LIGHTNOVELONLINE Chapter 220
Chapter: 220
“I’ll save you.”
She repeatedly replayed the voice that made her realize love and led her to decide on death.
Could it be because she was already dead?
She could easily pull out feelings she always had to forcibly suppress.
“I wanted to do more with you – to see and talk about many things, to know everything you like and dislike.”
Perhaps it was a kind of affection chosen as an escape from a terrible situation. Maybe it wasn’t even the same feeling as love between lovers.
“I wanted to confirm.”
Was it really love? Or was she just mistaken?
She wanted to find the answers to the questions that those who first realize love reflexively spit out – with him.
…She didn’t want to die.
“Ugh…”
Overwhelmed by surging emotions, she collapsed. Even without a body, the suffocating nausea bubbling up from her solar plexus tightened her throat.
Feeling like she might vomit something, she discovered a thud on the floor.
“Ah…”
When she touched her cheeks, she felt a damp sensation. It was as if she had just hatched from an egg – something she hadn’t noticed until just now.
Her tears were lukewarm, and her body was cold.
Silently hugging her knees and burying her head, she felt a wave of relief wash over her. It was a welcome comfort to spill emotions she had been forcibly ‘stabilizing’ rather than questioning the sudden warmth and sensation.
Her repressed despair and sadness flowed out.
In this reality, even though she shed tears, her eyes didn’t swell, and she didn’t have trouble breathing. So the tears flowed endlessly.
After shedding a fair amount of tears, she realized some force was forcibly stabilizing her emotions. At the same time, she realized this place was where she let go of her last lingering attachments before death.
As she thought about going through the process of accepting everything after being angry and sad in this unknown space with no tomorrow, a sticky despair crept back into her throat.
Here, where not a single hope existed, time felt like purgatory. Nonetheless, she kept yearning for life, craving love, and thinking of Lian.
“Hah…?”
While aimlessly letting time flow, she suddenly snapped back to reality like splashing cold water on her face.
“Why am I…?”
Warmth?
While she hadn’t warmed back to her original temperature, there was definitely some warmth returning. Unknowingly, she held her neck tightly and held her breath.
Perhaps, just maybe—
Any thoughts of feeling even the faintest pulse shattered quickly. There was no pulse, nor even a drop of the magic she used to breathe.
Just as hope was about to be colored by despair again—
“…!”
She shivered like she had been electrocuted, gasping for air.
“Lian…?”
Her dulled senses slowly expanded, and suddenly, he was there. His soul felt near enough to touch – so clear, she couldn’t deny it.
Ellensia immediately sprang up and moved toward the place where she sensed Lian.
‘There!’
Beyond the white wall where her memories were displayed like exhibits, Lian’s soul was felt in sharp focus. Taking a deep breath, she steeled herself.
‘…If I leave this place, I might wander until my soul wears away.’
Stepping off the predetermined path to death was like giving up a calm ending.
Her fists clenched tightly as her nails pressed into her palms.
‘Still… I’m going to his side.’
Hot affection filled her eyes.
Bang!
Without a hint of hesitation, her clenched fist struck the wall. A tremendous sound echoed.
Boom, thud! Boom, crash!
If that didn’t work, she’d try again — hitting until she did. With this mindset, she struck like a madwoman, and cracks began to form on the white wall.
Creeeak, crack!
The wall, which had begun to crack like an old building, soon couldn’t withstand the force.
Rumble!
Part of it crumbled away. Beyond the collapsed wall lay an entirely black space where the floor, ceiling, and walls were indistinguishable.
Ellensia immediately leaped over the fallen wall and threw herself into the dark space.
Thud.
Fortunately, the floor of the black space was at the same height as the white space.
‘This is… Unknown Place?’
Like being trapped in a darkness without a speck of light, she couldn’t distinguish her surroundings. Yet, her body appeared vivid as if under a bright sun. Just as she was momentarily flustered by this bizarre sensation, she felt Lian’s soul fading away and snapped into action.
“Lian!”
*
At that very moment when Ellensia was urgently looking for Lian, Lian was trudging through an endless space, wiping his face repeatedly.
‘How am I supposed to face the kids? Aaah…’
As Lian’s body sat in the true ‘Divine’ position, the part that could be called his source or ‘soul’ was flung into the darkness, where it couldn’t see an inch ahead.
Unaware of this situation, Lian fainted when his wrist was grabbed by his own limp body, only to wake up in a strange and eerie place, feeling bewildered.
‘Where am I?’ Just as the question popped up, memories began to invade his mind.
His childhood, falling in love for the first time under Noah’s care.
His student days, yearning for ‘family’ as he leaned on Jess.
His college days, spending sweet times with Iris as they dreamed of the future.
Sweet memories that hadn’t existed inscribed themselves in his mind like a delightful dream, making his face burn with embarrassment.
After some time, when he finally calmed down, he began aimlessly wandering in the darkness, where up, down, front, and back were indistinguishable.
At first, he rushed his steps, worried about others, but at some point, he fell into deep thought, moving as if he were strolling. His head was simply too complicated.
Not being able to distinguish what was genuine memory, he took his time organizing his thoughts, walking for what felt like an eternity. Strangely, he didn’t feel tired or sore, and before he knew it, quite a bit of time seemed to have passed.
‘Maybe not even an hour has gone by… Haha.’
With no sun rising or setting, and the scenery around him changing, his feeling that a lot of time had passed was merely his personal sentiment.
As he walked an endless path, a primal fear suddenly surged, but he swiftly shook it off. He knew well that fear wouldn’t help at all in a situation like this.
Besides, he had countless experiences far worse than this, so shedding that fear wasn’t difficult.
Lian began to walk again, lost in thought.
Slowly following his memories back to his past, he soon connected his recollections to when he first opened his eyes in the dark fantasy world.
‘Back then, I really lived without a care.’
As he stumbled upon the term ‘just barely getting by,’ he realized just how potent the power of comedic abilities had truly been.
The memories slowly rising to the surface played a role similar to a reel of film, reflecting on his life, allowing him to recognize facts he hadn’t noticed before and leading him to repent of his mistakes.
Having lived in such a chaotic world, Lian’s judgment regarding his ‘crimes’ had become lax. Thanks to that, his expression shimmered with nostalgia like an old man flipping through an album.
“Iris was so cute when she was little. I thought she’d be beautiful when she grew up… but I never imagined she’d be that stunning.”
“Ugh… even now, it leaves me breathless to think about it. I never expected Noah to be a girl. He was quite the drinker too…”
“I thought Jess would grow up just being cute. Well, she’s a beastkin, so it’s not like she’s a… regular human or anything.”
As the memories drifted further back, the intensity grew, and his previously relaxed expression morphed into that of a child caught in misconduct.
Blushing and rolling his eyes, Lian shook his head and made an effort to think of others.
The kids and executives he had worked with in the Nest organization, Iris’s mother the Duchess, and the Duke’s knights.
He began recalling those he had connections with one by one. As he did, the feelings and thoughts he held began to crystallize clearly.
“Ah…”
Things that had been invisible began to come into clear focus.
‘Goodness…’
Lian briefly stopped walking and covered his face with both hands.
‘W-Well, this is… Hah…’
Shame and guilt kept his feet glued to the spot.
‘I had an inkling, and I expected it, but—’
As he wiped his face and involuntarily shouted out loud.
“No way, I’m way too easygoing!”
Noah, Jess, Iris – and the Demon King Ellensia who showed endless affection.
Lian finally realized he was genuinely in love with four women at once.