers of office paper, along with an assortment of writing utensils and an honest-to-goodness old-timey typewriter. Aside from the one we entered, there was another entrance on our right, nearly lost between the bookcases, while the opposing wall on the left had a large cabinet with glass doors. I was half-expecting the musty scent of history in the air, but contrary to the fact that the books inside seemed old enough, all I could smell was a strange mixture of ink and some kind of sweet, possibly alcoholic fragrance.

Now, to be perfectly blunt, I've seen this room in the past, specifically when I was checking up on the class rep with my Far Sight, but I never connected the dots, probably because the occupant of this room never struck me as the grandfatherly type. Speaking of which...

"Come in, there is no reason to be shy," came the deep yet somehow whimsical voice of an elderly man from inside, and when we did so, he dramatically turned around in the huge, padded swivel chair behind the desk (which, by the way, didn't fit the theme of the rest of the study at all).

In general, he looked the same as I remembered from my Far Sight. Our friendly neighborhood arch-mage was a lean old man with a bushy yet inexplicably well-kempt beard and a pair of equally abundant eyebrows on a high forehead. He was also dressed in a baggy black robe, yet under it I could see a fairly ordinary brown business suit that even had a tie, and as if just to make his garbs even more eclectic, he was also wearing a white Panama hat on top of all that. I mean, I get the rest, but who the hell wears a hat indoors like that? For some reason, that outfit wound me right up, and I was just about to give the man a snappy remark when I caught myself and hastily closed my mouth.

I blinked twice while looking at the Arch-mage and used the couple of seconds of silence, during which the rest of the group entered the study, to observe him a bit more closely. His face… well, he had a kind of grandfatherly smile. A big, friendly, eminently punchable grandfatherly smile that made me want to give a piece of my mind to the smug sod, and… god damn, I really do have an impulse control problem around important people who could kick my ass in a second! What the actual bloody hell?!

I quickly closed my eyes, lest I would get even more winded up by the sight of the old man, after which I took a deep breath, held it in for a second, and then slowly exhaled. Once I did that, I felt marginally more collected, so I opened my eyes again. By then the whole gang was already inside the study, and I could just barely catch the old geezer mutter something under his breath, at which point I saw practically every surface in the room flash with the familiar circuitry-like patterns, after which the doors instantly closed behind us and simultaneously the lights in the room rose in intensity.

"Whoa," I heard Josh mutter under his breath, but I ignored him in favor of something weird I noticed.

I couldn't see it before, but now that the lighting conditions have significantly improved, I could tell that one of the old man's eyes was red. As in, not the actual iris, but the sclera around it, as if he had some nasty infection or got the blood vessels in his eye ruptured. The other eye seemed fine, but it was weird enough that I decided to ask about it once we were outside.

In the meantime, the Arch-mage lightly cleared his throat as he looked over us, only stopping when his eyes finally landed on Snowy.

"And so we meet again," he spoke in a pleasant voice that still made my skin crawl, but I grit my teeth and only moved half a step closer to the Abyssal girl, just in case. He didn't seem to notice, or mind, as he continued by telling her, "You have caused us quite a bit of headache, young lady."

"I'm sorry, sir," Snowy answered with her head down.

"I am certain you are," Lord Grandpa told her with a calculated smile, but then he glanced over us and let out a small chuckle. "Oh, but where did I leave my manners? I am known as Lord Amadeus Endymonion, head of the Timaeus School of Conjuration and Alteration."

"Amadeus?" the surprised question slipped out of my mouth before I could stop it, and the old guy immediately glanced at me with a questioning look in his eyes.

"Is there a problem?"

"None at all," I answered with a chipper voice that was only a tiny bit strained. "Absolutely nothing. Please ignore me, like I wasn't even here."

Lord Grandpa gave me a long, hard look, then his lips curved into a pleasant smile as he let out a series of mirthful chuckles into his closed fist.

"I am afraid ignoring a young man of your accomplishments would paint me in a bad light, but for now I shall do as you wish," he told me in particular before he turned back to Snowy. "First I believe we have to discuss what to do with you."

"About that," Ammy took a step forward as she spoke up. "I already talked with you about this, but Neige was not in control of her own actions. Also, as you can see, she came here of her own free will. I still believe she poses no harm to anyone."

