Hard Luck Hermit

The Hard Luck Hermit didn’t exactly feel like “home” to Corey yet, but it was still a welcome respite after the cold halls of the Timeka space station. Walking back to the ship, Corey had realized that the hallways were slightly slanted, making it easier to walk out than in. He didn’t even know why they had guest hangars if they were going to be so openly hostile to visitors, right down to the architecture.

“Hey, Farsus, do you know a lot about Timeka?”

“I am far from an expert, but I am knowledgeable,” Farsus said. “This is not the first time we have worked with them during my time alongside Kamak.”

“Cool. On a scale of one to ten-”

“How evil is Timeka?”

“How evil is Timeka,” Corey repeated.

“To the extent of my knowledge, a six,” Farsus said. “Which, given the extent of my ignorance, almost certainly places their actual evil at a seven or eight.”

“Okay, that’s...not actually helpful at all, I have no idea what your standards of evil are,” Corey said.

“They have a comparatively low number of corporate assassinations to their name,” Farsus said. “And almost no child and or slave labor.”

“Almost?”

“Different systems have different laws in regards to child labor,” Farsus said. “Timeka only practices it in systems where it is already legal.”

“And the slavery?”

“None that I am aware of. They do not actively trade with the Morrakesh Collective, where slavery is legal.”

“Huh. Not a fan of that,” Corey said. “I think Morrakesh is the guy those slavers were going to sell me to.”

“That tracks,” Tooley said. “The Collective buys a lot of slaves.”

“Good to know I dodged a bullet.”

“Yes, several of them,” Farsus said. “Unlike your companion HobridHee.”

“It was a figure of speech,” Corey said. “What’s up with that Collective, anyway? What do they need slaves for?”

“For the same reason anyone needs slaves: cheap labor,” Tooley said. “The Collective is its own little alliance of civilized galaxies, like the Galactic Council on a smaller scale. And also evil. It’s like forty percent actual government, sixty percent crime syndicate. As opposed to the Council, which is the other way around.”

“I was going to say, sounds like most governments,” Corey said with a chuckle.

“In my experience, most cultures have a similar joke,” Farsus said. “I am uncertain whether I consider the ubiquity of corruption to be depressing or amusing.”

“Amusing,” said Tooley.

“Depressing,” said Corey.

The difference of opinion never had a chance to become a discussion, as Kamak stomped his way back aboard the ship, in no mood for discussions of any sort.

“Tooley, we have a destination. Get it plugged in and get us moving.”

“Got it.”

Her rebellious streak didn’t extend to Timeka, who had a lot of money -and a lot of ways to kill Tooley if she fucked up their plans. She headed for the cockpit, and the rest of the crew followed, strapping in for takeoff.

“And before you get into anything that requires fine motor skills, I need to say something that might piss you off,” Kamak added.

“Most things you say piss me off.”

“I know. As soon as we’re done with this Timeka job, we’re going after that Sturit who’s chasing us.”

“Ah, right, so you can try to prove this is all somehow my fault.”

“No, you predictable bitch,” Kamak said. “Because he’s the closest thing we have to an actual lead in the entire god damn universe. We’ve got a description and a last known location. I’ve done more with less.”

“As is the nature of bounty hunting,” Farsus agreed. He’d seen a man traced across the galaxy by a single strand of hair, once upon a time.

“If we get any better leads, I promise you we’ll follow them,” Kamak said. “Believe me, the last thing I want in my life is another blue asshole who probably wants to kill me.”

“Whatever you say,” Tooley grunted.

“Chin up, Toobertas. We’ll have plenty of time for other people to try and kill us while we’re doing our job,” Kamak said. “We’ll have another lead before you know it.”

“If we survive,” Tooley muttered under her breath.

“Ah, fuck that,” Kamak said. “You saw the little bastard they sent after us here. We’re clearly not dealing with the cream of the crop here.”

“Last time you said something that, I got shot in the head,” Doprel said.

“You have a secondary endoskull, you were fine,” Kamak said.

“It still hurt,” Doprel said.

“You get shot every other job we do anyway, Doprel, you stand in front of bullets on purpose,” Kamak said. Due to his more durable physiology, Doprel often intercepted bullets on behalf of his fragile teammates. “Nine out of ten times I say someone’s shit, they’re just shit. Trust me.”

The cockpit was silent after that, but for the sound of Tooley hitting buttons and pulling levers. Kamak couldn’t argue with the silence. He wasn’t entirely sure he trusted himself right now either.