Heart of Dorkness

Bane Two - Sleepover

“Mom!” I called out, my voice echoing down the corridor, soon followed by the patta-patta of my feet before I crashed into Mom hug-first.

“Hello Valeria,” Mom said. She idly ran her hands over my head. “Did you have a good night?”

“Yeah. It’s nice to be back home,” I said as I pulled back a little, just enough to read her expression. She seemed happy too. “Felix and Esme slept in my room, is that okay?”

“It defeats the point of insisting that they have their own rooms, but I don’t see the harm in it,” Mom said. “Why, exactly, did you all sleep in the same room?”

“It was a sleepover,” I explained. “And I don’t want my friends to feel uncomfortable. Plus you have sleepovers all the time, no?”

One of Mom’s eyebrows rose up, and I realized my mistake.

Adults didn’t call them sleepovers.

“I mean, you stay at Semper’s place overnight.”

“Yes, but not in her room,” Mom said. “Regardless. I wonder what you plan on doing now?”

“Well, breakfast,” I said. “Once Felix and Esme wake up. Esme snores.”

“What delightful information,” Mom said, her voice entirely flat. “And afterwards? I do mean for the future that isn’t as immediate.”

“Oh, well, uh... I don’t know? I guess I can get back to training. I’ll have Felix and Esme with me now, so I should be able to train even harder. And Felix doesn’t know how to read. So we need to teach her.”

“I see,” Mom said.

I blinked and looked up to her. “What’s wrong?”

“Did I say anything to indicate that there is something wrong?” Mom asked.

I nodded. “You said...” I coughed to clear my throat, then did my very best to imitate Mom’s most hoity-toity voice. “I see.” I nodded again. “That means that there’s something wrong, but you don’t know how to address it yet, so you’ll just pretend it’s not a problem while you think about it.”

“You are entirely too perceptive at times,” Mom said.

“And now you’re deflecting with compliments.” I smiled up at her. “Thanks!”

Mom made her laughing noise, that little ‘hmm’ at the back of her throat, and she brushed my hair back again. “Very well. I am somewhat concerned about the presence of more children in my castle. One was and is quite enough for me.”

“I don’t think Felix wants a mom, and Esme has had friends and family outside of here. And they’re not part-monster like I am. I don’t think you need to worry about anything. Besides, what will you do when I grow older and have babies and you become a grandmom?”

Mom stared.

Her eyes didn’t blink or waver, and the silence in the corridor grew and grew until I started to worry.

“No,” she said on the matter. It was a very final sort of no.

“No?” I repeated.

“Not for a century, at least.”

“I don’t think that’s how it works,” I said.

Mom shrugged, a careless yet somehow very graceful gesture. “It will work the way I say it does,” she said with the certainty of a Goddess.

“Well okay then, if you say so,” I said. I was too young for that kind of stuff anyway.

“I do say so,” Mom said. “Now, why don’t you go fetch your friends and find yourselves some breakfast. I’ll have a monster set out in the rear courtyard for you to fight.”

“Really?” I asked.

“Oh yes. I can see few futures where I will be able to keep you happy while locked up in this castle. Which means that you will inevitably find yourself charging headlong into trouble. The very least you can do is learn to fight your way out of that trouble.”

“I did alright in Montele,” I said.

“From the recounting it sounds as though a girl of your own age held her own against you, and may have been better.”

I pouted. “She was tough.”

“And you were not tough enough. You are talented, perhaps, but talent without work is a waste. Besides, you should learn how to fight alongside these friends of yours. It may well be a valuable skill.”

That did sound fun. “Okay Mom!” I said. I gave her another quick squeeze then ran back to my room.

I opened the door carefully, mostly because I didn’t want to wake my friends up, but it turned out that I didn’t need to bother. Felix was yawning and stretching out her arms and legs every which way, taking up a huge chunk of space on the pile of blankets we’d used as a bed.

Our pillow fort hadn’t survived the night, it seemed. Esme was inspecting the damages, one of the smaller pillows in hand as she looked around. “Oh, you’re there,” she said before gesturing to the mount of blankets and pillows. “I thought you were lost in there.”

“Nope!” I said. “I was out for a bit. So! Did you just want to get changed into something else and get breakfast, or should we get breakfast first?”

Felix bolted upright. “I like either one of those,” she said.

Both of my friends were in some of my PJs. They didn’t fit quite right on either of them. Felix was a lot thinner than I was, but she was also a little bit taller, so everything looked wrong on her and she kept pulling her pants back up, while Esme was a bit bigger around the hips and shorter, so nothing fit right for her either.

I’d have to ask the clothing-making monsters Mom used to make some things for them sooner rather than later.

“After breakfast we’re doing some training.”

“Training?” Esme asked.

“Yup!” I said. “Mom set a monster aside for us to fight. I usually do a bit of stretching and some running too.” I jogged on the spot, mostly to bleed off some energy.

Esme didn’t seem too keen on the idea. “I’ve trained a bit too, but it’s mostly meditation and cultivating your emotions.”

“Mom says that that kind of stuff’s a waste of time beyond learning how to cast a spell until you can do it reflexively. Meditation’s only worth so much.”

“That goes counter to a lot of modern teachings,” Esme said.

“Mom’s a god.”

Esme’s mouth shut with a click. “Well... I suppose.”

I giggled.

“I’ve never trained before, what’s it like?”

“It’s not so bad,” I said. “Maybe I can show you a few moves while we’re at it. Though I don’t know much about Joy magic.”

“Moves?” Felix asked. “Like spells?”

“Hmm, no, not quite. Most types of magic come with their own sort of martial art. Well, I guess there are some kinds of magic that have many arts associated with them. Some are meant to help you feel a certain way, others are more about using the advantages of that kind of magic in a fight. Water magic won’t be used the same way as like, wind.”

“Oh, I guess that makes sense,” Felix said. “If learning that will help, then I don’t mind. It sounds more fun than learning how to read.”

“We’ll just work in the morning,” I said. “In the afternoon we’ll start teaching you how to read.”

Felix’s shoulder slumped.

“That’s after lunch.”

“We get lunch?” she asked.

“Of course! Training works up your appetite. It makes you extra hungry,” I said.

Felix bounced to her feet, fists closed in determination. “Let’s train really hard, then,” she said.

Laughing, I led my friends out of my room, and we went upstairs to the smaller dining room where Mom and I had breakfast. Mom was sitting at the end of the table, reading something while a plate of eggs and ham and sausage cooled before her.

My friends silently insisted on sitting as far from Mom as they could, because they were both silly and hadn’t realized that Mom was a sweetie.

Serving monsters brought plates heaping with meats and fresh bread, and we stuffed ourselves full. It took some time, but my friends eventually relaxed and seemed to forget that Mom was there at all.

I glanced up to her towards the end, and I saw her looking back, a curious--but happy-glint in her eyes as she took the three of us in, roughhousing and playing and making a bit more noise than was necessary.

I think she would enjoy having more friends!

My friends were too young now, probably, but they’d grow up, and so would I, and we’d all be super strong, and really smart, and totally great!

One day soon, I’d make Mom so proud she wouldn’t know what to do with herself.

But first, I had to entertain my friends and work hard to become strong enough to earn that pride.

***