"Yes, yes," the arch-mage repeated as he flashed a decidedly grandfatherly smile at his granddaughter. "You have already convinced me of that. However, I am afraid things are not so simple." Saying so, he reached out towards the seemingly haphazardly placed papers on the far corner of his desk, and after picking one up he pointedly looked it over before his attention returned to us. "Not simple at all. I understand you were forced into being an accomplice of your brother by an artificial contract geas. Is that correct?"

"Y-Yes," Snowy stammered as his attention returned to her.

"That would certainly invoke article ninety-four. No individual, be they a member of the Winged Races or human, be held responsible for the actions they were compelled to commit via the use of magical mind-alteration. Furthermore, coming here shows good faith in the fair judgment of the Magi."

"Indeed," Ammy spoke up with a serious expression. "Since you are the local representative of the Assembly, I would like to—"

"Hold on, dear child of mine," Lord Grandpa cut her short while simultaneously flicking his wrist so that the paper in his hand made a sound. "As I have already told you, the situation is far from simple. While these are indeed extenuating factors, we cannot forget about the actual victims of this incident."

After saying so, he lazily looked over Joshua, as if trying to memorize his every feature, then to my abject horror, he proceeded to do the same to me. Ugh. Thankfully his gaze returned to Josh just before I would have no longer been able to hold my distaste from spilling out of my mouth and he asked him, "Tell me, young man; as the victim of this attempted abduction, do you not blame your kidnapper?"

It was at this point I had just about enough with the old man's tone and I was about to cut in with indignation, but somehow Josh managed to be a split-second faster.

"Of course I do," he answered with a quiet yet firm voice. "Of course I blame him. But Lili… I mean, Neige was innocent. If anything, she was a victim, just like I was."

"Oh?" The old man's face practically lit up with a mirthful smile that strangely didn't reach his eyes. "How very unexpected. It is an answer that belongs to a generous heart. I wonder if your friend also agrees?" Saying so, his attention returned to me. "If I am not mistaken, you suffered some quite grievous injuries at the hands of the lady of the Abyss. Am I right to assume you also hold no hard feelings towards her, young man?"

"The name's Leonard," I answered with a growl before I even knew it. "Also, no, I naturally do not blame her for something that she had no bloody control over."

For a moment the old geezer's face froze up, but then his expression quickly returned to his previous grandfatherly visage as he let out a deep laugh that somehow made him look even more annoying than before. In the meantime I took several deep breaths to get my temper back under control, with only marginal success.

"You were right, my dear child," he spoke to Ammy once he stopped chuckling. "Your friend is truly a strange young man." I could distinctly feel that he was stressing the words 'young man', but I was still in the middle of my breathing exercise, so I managed to stay calm and not react in any overt way. Well, aside from a death-glare, but that was to be expected at this point. Anyways, he continued by saying, "So you two hold no ill feelings towards the lady of house Inanna. Very commendable. Not many youths of your age would be able to set aside their enmity so easily after such a traumatic event. However…"

At this point the old man had the gall to pause for dramatic effect, but I was in no mood to deal with his verbal bollocks, so I immediately echoed him.

"However?"

The geezer once again gave me an intrigued look, then he told us, or rather, based on how he was looking me in the eye, maybe just me in particular:

"Unfortunately, before the Lord of Inanna left to his domain in the Abyss, he thoroughly erased any and all traces he left on the records of the mundane authorities. Said records naturally included all kinds of identifications related to both him and the young lady over there." He paused again, giving me yet another one of those really annoying genial smiles, then he concluded with, "I am afraid she currently has no identity in the outside world. I believe I do not have to explain the implications of such a thing to your generation."

I could hear rustling behind me, and that just made me realize that somehow I ended up standing about one step ahead of the others, with them clustered behind me. I couldn't remember moving forward, so… were they the ones who moved behind me? It was a question for later, I decided, as I chose to move the conversation along by asking, "We understand. So, what is your angle?"

"Angle?" He repeated after me. "What a curious choice of words. Very well, I shall cut to the bone of the pleasantries and share with you the offer I prepared in advance, one which I believe shall prove quite beneficial for all of us."

"Go on," I urged him cautiously, at which point the old man took out another piece of paper from his pile.

