Dial H for Heroics

Josie tried to talk to the Enterprise. The machine intelligence said she was cut off

until the order was rescinded. She had half a mind to do something to Jack.

Her four helpers tried to hide smiles at her predicament. She glared at them. Jack

wasn’t their fault, but she was more than willing to take her anger out on those

nearby.

“So we have these three women in these rooms,” said Vin. “We don’t have any more

rooms. What do we do now?”

“I guess we pause,” said Josie. “We know the treatment works. We just need to do it

faster so we can get them back on their feet. We probably are going to need them to

answer some basic questions to get them checked after they wake up.”

“What about your children taking you to a show?,” said Massa.

“My birthday isn’t for two more months,” said Josie. “I can’t believe Jack would use

that for some kind of excuse to be alone with Elaine. He’s alone with her every

night.”

“So you think something else is going on?,” asked Massa.

“I know Jack,” said Josie. “This has all the looks of a practical joke.”

“Take Markus as your date,” said Vin.

“Excuse me,” said Josie and Markus at the same time.

“Neither one of you have a sense of fun,” said Vin. “You would be great company

together. And this Jack did say bring someone you don’t care about.”

“He said bring someone who doesn’t know me,” said Josie.

“And I have great sense of fun,” said Markus.

“When was the last time you laughed at something funny?,” asked Vin. He waited for

his partner to come out of the cloud of thought he had been plunged into. “Exactly my

point. You two should go see the show together and make a night of it. Some dining,

some kissing, some running through the streets naked. That’s how the wife and I got

together.”

“Which wife?,” asked Markus.

“Never you mind about that,” said Vin. “I think we are done for the day. I am going

to write up my report. You two get cleaned up and get ready for your show.”

“What if I don’t want to go to the show?,” said Josie.

“Come up with some excuse for your children,” said Vin. He walked toward the door.

“Something that won’t make them cry in sadness.”

“They’re not my children,” said Josie to his vanishing back.

“I am sure it will be a fine time, Ear Ripper,” said Massa. She smiled at the younger

woman’s discomfort. “And maybe your Ducklings will want another man around who

doesn’t say, or do, scary crazy things.”

She gestured for Serni to follow her so they could leave Josie and her potential date

alone to work out what they wanted to do.

“I think you can find someone more suitable for a night,” said Markus. “This is Vin’s

way of embarrassing me.”

“Are you embarrassed to be seen with me?,” asked Josie. She crossed her arms.

“Not really,” said Markus. “I admit there is a certain awkwardness to this situation

since we have only met twice, and you punched me in the face one of those times. I

don’t know you, and you don’t know me.”

“What do you want to know?,” asked Josie.

“I have no idea,” said Markus. “That’s why this is so awkward. And your children are

expecting you to be there.”

“They aren’t my children,” said Josie. “I don’t have any children. They are my

adopted sisters. It’s just I am an old maid, and they needed looking after when we

met. Just like Jane’s Amazons needed someone to help them out when they came

back to town. And they are helping me with this hospital thing for the city.”

“Are you embarrassed to be seen with me?,” said Markus.

“Why would I be?,” asked Josie. “I don’t know you.”

“I will be glad to escort you for one night free of quest liability,” said Markus.

“Really?,” asked Josie.

“That way you don’t have to pay for it because of my license, and the guild

agreements,” said Markus.

“What do you expect out of this?,” asked Josie.

“Realistically, nothing,” said Markus. “We’re nowhere close to being intimate. We’re

not even close enough to share a meal at this point. Maybe we’re close enough for

that, but not some meal in a real restaurant, much less at one of our homes by

ourselves. Additionally, you have a lot of entanglements I am not sure I want to be

involved with on more than a surface level. And the fact you are my employer is not

good either in my opinion. I don’t want to lose my status in the guild because you

didn’t have a good time with your sisters.”

Josie looked at him with a frown.

“You’ve thought about this a lot, haven’t you?,” she asked.

“I have had some problems with women before I came to Hawk Ridge,” said Markus.

“It’s one of the reasons I try to avoid things like this.”

“That is reasonable,” said Josie.

“Do you want to take in this show?,” asked Markus.

“That’s not the right question,” said Josie. “Do you want to take me to the show, even

with all that comes with it?”

“How bad could it be?,” asked Markus.

“It can be as bad as what happened to Caroline, or anyone else that can be used for

a lever,” said Josie. “That’s why I think you should think about it before you agree

to anything like this despite the prodding your partner is giving you for being a shut-

in.”

“I’m not a shut-in,” said Markus. “I just like sitting on my patio, reading my books,

and sipping my wine. When I am done with quests, I like to relax in the comfort of

my own home.”

“You don’t go out courting?,” asked Josie.

“No,” said Markus. “Again, I have had a lot of bad luck with women over the years.

I try to steer clear of them when I can. Vin just thinks everyone should be finding

their soulmate.”

He put up quote marks for the word “soulmate”.

“All right,” said Josie. “I will accept your companionship, but keep your hands to

yourself.”

“Aw, yes,” said Markus. “I want to hug and kiss the most dangerous woman in the

city while trying to impress her wards. That will end well.”

“We could even get married,” said Josie. She smiled at his expression.

“Could we?,” asked Markus. His eyebrows were up in his puzzlement.

“I have never set a husband on fire,” said Josie.

“That’s comforting to know,” said Markus.

“I think you two should come to an agreement and do that,” said the woman in the

bed. “You will be a lot happier.”

“You’re awake?,” said Josie. “You’re awake. Markus, get Massa.”