"As I am quite sure you are all aware, it is well within my right to grant you asylum." He glanced behind me, presumably at Joshua. "This naturally applies to you as well, young man. As a victim of Abyssal violence, you are more than qualified to seek the protection of the Assembly." He paused, again, and flashed another jolly smile. "We can not only guarantee the safety of both you and your kin, but it might also serve as a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity as well. So long as you cooperate with us, I can promise you not only security, but a chance to enter into the ranks of our School with the backing of a Lord of the Assembly."

"What's the catch?" I cut in before Josh could be cajoled into a careless answer.

"The catch? What could you possibly mean?" the annoying geezer asked with an expression that said he was deeply hurt by my question. Yeah, I wish he was.

"You know exactly what I mean. There is no such thing as a free lunch in this world."

"True enough," the Arch-mage admitted, his façade of jovial benevolence finally showing a small crack as he frowned at me. "As a token of goodwill, I shall be honest with you. In order to protect your friend from any future Abyssal incursions, he would need to be kept under strict supervision. Furthermore, we believe the reason behind his kidnapping was far from a random act of malevolence by the Lord of Inanna, so we might need to subject him to certain, non-intrusive tests." On the last word he abruptly glanced behind me again, and based on the sharp gasp coming from behind me, he was probably looking at Snowy. Strangely enough, before I even knew it, I took half a step to the side, so that I was looking him in the eye again.

By this point I could see that the old man was getting irritated under the guise of his gentle smile, but I didn't really mind. Anyways, after softly clearing his throat, he said, "Of course, if the young lady of House Inanna would provide us with a proper explanation behind their unusual actions, such tests might be wholly unnecessary. Speaking of which, I naturally extend the same offer and courtesy to the young mister Bernstein as well." There was a long moment of silence in the room, during which the old man's countenance became decidedly less cordial, until he lightly cleared his throat and began, in a slightly strained voice, "Believe me when I say this: most of your peers would sacrifice much more than the small compromise I ask in compensation. It is also worth mentioning that, while the young lady might belong to one of the ruling families of the Abyss, by their very nature, the denizens of her realm do not condone open treachery, which her current situation would definitely qualify. As such, I believe it is in your best interest to consider my offer well, for her fate may be truly harrowing once his brother returns and—"

"Aaaaand you just cocked it up," I stated with a glover, eliciting a series of stifled gasps from the peanut gallery behind my back and a somewhat comical expression from the old man in front of me.

"Pardon?" he asked with an uncertain voice, and I couldn't help but scoff at him.

"You heard me right. You fucked up," I told him bluntly as I casually pocketed my hands and continued to give him a glare. "For a moment I almost considered your offer, but then you just had to take that extra bloody step and use some backhanded threats like that."

"Young man, this is no way to talk to your elders," he began, but I cut him short with a chortle and a slow shake of my head.

"Yeah, sure. I'm sooooo sorry for being rude to you, gramps. Because that is the main issue here, right?" I asked as my mouth slowly drew back in a smile that didn't feel like one at all. "Let's just ignore all the double-talk. Supervision? Non-intrusive testing? Small compromise? Do we really look like idiots to you? No, wait, don't answer that, I don't care after all."

"Young man, in your place I would be careful with my words…" the old guy suddenly spoke in a low tone, and as he did, the air around him was slowly suffused with an eerie white glow. I could once again hear the others rustle behind me in a hurry. As for me…

"I told you, the name is Leonard," I answered pointedly while locking eyes with the man and we both fell silent as we competed with each other's gaze.

The silent struggle lasted for a little more than five seconds. In the end, the old man let out a single, derisive laugh, his previous grandfatherly mannerism all but gone as he asked me, "Very well, Leonard," he stressed my name as his lips parted in a pretty menacing smile, and for a moment I felt like I was facing Sebastian. Even more surprisingly, that somehow made me feel slightly less irritated. I couldn't really ponder on the reason behind that though, as he continued, "No matter what I may or may not think of you, I believe you are forgetting your place. I have already explained my offer, now it's their turn to make their choice. Not yours."

"That would be true if you actually gave them a choice," I countered.

"Truly?" he asked back with a curiously raised eyebrow.

"Indeed. If the only two options given were 'live in peace as a guinea pig under our thumb' and 'face a constant threat of death', no one would ever pick the latter. Unfortunately for you, there are other choices out there."

"Such as?" he inquired with a somewhat amused expression. "The Dracis? True, with their influence, creating a new identity for the young lady would be easy, but are you certain they would help you? The price the pride of the dragon demands for its support is not something anyone can pay."

"Who talked about them?" I retorted with a shake of my head.

"If not the Dracis, then who do you have in mind? Who else is out there who could shelter them from harm? Could it be you believe you could do it all on your own?"

"Sure," I answered off-handedly. He gave me an odd look, so I added, "I'm pretty resourceful."

The old man's eyes opened wide of a moment, then he suddenly raised his hand to his mouth to stifle a laugh.

"Yes, I was told so," he finally said after he finished chuckling and then he fell silent for a few seconds, during which the ambient magical light around him finally subsided. He appeared to be in deep thought for a while longer, then he abruptly put the paper in his hand down and glanced behind me, calling out "Amelia?"

"Yes, grandfather?" the class rep replied with a somewhat unsteady voice. I really hoped it wasn't because she was shaking with anger over my behavior, but I knew better, so I let out a silent sigh and began to mentally prepare myself for a scolding.

Meanwhile, the old arch-wizard's face was once again set in a grandfatherly smile as he told her, "Be a dear and show your friends around the School. It has been so long since we had visitors like you, I am sure the others will be more than happy to show off the fruits of their research to a group of receptive minds." He paused for a beat, his eyes flickering between Josh and Snowy, or at least so I presumed, then he added, "As for your two, I wish to apologize for my forceful approach earlier. Please take your time and carefully consider your options. If you ever find yourself in trouble, my offer of asylum remains open for the both of you."

"I'll think about it," Josh muttered, his voice strangely weak for some inexplicable reason.

I was just about to grunt and follow after them, but then the owner of the study suddenly addressed me.

"As for my young friend, Leonard… Would you mind keeping me company until your friends return?" After saying that he gave me a huge, toothy smile that looked entirely wrong on his wrinkled face. "I believe we need to discuss some things, just the two of us."

I was a little taken aback by the sudden proposal, so I glanced over my shoulder to see what the others would say, and to my surprise I found them clustered around the door. Not only that, they were all deathly pale, including the class rep, who was the only one a little further away. As for the rest, it looked like Elly and Snowy were on their guard in the front, while Josh, Judy, and Angie were huddled together behind them.

I had a faint idea of what was going on so, after a short moment of hesitation, I flashed them a reassuring smile and told them, "Go on ahead, guys. You don't need to rush either; I'll be right here."

"Are you sure?" Elly asked back, with a drop of sweat rolling down the bridge of her nose.

"Yeah. Have fun," I answered with another carefree smile. The group seemed less than enthusiastic about leaving, but then Ammy finally took the helm and she began to hastily herd them out of the study across the slowly opening doors. Once outside, said doors immediately reversed their direction, and I could only catch a few worried glances from the other side before they closed again with a distinct thud.

As they did, I released a long breath and faced the old man behind the desk, whose face at this point was covered by a positively devious grin that was not even in the same ballpark as his previously amicable façade. Not to be left behind, I gave him an irreverent smirk of my own and asked, "Is it time for the real negotiations to start, Lord Amadeus?"

"Indeed it is," he answered with a sly glint in his eye, "Leonard Blackcloak."

"Blackcloak?" I repeated the arch-mage's words after an uncomfortably long pause.

"Indeed," he smiled mirthfully as he slowly stood up from his seat. "I wonder why you look so surprised?"

"Well, it wasn't something I expected to hear from you," I admitted, eliciting a self-satisfied chuckle from the old man.

"Truly? I believe your name is on the lips of countless people right now," he told me as he walked over to the cabinet on the left with leisurely steps. "You might be currently unaware, but you are quickly becoming a household name in the world of mystics." At this point the old man fell silent as his hand gently tapped on the side of the cabinet, which then flashed with the now-familiar patterns before swiftly opening, revealing an entire smorgasbord of liquors and spirits. "But before we start, can I interest you in a drink?" Saying so, he picked out a small, round bottle and showed it to me. "This is one of my latest acquisitions. It is an herbal liquor called Unicum. It is said to be a great digestif."

"I'm technically a minor," I answered him as bluntly as the broad side of an axe, but he only chuckled in return.