“Who’s Massa?,” said the woman as Markus fled the room.

“She is the head nurse,” said Josie. “What do you remember?”

“I was taken by some toughs in town,” said the woman. “I had to sit in a wagon with

some other women for days. Then I was taken by some soldiers and strapped down

to a table. I don’t remember anything after that.”

“Do you remember your name?,” said Josie.

“Flaione Gild,” said the woman.

“All right, Flaione,” said Josie. “My name is Josie Fox. You were rescued by some

adventurers from a laboratory up north in Shemmaria. They were using you and some

others to conduct experiments to make superior soldiers. We are testing an elixir to

clean your body of the Goblin Tree solution they were using. You are in Hawk Ridge

in Grecious at Jane’s Hospital.”

“How long have I been away from my family?,” said Flaione.

“I have no idea,” said Josie. “We brought you in about two weeks ago maybe. We just

now finished testing the elixir on our nurses, and have started working on the people

we grabbed. You are literally the third person we have worked on today.”

Massa came in the room with Serni. They both looked concerned about this

development.

“We need someone to stay with the other two ladies until they wake up,” said Josie.

“They’re going to have to ask questions to make sure they’re all there.”

“I will get some bodies to sit in,” said Massa. “At least we know the elixir helps with

the spinal growths.”

“Can I go home?,” asked Flaione. “I have a husband and children back home.”

“Can your husband read?,” asked Josie.

“Yes,” said the woman. “We both can.”

“Let’s send him a letter,” said Josie. She pulled out a sheet of paper, and a pen from

her bag. She wished she had thought to put in an end table next to the bed, but hadn’t

considered it since lanterns and wall torches were more common. She pulled a mobile

table to her, and put the paper down on it. “I’ll send him the basics and see if he will

write back a reply on a blank sheet of paper.”

“All right,” said Flaione. “I hope he doesn’t think I am dead.”

Josie wrote a small letter explaining how they had found Madam Gild, brought her

to Hawk Ridge, and were nursing her back to health. Eventually, they would send her

home when she could walk on her own again. A separate piece of paper was included

for a reply. She showed their patient the letter so she knew what was being sent. The

watchbearer sent the letter and a blank piece of paper to the address of the Gild home.

They waited for a reply.

Master Gild sent back a reply immediately filled with hundreds of questions. He

wanted to know everything that had happened to his wife. He had thought she had run

off. That was the story going around town.

“You should be good to get out of here in a couple of days,” said Josie. “I can send

you home after that. We’re waiting for your strength to build up so you can move

around on your own, and to see if the growths come back from what we did to fix

you.”

“Please send my husband that, and tell him I will be home in a week,” said Madam

Gild. “I think you should go out with the young man that was here. Maybe start your

own family.”

“I have enough family,” said Josie. “I don’t need any more. I will take him out just

to show my partner that I don’t need his meddling.”

“Never get in a competition over hearts,” said Flaione. “They never go the way you

want.”

“That’s nothing new,” said Josie. “I’m going to get you home. Give yourself a few

days to get stronger. I work for an organization, and they might call me away at any

time. I will leave word so that someone will help you travel, or anything else you

need while here.”

“Am I really in Hawk Ridge?,” asked Flaione.

“Have you ever been here?,” asked Josie.

“No,” said the patient. “I have never seen a big city.”

“I can take you up to the roof,” said Josie. “You’ll be able to see part of the city and

wall from there.”

“Maybe later,” said Flaione. “I think I need to go back to sleep.”

“All right,” said Josie. “I’ll let you sleep. I don’t know when they will serve dinner,

or what they are serving. I’m sure someone will bring you something so you can start

getting stronger.”

“If you can get me home, I will be happy,” said the woman. She closed her eyes

against the light in the windows.

Some people will be unhappy if I find out who they are.

Josie stepped out in the hall. Massa and a couple of nurses talked in a rough circle.

“She’s sleeping again,” said Josie. “She seemed together when she was talking. We’re

going to have to check her ability to move, and think, before we cut her loose.”

“So the elixir works on people fully under,” said Massa. “That’s good.”

“Is Markus around?,” asked Josie. “If Jack hadn’t called in the middle of things, I

could have just pushed the suggestion off. Now I have to make a deal about it when

I don’t want to go to a show.”

“He is waiting by the desk,” said Massa. “I think he is scared.”

“If he is scared now, he will be terrified of the girls,” said Josie. “Let’s get this over

with.”

Josie found Markus standing by the desk. He watched as the nurses started moving.

None of the other sleepers were ready to wake up yet. Now they could wake them up

as soon as they had rooms.

“Do you want to go out with me, Markus?,” asked Josie. “I’m okay if you say no. No

one should be forced to go out with someone if they don’t like it.”

“Are you really okay with it, or are you saying that so I will lower my guard so you

can rip my ear off?,” asked Markus.

“If I wanted you to lower your guard, I wouldn’t tell you,” said Josie. “It’s a straight

yes/no question. I can go alone.”

“I’m really scared of you, and I don’t know what the best thing to do is in this case,”

said Markus. “I don’t believe in soulmates like Vin. I think he just got lucky and is

using that to tell people it’s how it’s done.”

“I promise that I won’t do anything to you,” said Josie. “We’ll go to the show, tell the

kids we are not courting, and I’ll take you home so you can sit on your patio and

drink your wine.”

“And you are okay with that?,” asked Markus.

“Yes,” said Josie. “It’s not the first time.”

“All right,” said Markus. “We can go out and do a thing. I have had some awful bad

luck courting.”

“It’s probably not going to get better,” said Josie.