"Technically? A truly peculiar choice of words once again. But alas, it would be uncouth for me to leave the laws of the mundane world unobserved. I shall put some of this away in preparation, so that we may enjoy it in the future while reminiscing about this day," he mused as he poured some of the dark, thick liquid into an elaborately designed shot-glass before sealing the bottle and closing the cabinet, then he leisurely walked back to the desk, glass in hand, and after taking a small sip he turned to me and asked, "What shall we discuss first?"

I could only stifle a groan in response. The old man managed to grab the reins of the conversation right from the start, and I had no choice but to ask the obvious question to get it moving. It was truly infuriating, but I only let it slightly show on my face.

"I want to hear about this 'Blackcloak' thing first," I told him, and he immediately beamed at me with the countenance of a cat who just got a mouse walk right up to its mouth.

"It is a truly amusing story," he answered between two sips from his glass. "Believe it or not, the title itself comes from none other than the Lord of Innana himself."

"Really?" I frowned at the unexpected answer.

"Indeed. As they say, no denizen of the abyss can overcome their heritage; the deviousness of the Celestials and the pride of the dragons."

"That's kinda racist, but go on," I interjected, but my words didn't seem to faze the old man, as he did just that.

"Unlikely as it might have been at the time, the young Lord of House Innana came to me on his own, and he paid a substantial price to secure his own welfare on my lands. He wove a beautiful tapestry of cooperation and peace, but I naturally knew that he would have a hidden dagger behind his back." He paused for a moment, took another sip, and then he continued with a shameless smile. "I knew he would cause trouble, but curiosity won me over. Once you are my age, you will understand that there are not many things that can interest an old man, so I was not going to miss this opportunity to see something unusual. Of course, the materials he generously provided for research were a substantial boon in and of itself, so I reckoned I would not turn a loss even if he attempted to do something extravagantly unwise."

"Does trying to open a gate to the Abyss right on top of your School count as that?" I interjected, earning me another supremely grating chuckle.

"Indeed it does!" the old man agreed with me before tilting his head back to down the last of his drink. "His plan was by no means the work of a genius, but his preparations were thorough and careful. Of course, I also made my counter-measures in the shadows. It was a game I truly enjoyed, but to my eternal shame, I completely misread the gameboard. I thought he would try to break into my School, so I set an elegant collection of traps for him if I say so myself. I could not in my wildest dreams imagine he would completely ignore it in favor of kidnapping a seemingly ordinary young student. A serious blunder by any measures, I would say."

"Finally something we can both agree on," I answered his non-question, but instead of getting angry, the old geezer's smile only widened.

"Harsh words, but not unreasonable." After saying so, suddenly the arch-mage's eyes narrowed into a squint, which was actually a little bit unsettling, with his one red eye and everything. "However, in that moment of blunder, a group of youngsters presented themselves. My own granddaughter, a member of house Dracis, a hidden Celestial, and a pair of mundane youths, all of them working together as one. And on the forefront of this extraordinary event was none other than you, Leonard."

The way he slowly spoke my name made shivers run down my spine, but I didn't let it show on my face.

"That's all jolly fine, but what does it have to do with this 'Blackcloak' business?"

"Everything," he answered me with a mysterious glint in his still narrowed eyes. "As I have told you, the denizens of the Abyss are ruled by their stubborn pride as much as their ancestors, and none more so than the Lords themselves. Come on, lad; try to put yourself in his shoes for but a moment! Imagine you craft a most elaborate plan in order to gain both prestige and a profit for yourself, yet at the last moment, all your preparations are made naught by an eclectic group of children! Not only that, but you lose a rare beast, your sister, and your very dignity to them in the process! What would you do?"

"… Is this a trick question?"

"No, I am quite serious," the old man told me, though his weird grin made the validity of his statement a little questionable. "Go on, share your thoughts!"

For a few long seconds I only gave the expectant old man a wry look, but then I let out a tired breath and resigned myself to fall into his pace once again.

"Fine, let me think. … So I got beaten by a group of high-schoolers, all my plans are FUBAR, and the rest of the Abyss is watching me for signs of weakness. I suppose the first step is damage control."

"Such as?"

"I would either make the loss seem less significant than it was, or hide it altogether. Since you told me I somehow became a 'household name' or whatever, I guess it wasn't the latter. In fact, it almost seems like…" I paused for a moment as I realized something, and for a moment I almost forgot to breathe. "Please don't tell me he did what I think he had done?"

"Oh, I am afraid you are most likely correct in your deduction," Lord Punchable told me with a shit-eating grin plastered on his face. "He must have also realized that he couldn't keep his failure a secret for long, so he did something unexpected and told a new story. It was a tale where he was lured into a devious trap, devised by his treacherous sister, the heiress of the venerated Dracis family, the genius granddaughter of my humble self, an operative of the Celestial intelligence, and led by a certain Leonard Blackcloak, the Chimera Slayer. Quite an illustrious title, if I may say so."

"Oh, you've got to be shitting me!" I exclaimed in frustration, but the old man only chuckled at my display of indignation.

"I am afraid not. News like this travel fast among the mystics, and when those news come directly from the mouth of a Lord of the Abyss and his loyal retainers, they do so even faster. It is actually quite ingenious, would you not agree? With just a few rumors, the Lord of Inanna turned his shameful defeat into a daring escape from the grasp of his traitorous sister and her alliance of powerful accomplices."

I took a few seconds to bury my head in my palm, then after I felt reasonably calm, I simply stated, "I swear, next time I see that son of a bitch, I'll beat him to within an inch of his life!"

"Oh my," the annoying arch-mage shook his head with an amused expression. "No wonder people think highly of you. Few would dare to threaten a Lord of the Abyss like that, even behind closed doors." He paused for a second, probably just to see if I would find some more colorful expletives to express my distaste, but since I was silent, he ultimately crossed his fingers on the table and said, in a slightly more serious tone, "Exaggeration aside, I believe the rumors about you are still just that; truth magnified by design. They could not exist without a kernel of truth, and you have killed a Chimera, have you not?"

"Well, yes," I grudgingly admitted. "But I didn't do it alone, and it sure as hell wasn't as easy as a walk in the park."

"I would be quite troubled if it was," gramps stated with a small laugh in his voice. "However, the fact that you did is not only remarkable in and of itself, your actions on that peculiar night not only foiled a plan of the Abyss, but you also helped our School avoid humiliation. For this, I would sincerely thank you."

"You are welcome," I stated dourly, though he didn't seem to mind

"However, as thankful as I am, there are some things I find hard to overlook." Saying so, he casually reached into the pile of papers and produced yet another sheet, without even looking. At this point I was fairly certain those pages didn't have anything to do with any of this and he only waved them around for showmanship. Anyways, he continued, "A remarkable young man like you should have been known to me, would you not agree? Yet here you are; one day a mundane student with an unusual group of friends, and the next day a fabled Chimera Slayer and the sworn enemy of a Lord of the Abyss. Yet, when I attempted to look into your history, I found nothing. Average parents. Average grades. Average interests. A truly average person, who is at the same time a hero. How curious. So, I let my curiosity take the better of me once again and I inquired about you from my granddaughter and your Celestial friend. You know what they said? Smart. Daring. Strong. Reliable. A born leader. Calm under pressure. A real—"

"Could we skip the part where you try to butter me up and get to the damn point?"

"The point, my young friend, is that I found you interesting even before we first met. But now…" He didn't finish his sentence, instead he pulled out a drawer and took out a large manila envelope.

"You see, young Leonard, this was something I prepared ahead of time, but I was not sure whether I should give it to you. I could not be sure whether I could trust the rumors about you. Whether I could trust you. But alas, the curiosity of an old man, once ignited, is hard to quench." The old guy grinned at me again and placed the envelope on the desk. "Please consider this as a small token of my appreciation, and maybe a something of an investment."

I cautiously eyed the packet for a few seconds before asking, "What's in it?"

The Arch-mage's lips widened even further, like a fisherman who just got a huge catch on his hook, which made me quite uncomfortable, considering I was the fish in this analogy.

"I was told you wished to protect the peace of this city in general and the lives of your friends in particular. In this envelope, you will find a number of leads that might point your eyes towards potential threats to that peace. What you do with them is entirely up to your discretion."

"… So your idea of a 'token of appreciation' is giving me leads to some kind of supernatural trouble so that I would have to deal with it instead of you?"

"Indeed."

"And you expect me to just take it?"

"Can you afford not to?"

For a second or five I stared daggers at the old man, but no matter how I looked, his friendly, grandfatherly smile never wavered. I was still hesitant, but then he tilted his head to the side like a curious cocker spaniel, so I let out a long and pained groan and reached out towards the envelope.

"Crafty son of a bitch."

"Now, now. There is no reason to lose your guise of civility," he told me with another chuckle that made me want to roll up the package in my hand and stuff it down his throat, but then his expression finally lost the grin and he told me, "You might also consider this a test. I have a feeling that you and I should be able to enter into a mutually beneficial relationship, but I want to see your talents first-hand. Who knows? Maybe one day we may even work together as equals?"

"I sincerely doubt that will ever happen," I hissed through clenched teeth as I took a step towards the door.

"We shall see. For the time being, I shall keep a close eye on you."

Hearing those words, I stopped mid-step and whipped my head around to give the man a glare.

"So long as you keep those eyes out of my home," I told him in a voice so cold it even surprised me. Even more surprisingly, the old man's smile abruptly twitched, which he immediately tried to cover up with an embarrassed cough.

"Duly noted," he awkwardly told me. In the meantime I reached the door, and he quickly added, "I shall open the way."

"Don't stand up, I'll let myself out," I told him.

"I do not actually have to—" he began, but then I placed my hand on the entrance and pushed.

It didn't seem to work at first, so I tried again, harder, and when I did, I could feel a familiar, numbing buzz at the fingertips, following which the door made a clicking sound and swung right open. The strange part was that, unlike before, only one wing of the door moved. For a moment I was afraid I broke something, so I glanced back at the old man, but he was only looking at me with a wooden smile, so I hastily grunted something that could, under certain circumstances, be interpreted as a goodbye, and then carefully closed the door behind me.

It was only after I was sure that the door stayed closed that I let out a long breath in relief. It didn't last long though, as the irritation quickly crept back into my mind the moment I glanced at the manila package in my hand. I stared it hard for a couple of seconds, my frustration growing until it burst out with a subdued "Damn…" under my breath.

I was pissed. No, I was more than pissed. I was totally, irrationally enraged. The old sod led me by the nose through practically the entire discussion, if you could call it that, and he even tossed some extra work on my shoulders with an excuse of it being a 'test'! Test my bloody arse! I had more than enough problems on my plate! I came here to fix some of them, not to get even more heaped on me! Bollocks!

Meanwhile, as I quietly fumed while my fingers on the hand holding the envelope went white with exertion, the lift door on the other end of the hallway opened. To my sincerest surprise, I found the rest of my little band of misfits on the other side. I naturally attempted to walk over to them, but before I could even take two steps, I was practically tackled by a certain blonde dragon girl.

"Leo! Are you all right!? Are you hurt anywhere!?"

"I wasn't, until you head-butted my spleen," I grumbled while massaging my stomach.

"Sorry, but that's beside the point!" she told me while she frantically patted me down, and before I knew it, a certain Celestial girl also joined the fray.

"Let me look at him! I'm better at this!"

Saying so, she grabbed hold of my wrist and began humming, which was the straw that broke the proverbial camel's back.

"Would you just calm down and let me go already?" I growled as I snatched my wrist out of Angie's grasp. "What's wrong with all of you?"

"Chief, are you sure you are all right?" Judy joined in, prompting me to groan in exasperation.

"Of course I'm fine."

"Good, then please lean forward a bit."

"Um, sure?" I replied somewhat suspiciously, and when I did so, my girlfriend suddenly caught hold of my ear and twisted it.

Now, to be perfectly honest, as with most of her attempts at physical violence, Judy somehow managed to accomplish that without hurting me the slightest, but I felt obliged by the situation, so I gave her a confused "Ouch?"

"Chief, what did I tell you about picking a fight with an Arch-mage of the Assembly in the middle of his School?"

"I didn't pick a fight!" I protested. "I was only looking out for Josh and Snowy."

"It doesn't change the fact that you made him angry."

"Right!" Angie piled on while she grabbed hold of my wrist again. "I was more scared for our lives than when we met that Chimera for the first time!"

"It was hard to breathe, like there was a mountain on my chest," Snowy agreed, her face still pale.

"Snowy's brother had something similar going on, but I would face him a hundred times over meeting with Ammy's grandpa ever